Etiquette Guide to Japan. Boye Lafayette De Mente

itself out according to real or perceived rank and give the kami-za (kah-me-zah), or “seat of honor,” to the ranking person or guest. When there are foreign visitors in the group, one of the Japanese will invariably assume a leadership role and direct them to the seats regarded as appropriate for their rank and the occasion.

      In any room, the place of honor is usually the seat (or desk or table) that is farthest from the entrance and located at what might be called the “head” of the room. In a room with a window or windows on only one side, that side is generally designated as the head of the room. The seats of honor should face the door or entrance.

      There is also a position of honor in an elevator (in the center nearest the back wall), in a car (the backseat behind the driver), at a head table (in the center of the table away from and opposite the door), in a train coach (the window seat or the center seat), in the first-class cabin of an airplane (a window seat about mid-cabin, on the right side away from the door), when walking with a group (the center of the group), and so on.

      When your hosts are Japanese, it is proper to let them designate where you should sit. It is very improper to take the initiative and seat yourself in the place of honor, as ignorant visitors sometimes inadvertently do. If you are the host, it is very important that you direct the ranking Japanese guest to the seat or place of honor and not accept any show of reluctance on his or her part, even if you have to use some degree of playful force.

      In fast-food restaurants, chain coffee shops, or other casual spots, one practice sometimes considered selfish in the West but perfectly acceptable in Japan is to put a personal object on an available chair right after entering and before ordering, so that no one else can take your seat.

      11

      Dining Etiquette

      Perhaps no other area in the lives of ordinary Japanese has been more carefully prescribed or ritualized than the simple process of eating. As a result of the overall cultural emphasis on defining, classifying, categorizing, and systemizing everything, the early Japanese turned the preparation, presentation, and consumption of food into a ritualized experience that was both aesthetic and culinary.

      Meals at the imperial court, at the court of the shogun, in the castles of the provincial lords, in the homes of ranking samurai, in Buddhist temples, at traditional inns, and in the homes of well-to-do merchants were exquisite exercises in stylized service and beautiful blends of colors, textures, and tastes as carefully choreographed as a Kabuki play.

      The beauty of the food, the artistic complement of the table-ware, the formal manner of the service, and the proper dining etiquette were considered among the highest levels of cultural expression, indicative of one’s character and refinement.