a bright and mesmerizing blue gray and they would turn darker or lighter according to the weather. To look at her face was so lovely. Her lips were full with the inviting softness of a woman. She always looked ten to twelve years younger than her age. Her beauty and grace had continually mesmerized Phillip. Constantly, he referred to her as, “That woman of mine.” Indeed, she was all woman.
Thoughts and pictures of the day began to come to his mind as he recalled how he and Patty received the news of her cancer. Her arm had begun to bother her and caused pain whenever she would use it. The pain continued to escalate and after a few months, she made a doctor’s appointment. They thought it may be a bad case of tennis elbow, but to be safe, and since it had been awhile, a doctor’s visit was in order. Her appointment came the day before their wedding anniversary.
For years, they had hoped to get away for one of their anniversaries, but it never happened. Phillip and Patty hoped to spend the next day alone together. The doctor that examined her did not think it would be anything serious, but to be safe, he sent her that day to the hospital for x-rays and blood test. The following morning, he planned to review them with her in the office.
When she returned in the morning, the doctor stated that the pictures showed a tumor on her elbow and forearm and her blood showed cancer markings. Patty began to cry and tell him he was wrong and she would prove it with another doctor. Realizing how upset she was, immediately the doctor helped her to see one of the top orthopedic doctors in the area.
While driving the car together, Phillip and Patty believed there must be some mistake and prayed as they drove. When they arrived, the doctor took x-rays, reviewed her blood test and confirmed the information. It was cancer. Phillip thought, “What an anniversary! Lord, how can this be?” Everything was changing. He was losing his grip.
While at his bedside, he continued in prayer and felt a power rise within him. It rose from deep inside the center of his being and flooded his mind and spirit. The Holy Spirit began to interact with his spirit. From his mouth, he began to speak softly in a new tongue, a Heavenly language that spoke to the heart of God.
Remembering the times when he first began to preach and minister on a fulltime basis, and at other times, having to take on full time work to support the family and minister on weekends or after work. Patricia was there to encourage him and believed with him for God’s anointing. There were meetings with only a half dozen people in attendance. Still, she stood there to encourage him.
Continually, Patty was there to listen to him. Always, she was there to minister to him and apply love, mercy and understanding, even when she had her own doubts. Through it all, she constantly believed in him and the God they served. There were other times when many came to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. At other meetings, many were filled and experienced a Holy Ghost outpouring. Those times of God’s moving had enabled them to continue and move forward. All the time, God was faithful. Whether with few or many, God demonstrated His power and love.
Most of the time Patty stayed behind for a while and ministered to those who were in the building. It seemed like God had them linger for a short time while Patty made her way to them. Those were some of the most precious moments for Phillip to witness.
He watched her praying with others as she administered the balm of the Holy Ghost and the living Christ upon their lives. During those moments the Spirit of God moved so powerfully. This was her gift; she was a great prayer warrior and intercessor on behalf of those who needed God to move in their lives.
Patty was from a large family of four children. Her parents raised her in a suburban area not far outside the city. Her father was a blue-collar worker and her mother stayed at home raising four children. Their lives seemed normal then but things quickly changed. In the small town her father was quite popular and her mother was the socialite, signs of their problems began to show. Her father became involved in town politics and ran for office in town. His politics required many fundraisers and social events.
Her mother was in charge of her husband’s election. She was very powerful in their political party. With more parties and fundraisers, mother began to drink more than usual. Patty’s father became a heavy drinker as well, but was able somehow to function.
Patty and her brothers and sister attended a local catholic grade school. While on the way home each day they hoped there would be some sense of normalcy, a return to the way things were before her father took office. Patty’s mother moved her children to a small beach town where they barely survived after her parents had divorced.
Mom was still in deep depression and alcoholism and the children found creative ways to eat and get themselves to school. As Patty grew into her teen years, she would leave the house for days or weeks at a time. She tried to escape the darkness that surrounded their home.
Attempting to silence her pain and need for love she experimented with drugs and alcohol. Even at such a young age, she looked for someone who would love and deliver her from the darkness, but had no one, boyfriends who would come and go.
Eventually, she met Phillip. For the first time she had hope and experienced love like never before. She would pour into him, but he too would have his failures and disappointments at times and this added to her pain.
Everything changed when the true love of Patty and Phillip’s life soon arrived. He loved her like no other. He loved her for eternity and gave her mercy, grace and beauty for her ashes. The Lord Jesus Christ became all she would ever need. All of her hope was in Him and He would never fail her.
Phillip continued to pray and cry out to God confessing his mistakes and failures. Since Patty had gone to be with the Lord Phillip had been through some very confusing times. He felt he was making mistakes in judgment and was failing God.
Sometimes he felt empty and without direction. To relieve his pain and enable him to feel complete again, he would grasp at the first opportunity that came his way. Again, Phillip spoke aloud to the Lord with these words. “Lord Jesus, I cry out to you. Father, hear me. Forgive me Lord. I have made so many mistakes.”
Tears began to run down his face as he pressed into God. “Lord, hear me tonight. Heal me tonight. Father, give me new direction and insight. Lord, fill me with your word, love and mercy. I surrender God. I surrender God.”
The only words he sensed in his spirit were “20th Avenue, train and 161st Street, New York City.” Phillip was confused. His mind began to wonder as he thought, “Have I been there before? What does that mean? I’m losing it Father, I don’t know what that means. Lord, do you hear me?” Again, he heard the following, “161st Street, New York City.” Phillip put it out of his mind thinking it was some abstract thought that was interfering in his prayer or something he just could not understand. Then he cried, “God, help me.”
CHAPTER 2
THE BATTLE
Phillip stayed home for much of the time during the year and a half of Patty’s battle with cancer. Her strength, courage and faith during that time were nothing less than God’s grace and love for her during the last few days of her life. One of her last evenings he took her to the bed and lied her down. Patty looked into his eyes and said “Phillip I love you!” He gave her a kiss and told her how much he loved her as he pulled the covers around her and turned out the light.
The following morning her call to him was low, muffled and without strength. He went into her room. Usually, he supported her on one side as she took very small unbalanced steps into the family room where she would try to eat, take her medication and rest for the day.
On that day she looked at him with fear and sorrow. Softly she said, “Phillip, I can’t. Please, I can’t get up today. I can hardly move.” She lied in pain with a haze that settled over her eyes. No longer did he see the bright beautiful glow that beamed from her. The glow had disappeared that had once captivated him. First, Phillip called the doctor and then their children. The doctor reminded him that there was nothing left to do, but to make her as comfortable as possible.
Within a short time, his children arrived. They spent the remaining few days of their mother’s life by her bedside as