of being watched and looked up from my reading.
‘Hi! You’re awake.’
Thomas reached for his glasses and frowned after he put them on. ‘Who are you?’ His voice was low and gruff.
‘I’m Samantha Wishaw. I’m a district nurse but—’
‘Where’s your uniform?’
‘I’m not working today but—’
‘Then why are you here?’
There was clear irritation in his voice and I felt like I was being interrogated. ‘I wanted to see you because…’ I hesitated, wondering if this had been a bad idea.
‘Come on. Spit it out!’
‘I’m the one who found you yesterday.’
He stared at me for a moment, eyes wide. ‘You’re the one who called the ambulance?’
I smiled. ‘Yes.’
His eyes narrowed. ‘And I suppose you expect me to thank you for that?’
The anger in his voice took me aback. ‘No. That’s not why I’m here.’
‘Good, because you won’t get any thanks from me. Exactly the opposite. What gave you the right? If it hadn’t been for you, I could have joined my Gwendoline and now you’ve ruined it. Twenty years I’ve been without her. Twenty hideously miserable years but it was nearly at an end. Then you bloody barged in where you weren’t wanted and tried to make it all better. Well, it isn’t better. It’ll never be better until I join my wife.’
His voice had risen to a shout and I was conscious of the other patients and visitors glancing in our direction and whispering. I also felt sick at his words. He’d wanted to die. He hated me for stopping it. How could I even begin to respond to that?
I lowered my voice. ‘I’m so sorry to hear you’ve lost your wife but I couldn’t just leave you there. It would go against everything I’m trained for.’
‘What were you doing in my house anyway?’ He still sounded angry but at least he’d reduced the volume.
‘I got lost, stopped to ask for directions, looked through the window and saw you’d collapsed.’
‘So you broke into my house and meddled?’
‘I didn’t break in. The door was open.’ I bit my lip. ‘I let myself in again this morning, though, to—’
‘What?’ He tried to sit upright but was clearly too exhausted and slumped back against the pillows.
‘To feed your cat,’ I said. ‘She’s beautiful. Does she have a name?’
His face softened. ‘You found Misty-Blue?’
I smiled. ‘That’s a lovely name. Really suits her.’
‘I thought she’d wandered off. Haven’t seen her for a few days. Thought she’d been taken from me too.’
‘Well, she’s fine and she’s had a couple of good meals. That’s kind of why I’m here. Would you be happy for me to keep feeding her until you’re discharged?’
‘So you can snoop around my house? How do I know you’re not a burglar?’
‘If I was a burglar, do you really think I’d be sitting here asking for permission to feed your cat? I’d be looting your house right now.’
He pursed his lips. ‘Did you put the key back where you found it?’
‘Yes.’
‘Good. You can leave now.’
‘You don’t want me to feed Misty-Blue?’
He fixed me with a hard stare. ‘She’s fine fending for herself.’
‘I really don’t mind doing it.’
‘But I do. Nobody asked you to call an ambulance and nobody asked you to feed my cat. I don’t need anybody’s help. Goodbye, Nurse Wishaw.’
‘Okay. It’s your choice. I’m really sorry for upsetting you.’ I placed my textbook and pen back in my bag and hitched it onto my shoulder. ‘Take care of yourself, Thomas.’
‘It’s Mr Mickleby,’ he snapped.
‘I brought you some fruit.’ I indicated the bag on the table then made a swift exit before he could hurl any more insults – or perhaps the fruit – at me. I’d already taken enough stick this weekend to last a lifetime.
‘I don’t know why you want my approval,’ Hannah said later that day, rubbing her back and adjusting her position on the sofa at Fuchsia Cottage. I’d filled her in on everything that had happened since I last saw her at the church. ‘You’re going to feed that cat whatever I say.’
I smiled. ‘You know me too well. Do you think I should visit Mr Mickleby in hospital tomorrow?’
She raised her eyebrows and I laughed.
‘You can’t blame me for wanting some reassurance,’ I said. ‘I seem to be doing everything wrong at the moment and Mr Mickleby was far from ecstatic about me saving him.’
Hannah sighed. ‘Poor man on his own for twenty years. He’s obviously very lonely, but it’s a common story, especially in remote locations. You must have seen it before.’
‘Unfortunately, yes. Too many times.’
Hannah fixed her eyes on mine. ‘Be careful, Sam. He sounds like an angry and bitter man, perhaps understandably, but he’s going to take out his frustrations on you and you’re not his nurse. You don’t need to be part of his life. I know you’ll accept whatever he throws at you because you’re used to doing that with your mum but we both know it brings you down, no matter how much you try to brush it off.’
‘I’ll be careful. I promise. I just feel drawn to him. I don’t know why.’ I shrugged. ‘Anyway, let’s move onto cheerier subjects. You were going to show me the nursery.’
I stayed at Hannah’s for another hour, looking at the nursery and everything they’d purchased ready for the baby’s arrival. Gushing over cute clothes and soft toys was a welcome distraction from the situation at home and with Mr Mickleby.
At Hedgehog Hollow later, Misty-Blue appeared for food once more. I wanted to play with her but, as I was there against Mr Mickleby’s wishes, I wasn’t going to risk sticking around longer than necessary.
Driving back to Whitsborough Bay, I felt on edge. Mr Mickleby’s reaction had really thrown me and it wasn’t like me to be so affected by an angry patient, not that he was actually one of my patients. Could it be because I felt guilty? Guilty that I’d saved a man when all he wanted was to escape his lonely existence and be with his wife. Guilty that he could still have years ahead of him, all alone, while the home that had presumably once been filled with love and laughter gradually fell into further ruin. Guilty that I hadn’t been there to save Gramps who, despite also grieving for his lost love, had found a way forward without her and, in the same circumstances, would have wanted to live.
15
The house was in darkness when I got back to Whitsborough Bay. Dad had left a note to say he’d gone out for a drink with one of his colleagues. Mum was presumably still at Auntie Louise’s.
I’d phoned Chloe several times across the day but it rang once each time then went to voicemail. I wondered if she’d blocked me and a quick search