my heart, I choose you now and forever for my king, and with unshakeable fidelity I would offer my irrevocable service, submitting myself to your holy laws and ordinances.
3. O Blessed Virgin Mother of God, you will be my example. I will follow you with all reverence and respect.
O my good angel, bring me to this heavenly company, do not leave me until I have reached them, with whom I will sing forever, in testimony of my choice, “Glory be to Jesus, my Lord!”
Chapter 19
How to Make a General Confession
Such meditations as these, my daughter, will help you. Having made them, go on bravely, in the spirit of humility, to make your general confession. But I entreat you, do not be troubled by any sort of fearfulness. The scorpion who stings us is venomous, but when his oil has been distilled, it is the best remedy for his bite. Even so, sin is shameful when we commit it, but when reduced to repentance and confession, it becomes beneficial and honorable. Contrition and confession are in themselves so lovely and sweet that they efface the ugliness and disperse the ill flavor of sin. Simon the leper called Mary Magdalene a sinner (Mk 14; Lk 7:39), but the Lord turned the conversation to the perfume of her ointment and the greatness of her love. If we are really humble, my daughter, our sins will be infinitely displeasing to us, because they offend God; but it will be welcome and sweet to accuse ourselves of them, because in so doing we honor God, and there is always somewhat soothing in fully telling the doctor all the details of our pain.
When you come to your spiritual father, imagine yourself on Mount Calvary, at the feet of the crucified Savior, whose precious blood falls freely to cleanse you from all your sin. Though it is not his physical blood, still it is the merit of that outpoured blood that is sprinkled over his penitents as they kneel in confession. So be sure that you open your heart fully and put away your sins by confessing them, for in proportion as they are cast out, so will the precious merits of the passion of Christ come in and fill you with blessings.
Tell everything simply and with straightforwardness, and thoroughly satisfy your conscience in doing so. Then listen to the admonitions and counsels of God’s minister, saying in your heart, “Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.” It is truly God to whom you listen, for he said to his representatives, “Whoever hears you, hears me” (Lk 10:16).
Then, as a summary of your contrition, take the following promise, and after studying and meditating on it carefully, read it through with as earnest an intention as you can make.
Chapter 20
A Firm Promise Made to Confirm the Soul’s Resolution to Serve God, as a Conclusion to Its Acts of Penance
I,
In the presence of God and of all the company of heaven, having considered the infinite mercy of his heavenly goodness to me, a miserable, unworthy creature, whom he has created, preserved, sustained, delivered from so many dangers, and filled with so many blessings; having above all considered the incomprehensible mercy and love with which this most good God has borne with me in my sinfulness, leading me so tenderly to repentance, and waiting so patiently for me until this (present) year of my life, despite all my ingratitude, disloyalty, and faithlessness, by which I have delayed turning to him and, despising his grace, have offended him anew; and further, remembering that in my baptism I was solemnly and happily dedicated to God as his child, and that in defiance of the profession then made in my name, I have so often miserably profaned my gifts, turning them against God’s divine majesty; now, coming to myself prostrate in heart and soul before the throne of his justice, I acknowledge and confess that I am justly accused and convicted of treason against his majesty, and guilty of the death and passion of Jesus Christ by reason of the sins I have committed, for which he died, bearing the reproach of the cross; so that I deserve nothing but eternal damnation.
But turning to God’s throne of infinite mercy, detesting the sins of my past life with all my heart and all my strength, I humbly desire and ask grace, pardon, and mercy, with entire absolution from my sin, in virtue of the death and passion of that same Lord and redeemer, on whom I lean as the only ground of my hope. I renew the sacred promise of faithfulness to God made in my name at my baptism, renouncing the devil, the world, and the flesh, abhorring their accursed suggestions, vanities, and lusts, now and for all eternity. And turning to a loving and merciful God, I desire, intend, and deliberately resolve to serve and love him now and eternally, devoting my mind and all its faculties, my soul and all its powers, my heart and all its affections, my body and all its senses, to his will.
I resolve never to misuse any part of my being by opposing his divine will and sovereign majesty, to which I wholly offer myself in intention, vowing always to be his loyal, obedient, and faithful servant without any change or recall. But if through the promptings of the Enemy, or human infirmity, I should fail in any way to keep my resolution and dedication, I earnestly resolve, by the grace of the Holy Spirit, to rise up again as soon as I perceive my fall, and turn anew, without any delay, to seek his divine mercy. This is my firm will and intention, my inviolable, irrevocable resolution, which I make and confirm without any reserve, in the holy presence of God, in the sight of the Church triumphant, and before the Church militant, my mother, who accepts my declaration in the person of him who, as her representative, hears me make it. Be pleased, O eternal, all-powerful, and all-loving God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, to confirm me in this resolution, and accept my hearty and willing offering. And as you have been pleased to inspire me with the will to make it, give me also the needed strength and grace to keep it. O God, you are my God, the God of my heart, my soul, and spirit, and I acknowledge and adore you, now and for all eternity. Glory be to Jesus. Amen.
Chapter 21
Conclusion of This First Purification
Having made this resolution, wait attentively, and open the ears of your heart, that you may hear in spirit the absolution which the Lord of your soul, sitting on the throne of his mercy, will speak in heaven before the saints and angels when his priest absolves you here below in his name. Be sure that all that company of blessed ones rejoices in your joy and sings a song of untold gladness, embracing you and accepting you as cleansed and sanctified. Truly, my daughter, this is a marvelous deed, and a most blessed bargain for you; for in giving yourself to his divine majesty, you gain him and save yourself for eternal life. No more remains to do, save to take the pen and heartily sign your promise, and then hasten to the altar, where God on his side will sign and seal your absolution, and his promise of heaven, giving himself to you in his sacrament as a sacred seal placed upon your renewed heart. And thus, dear child, your soul will be cleansed from sin and from all its affections. But because these affections are easily rekindled, thanks to our infirmity and concupiscence (which may be mortified, but which can never be completely extinguished while we live), I will give you certain counsels to practice so that you may avoid mortal sin, and any affection for it, in the future. And as these counsels will also help you to attain a yet more perfect purification, before giving them, I will say a little bit about the absolute perfection to which I seek to lead you.
Chapter 22
The Need to Purge Away All Tendency to Venial Sin
As the day grows brighter, we can see more plainly the soils and stains upon our face when we look in the mirror. In the same way, as the interior light of the Holy Spirit enlightens our conscience, we see more distinctly the sins, inclinations, and imperfections that hinder our progress toward real devotion. And the same light that shows us these blots and stains kindles in us the desire to be cleansed and purged from them.
You will find then, my child, that besides the mortal sins and their affections from which your soul has already been purged, you are beset by many inclinations and tendencies to venial sin. Note, I do not say you will find venial sins, but the inclination and tendency to them. One is quite different from the other. We can never be altogether free from venial sin — at least not until after a very long persistence in this purity. But we can be without any affection