the immense tension and feelings of guilt that come with having to constantly choose career or family. Most women I knew wanted both, in varying degrees.
Motivated to create, I gathered with a group of friends from various backgrounds to create an opportunity where a woman could have her own business — totally on her own terms, her own schedule, and her own desired paycheck. But we didn’t want to create just any job — we wanted this opportunity to be something truly meaningful, that would fill up a woman’s heart, giving her the deep relational bonds that bring a unique richness to life. In partnership with a talented and established clothing designer, we created “cabi,” a company through which women could become fashion stylists, holding trunk shows with groups of friends, then working with each woman to help her discover her personal style and maximize her wardrobe.
Clothing is not only a product always in demand, but time spent with women developing authentic relationships is in high demand too in our increasingly frenetic world.
Over the last 15 years, we have experienced strong and steady growth — all because our Stylists have experienced the same as they live fulfilling lives as their own bosses. The moments my heart has most overflowed over the last decade and a half are when I hear women, often moms, share with me why their experience with cabi has transformed their life, bringing to it a quality they had no idea they so desperately needed. I hear from women who’d been working a corporate grind that kept them from being a part of their kids’ most important milestones, but then their income through cabi enabled them to quit and be the homeroom mom and the leader of the cheering section on the lacrosse field. I love the stories of moms who had made a decision to stay home with little ones, but found they had lost a part of themselves that they regained and elevated through running their own cabi businesses. Our 85% retention each season fills me with profound joy, because it’s evidence our business really works and the stories I hear over and over reinforce the profound liberation that can be had for a woman in charge of the heat under each of her burners.
Upon meeting Nicole, we were quickly on the same page with many common passions and draw-a-line-in-the-sand moments. We both had waded through our deep longings to bring our God-given brains and talents to a bigger arena, but also wanted to give our unfettered hearts and minds to those we love most. But we connected most deeply on our common desire not just to attain this for ourselves, but to help other women to do the same. This seems to be the space where life has yielded the most fulfillment for both of us.
Nicole’s story is readily seen as one of courage and tenacity. But, much deeper than that, hers is a story of discernment and integrity. And I think it’s actually pretty ironic that a woman devoted to trends would be so steadfast in not following so many of them. And thank goodness. As other bloggers seek to make themselves celebrities, Nicole seeks to make those she serves the heroes. When other media companies are willing to endorse anything when top dollar is offered, Nicole has turned down huge deals to stay true to her ideals. She knows what she believes and what she’s about. And she so graciously shares her wisdom and lessons of experience with others to their benefit.
Nicole, and by extension MomTrends, is that wise person you can’t get enough of in your life. She’s the friend who has the gift of bringing value, thoughtfulness, and realness. She has great taste and a commitment to quality, keeping the bar high for herself and others. She puts relationships first — in her business, at home, and with friends. She endeavors to be fully present wherever she is, eager to contribute the best of herself for the sake of others. Her audience — 100,000+ people strong — comes back regularly because she and her colleagues give them insights about the things that really matter to them.
So whether you’re trying to figure out how you could possibly become a Mom Boss with all the demands that encircle you, or if you’ve been dreaming from time to time and just looking for that last ounce of gumption to launch your own thing, or if you’ve ventured into the world of business building and been burned, you’re in good hands. Nicole will help you muster the confidence to try (or try again). She’ll give you all the right things to think about to get headed on the right path toward a life of calling your own shots. She’s not only lived and breathed the uncertainty of leaving the safety of a steady paycheck for the reward of forging your own way, but she also surrounds herself with women who have done the same. She senses the felt needs of the thousands of women who are part of the MomTrends community, making her a true authority on what the modern mom most deeply desires and how to get there.
Ready to have “work” and “life” no longer in opposition?
You’re in the right place.
Kimberly Inskeep
President of cabi
Here’s how it played out. Stephanie worked for luxury beauty brands for more than a decade. Being a dutiful Gen X feminist, Stephanie returned to work after her 6-month maternity leave (the last three months unpaid) for both baby number one and baby number two.
The scene with one child and work was pretty manageable. The second child stretched her resources thin. Stephanie skulked out of meetings to go pump breast milk in a dimly lit back office and stashed her bags of milk in the community fridge, before heading to the next meeting apologetically late.
She drafted emails to her team and CEO explaining her challenging schedule for the week: Monday she needed to visit a preschool for an interview at 3pm, and Thursday she needed to take her son to the pediatric ophthalmologist at 1:50pm (the only appointment available all month). She felt she had earned the right to be unavailable, but that didn’t make it any easier.
When Stephanie was blessed with her third child, she never returned after maternity leave. Juggling the third and having to start apologizing again for being the type of mom she wanted to be didn’t hold any appeal.
With some savings tucked away, she dropped out for a bit. Then, she had a niggling idea that there should be an in-home service for teaching moms how to prep homemade baby food. The idea was to develop a weeklong course that empowered women to create DIY baby food and stock the fridge with homemade goodness. After informal focus groups with her friends, she fine-tuned the idea and started a baby chef business plan. She could now work around her family’s schedule and market within her built-in network. Six months after launching, she had clients on a waitlist to use her service and a growing brand she loved.
This story is a conglomeration of three of my friends, and I bet it’ll sound really familiar to some of you. I bet you know a mom who’s done something similar and is living her dream, a dream she didn’t even know she had before the kids came along.
Kids have a funny way of changing your dreams. Prepping for your first child is such a strange practice. It’s all about cogitating variables with little or no information. It’s hard to say how you’ll feel after your baby arrives, or what kind of baby you’re going to get. For most of us, there’s a surge of love and protectiveness. We can’t imagine putting anyone else in charge. After waiting 30+ years to find the right person to start a family, or find the time and money to be a single mom, we want to fully embrace the experience.
But the reality of raising a family is that it’s expensive. Someone has to pay for diapers and doctor visits. So work we must. Millennial moms have the right idea. Stories of their unwillingness to compromise and take a job that’s okay instead of awesome are the first step to owning an incredible future. Gen X and Gen Y moms are catching up with this savvy crew, and adopting this attitude of “it has to work for me.”
We can all take a page from this approach to managing our post-kid careers with this attitude; sheepishly having to ask a boss or co-workers for permission to be a great mom stinks. In our hearts, we know we can give