Children teach us about nature and love as part of the earth element. Puberty to about age fifty is the Pitta or fire stage of life. In this stage of life, there is fire, ego, separation, sharpness. It is also a time of moving forward and accomplishment. The Pitta stage can transform. Teenage rebellion is a good example of the fire element. Watch out he/she is on fire, I would say of my own teenagers when they were in a particularly angry or righteous state. Professional sports and competition is the realm of fire. Fire, when out of balance destroys. Out of balance fire can also manifest as criticism directed at the self or others. Vata or air/ether stage of life is age fifty and up. These are the wisdom years of air. When we are high in the air, we can see the big picture. Air is inspiring and dominates the heart center. As the number of humans who are living in the Vata stage of life increases on the planet, I believe they will bring a much-needed breath of fresh “air.” For the next few decades as the number of people over sixty-five doubles and the number of centenarians increases eight fold, the world will transform with more people in this inspirational heartfelt time of life. People who are in balance in the air stage of life offer considerable wisdom. People who are out of balance in the air stage of life become out of touch and disconnected
Keep Your Fire Burning
Critical to Super Aging is finding one’s purpose or reinventing one’s purpose. A purpose not driven by ego, but by a deep desire. When you are younger, you have more of the fire element. Our drives and ambitions can have more of a fiery quality and when fire is out of balance, a person can be egoic and obnoxious. When you reach middle age, you must adjust, but not abandon your ambition and deep desires. Often purpose transforms to a desire to serve. Purpose becomes humbler and may be better described as contribution.
Chip Conley found his purpose in listening to and helping digital natives embrace emotional intelligence and leadership as they disrupted the hospitality industry. All generations gained wisdom and transferred information. When you find your purpose, you thrive in your able to meet adversity and face the challenges in your life, and especially those of aging. A purpose as we age is our passion and fire, it burns brightly and with strength. It helps to point us in the right direction to create a legacy, have better relationships or pursue a new vocation as an artist. Later in this chapter I will offer several styles of therapy or exploratory work that will be perfect for finding your passion and purpose.
Finding your purpose or reinventing your purpose is the at the heart aging in a healthy way. When you know your why, you can build a healthy life to support your why. Other words that may describe your purpose or your why could be contribution or service. If purpose sounds to lofty or goal oriented. Maybe asking the question, how can I serve the world right now in my life? Your answer may be different than it was ten or twenty or even thirty years ago. Don’t be afraid to keep it simple. A grandfather named Tsegai told me that he drove Lyft for four to five hours a day to save money to give to his grandsons, ages seven and ten. He had retired from driving big rigs and running his own trucking business. He loved driving and he knew that his health depended on keeping busy. He set a goal to save a set amount for his grandsons. When he hits his mark, he told me he would like to serve young children in his community. He plans to volunteer to read and tutor elementary school children. He realized the importance of having goals and visions for his “retirement” years.
Your contribution or purpose may be to enjoy stimulating and wise conversations with friends and family. You may not be giving a TED Talk, but I know that if you have a purpose to have wise conversations, there will be a ripple effect. You will be gaining the health benefits of living your purpose and your purpose will in turn benefit the world. Your stimulating and inspiring conversations, if this is your purpose can embolden others young and old to come into their own powerful purpose.
Numerous studies have demonstrated that having a strong life purpose may help you dodge many debilitating conditions associated with aging. A 2017 study found that having a clear purpose had strong physiological effects on your health. In one study, people who reported having a purpose slept better and had less diagnosable sleep issues. Another study found a connection between those who reported feeling purposeful to having a faster gait and stronger grip strength. A study of older adults at Northwestern University defined purpose as, “having aspirations and goals for the future and feeling that experience in life are meaningful.” People who reported having purpose have less sleep issues according to the study published in the July 2017 Sleep Science and Practice Journal. And subjects in this study were over 50 percent African American, a group that is often left out of research data yet suffer on average more sleep disturbances and a shorter life expectancy than white counterparts in the United States. The study found a link between purpose and better sleep over a long period of time. “Helping people cultivate a purpose in life could be an effective drug-free strategy to improve sleep quality, particularly for a population that is facing more insomnia” said the study’s senior author, Jason Ong, professor of Neurology at Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine. “Purpose in life is something that can be cultivated and enhanced through mindfulness therapies,” he added.
Finding a sense of purpose can add years to your life, according to a study at Canada’s Carleton University. The researchers sorted through a long-term study of six thousand individuals over a fourteen-year period, looking to see if having a direction in life at any age affected longevity. The study concluded that greater purpose in life conferred benefits across lifespan and this was consistent even when other beneficial psychological traits were teased out (“correlation was not causation”). “These findings suggest that there’s something unique about finding a purpose that seems to be leading to greater longevity,” said lead researcher Patrick Hill. When you feel a desire to contribute to the world and have a personal connection to the value of that contribution to the world, you have a powerful health protector, one that is perhaps more potent than many pills.
Ikigai: Your Reason for Living
The Japanese word ikigai can be translated in many ways. One simplified meaning can be “reason for living.” For some this word may have more resonance than “purpose.” The book, Ikigai, The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life, by Hector Garcia and Francesc Miralles details the secret of ikigai and how the villagers of Ogimi, Okinawa (yes, that’s within The Blue Zone® known as the “village of longevity”) live their purpose, along with other helpful tips for readers who want to live a long and happy life. The book points out that there is no word for retirement in the Okinawan dialect, indicating that its culture values hard, yet joyous work in each stage of life. Many of the villagers in Ogimi describe their ikigai in practical words, “I plant my own vegetables and cook them myself. That’s my ikigai.” “Getting together with my friends is my most important ikigai. We all get together here and talk—it’s very important. I always know I’ll see them all here tomorrow, and that’s one of my favorite things in life.” Ikigai can also translate as “the happiness of always being busy” (Garcia and Miralles 2017). Indeed, ikigai infers deep connection and resonance to one’s essential self. It seems related, yet not quite the same as the Sanskrit word dharma, a word that also has multiple meanings. Dharma can mean duty, a right way of living and when applied to an individual can confer “a purpose in life, independent of material pursuits.” Getting to know oneself and what makes one joyful, as well as fulfilled would be of supreme importance in fulfilling dharma and ikigai as we grow older. In our search for meaning, we may discover new passions. Chip Conley, The Modern Elder recommends that a person become an expert in a subject that is interesting to them. He has become one of the world’s experts in festivals, a subject that he finds fun and fascinating. Conley began pursuing this area of expertise by taking to heart the example of the late management guru Peter Drucker, who annually would learn and become an expert in one new subject: Drucker kept up his yearly expansion for over sixty years, long before modern neuroscience would affirm the wisdom of his perennial habit. The brain can indeed rewire and remold itself for the better even as we age, and even though neuroscience hadn’t proved this yet, Drucker just kept on learning, all the way to age ninety-five.
One of the reasons that a deeper connection to inner purpose and ikigai later in life is important at any stage of life, but especially for older adults. When you are in touch with your own inner desire to contribute to the world, this quality balances the softer, vaguer nature of air that characterize the Vata stage of life. Your focus shifts