Robin Devereaux-Nelson

In Violet's Wake


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always in high gear.

      It was the childlessness, however, that broke the camel’s back for the couple. Costa’s cousin Niki and his wife came up from Detroit to help with the Saginaw enterprise, which was booming. The couple had a little girl, Eva. She was a gorgeous two-year-old with rosy skin and black hair, little wet brown eyes that flashed. Costa was enchanted.

      Costa loved sharing their home with them—he’d missed having family around. His parents had never visited, always saying they were too busy with the Detroit business, but Costa knew it was because of Violet. He wished they could see in her what he saw—a woman who was beautiful, smart, vibrant. Violet ate up life like it was a baklava, full of sweet nuttiness, rich butter, and honey.

      Violet, though outwardly congenial, soon resented the camaraderie of Costa, Niki, and his pretty wife, Olivia. She complained about their late-night drinking and laughter. She disliked having another woman in her kitchen, even though Costa teasingly told Violet she was not the most domestic woman in the world, so why did she care about the kitchen now?

      But it was Eva of whom Violet was most jealous. The girl had Costa wrapped around her little finger. He would sneak home after the lunch rush, send the sitter out, and sit rocking the little girl to sleep for her nap, singing lullabies in Greek. He spoiled her with gifts, told her she was beautiful, sweet, smart—all of the things he used to say to Violet.

      One night as he was reading the little girl a bedtime story, he heard a rustling in the hallway. He laid Eva in her crib and softly walked to the guest-room door, surprising a tearful Violet. She was wearing her coat and gloves, two large suitcases at her feet.

      “What are you doing?” Costa asked her.

      “I can’t stand it anymore.”

      “Stand? Stand what?” He put his hands on her shoulders, but she shrugged him away. “Violet. I’m sorry. I’ll tell Niki he has to find a place. This week. I promise.”

      “No, Costa,” she said. “I don’t care about that.” Tears streamed down her ivory cheeks. She looked tragically beautiful, heartbreaking. “It’s her.” She inclined her head toward the doorway of the guest room.

      “Eva?” Costa was incredulous. “Violet, grow up. She’s a little baby.”

      “She’s what I can’t give you,” Violet said. “Ever.” She picked up her bags. “I love you, Costa. But I have to go.”

      At first, Costa hadn’t worried. Violet had left many times before, and after several passionate phone calls between the couple, she had come back. Each time it was like having a honeymoon all over again. It had gotten to a point that Costa almost looked forward to these little forays of hers. Really spiced things up. “Nothing like a little hot blood,” his father used to say.

      But this time she really disappeared. He tried all her regular haunts. Her family’d never approved of him, so they would barely speak to him. Even the cops had been little help. Wives and husbands left their spouses all the time. To the cops, he was just some poor schmuck who’d gotten dumped. They’d reluctantly filed a missing person’s report, but it had brought no news. He had to face the fact that Violet didn’t want to be found. Costa was beside himself with worry and remorse, in complete despair. And then, three months after the day she left, divorce papers arrived in the mail from some little town up North. Next thing he heard, Violet was marrying some Hicksville guy.

      Remembering what happened brought it all back. Violet had said she loved him when she left. Costa had been sure she’d come back—just like that poor sap, Marshall. Costa recalled it had been especially lonely when Niki, Olivia, and Eva left for their new house in the suburbs. He hadn’t even told his parents Violet had left him, and he threatened Niki with death if he revealed the truth. He didn’t want to suffer the I-told-you-so, the shame, his mother’s gloating laughter. Marshall was on his own. Costa knew the guy had a long road ahead of him.

      After Violet left Costa, he’d had his own long road—in fact, he’d almost lost the restaurant, disappearing into drink, sitting in his house in the dark, in the bedroom he’d shared with Violet. If it hadn’t been for Niki, he would have lost everything. He owed his cousin his living. And more. But then, that’s what family was for, right? Violet had never really understood that.

      He remembered his despair, the way he wanted to hunt her and her new lover down, the way her behavior in the club played over and over in his head. Pictures of Violet laughing, dancing, letting men buy her drinks. “Don’t be jealous,” she’d said. “I’m just being friendly—and they’re buying your liquor and food, tipping the girls. Don’t be a baby,” she’d said. A baby. He was no baby. He was a man.

      But he remembered feeling like a baby, when he knew she was gone for good. How he’d lain in their bed, drunk and stupid, crying big man tears into the pillow. Trashing his own restaurant. It’d cost him a bundle to repair his own destruction.

      He thought again about Marshall and how he’d broken the window and they’d smashed up the restaurant. Marshall was as messed up as Costa had been back then.

      DATE: 09-22-2011

      CLIENT: Violet Mary VanDahmm nee. Benjamin

      CASE NUMBER: V2011-100982

      DATE OF BIRTH: 09-17-1972

       PRESENTING PROBLEM:

      Violet is an intelligent separated thirty-nine-year-old white woman who is self-referred to this practice. She states that she recently acquired a job as an executive’s assistant at a real estate company but also states she does not like the position. Violet is seeking therapy because she is recently separated from her sixth husband, Marshall. She states she is not sleeping well and has been feeling anxious in general “for a long time.” She states she has benefited from talk therapy in the past and wishes to work on, in her words, “identity and abandonment” issues. When asked why she did not return to her former therapist, Violet stated that he did not understand her. She refused to discuss this further.

       HISTORY:

      Prior to the initial intake appointment, Violet signed a waiver releasing her past therapy records to this office. Patient notes from a Dr. Eric Coulter have been received and reviewed, as well as several group therapy notes from the Center for Awakening. Violet was born in Saginaw, Michigan, to working-class parents. She is an only child. She has had significant issues with her mother and her uninvolved, yet present, father. She reported being an awkward, overweight teenager with few friends. Patient notes state Violet was “moody” and taken to bouts of self-centered dreaminess, and was an average, unmotivated student whose greatest interest was theatre and art.

      She first sought therapy while married to her first husband, Winston Montgomery, to “work out childhood issues.” The first husband was an affluent entrepreneur some years her senior. He died three years into the marriage. Violet continued therapy with Dr. Coulter into the second marriage to a restaurateur, Costa Pavlos, until Mr. Pavlos refused to pay for continued therapy, after which Violet attended several group therapy sessions at the Center for Awakening, a new age, self-exploration counseling endeavor.

       MEDICAL PROBLEMS:

      Nothing significant noted.

       CURRENT PRECSRIPTION MEDICATIONS:

      Client states she has previously taken Xanax and Ambien on an as-needed basis, but that her prescription has lapsed.

       MOOD AND AFFECT:

      At first impression, Violet presents as slightly narcissistic, with a need for admiration and inflated self-involvement. There is a sense of a lack of empathy when discussing past relationships (with her six husbands) and parents, whom, she states, “never understood” her. However, there is a sweetness and genuineness about her that is charming, and her lack of empathy does not come off as either cruel or deliberate. She is attractive and carefully (albeit somewhat seductively) dressed, articulate,