Perry Ritthaler

Spy Land Women Play Me


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and walks away. In the rear view mirror Phil watches Catia wave good bye to him.

      Sure enough five minutes pass and Phil comes around the corner fast with his tires squeal. Charlie loves Phil’s new red corvette. And when he entered the car he could smell sex in the air. Charlie exclaims; Pussy you smell like pussy.

      Phil smiled at Charlie and told him she is my snitch girl on highway 41.

      You mean that crack head whore right.

      Hey she has to feed her child and habit and I help her when I can and she lets me know if things change on the street.

      Charlie shakes his head and they are gone in a flash on their way to the Skyway bridge and then on to Tampa. I see your point on staying with woman you know. At least they do not steal everything you own and leave you tied in the hot sun.

      Phil tries to keep a straight face and be empathetic with Charlie but has a hard time hiding his smile and then he bursts out laughing.

      Charlie can still smell pussy so he reaches under the seat and sure enough he finds a pair of soiled ladies underwear. Phil cannot stop laughing at his ivy league friend.

      Charlie tells Phil he is disgusting and wants to throw the smelly underwear out the window; Phil laughs even harder. Charlie is getting pissed off and throws the underwear out the window. Phil is laughing even harder and starts slowing the car down; Charlie looks at him with scorn on his face; why are you slowing down? Phil laughs even harder and tells Charlie we are being pulled over by the police; most likely for littering.

      Charlie is holding his head with his hands and yells “what the fuck else can happen to me”?

      After Phil pulls the corvette to the shoulder of the road; he is watching to see if he recognizes the police officer walking up to the car.

      The office asks Phil; why are you littering on the highway; Phil starts laughing and says you need to talk to my partner that has the underwear issue; not me.

      Charlie is turning red when he tells the lady police officer they are undercover police working with the Spy Land Agency. The police officer asks Charlie; can I see your badge?

      Phil knows Charlie is in deep shit yet he is laughing because he knows Charlie is going to be placed in the back of her police cruiser for impersonation of a police officer if he does not help his partner. Finally Phil tells the police officer Charlie really is a police officer and shows the police woman his badge.

      The officer smiles and tells Charlie she is interested in working undercover in the Spy Land agency.

      The police officer is a beautiful blonde and Charlie cannot help himself so he tells the blonde he would like to meet her sometime for a drink next week and discuss the opportunities available at the Spy Land offices. The sexy blonde is attracted to Charlie and their chemistry is evident to Phil when they exchange cell phone numbers and set a time next Wednesday to meet at the five ‘o club across the street from Sarasota Memorial Hospital. When they finish the police officer tells Charlie we will discuss more underwear issues next time we meet.

      Phil turns on the radio as he watches the police officer sexy ass in his side mirror as she walks back to the police cruiser and immediately tells Charlie he would like to tap that ass.

       http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=on9TXY8kYyk

      Charlie is trying to hide his hard on in his pants with his hand on his lap; as he tries to act professional again and tells Phil she may be a great candidate for undercover work.

      Ten minutes later Charlie can smell weed in the car and when he looks over to Phil he has sparked a joint. Charlie just shakes his head and tells Phil what’s up with that? Phil laughs and tells Charlie I always get high before I drive over the Skyway Bridge. Beside you need to relax and have some fun buddy; here have a hit and lets party; were going to get your new sports car and drinks in Ebor City. Charlie thinks for a minute and then Phil holds the joint in front of Charlie’s face. Charlie smiles and tells Phil just one puff. I have not smoked anything since I was under cover in vice.

      Charlie feels the marijuana hit his system and tells Phil your right that is exactly what I need to unwind right now. This is hood weed…Phil smiles and told Charlie you still know your weed. Saint Petersburg right; you know it pal Martin Luther King Drive just past tenth street.

      I remember; is the little black thin guy with the fucked up arms still dealing in front of the store? Feel is his street name right. What a memory partner.

      Ya he is still peddling dime bags and giving me free weed when I drop by. We can leave the street behind but we can never take the street out of the blood flowing through our veins.

      These guys are the best eyes and ears on the street when it comes to anti-terrorism. Someone shows up strange in the hood they stand out to these guys. They know exactly who is on the street and who is not. Their violence is affiliated to drugs and pimping whores and not connected to politics or foreign policy or religion; and like I tell the street dealers and pimps if you do not want my heat on the street; tell me when the new players enter the street and the game changes to recruiting potential terrorists for terrorism attacks.

      Charlie looks at Phil and says been a long time since I thought of myself as a street dog. The weed brings back memories of when we controlled police intelligence on big parts of the hood.

      Charlie starts laughing and he looks at Phil; remember when I told you about the first time I took my Ivy League girlfriend to the opera in Tampa and I drove through the hood in Saint Pete up Martin King; and every second black street dealer or pimp waved at me when I drove by. My girlfriend was freaking out to begin with by just driving into the hood let alone being popular.

      Both men started laughing and Charlie told Phil; give me another hit of weed.

      The house with the BMW was easy to find and when Charlie saw the car he was over joyed. It was identical to his black BMW. Even the interior had the same black leather seats. The beamer looked like the stereo was upgraded and the car had USB and Bluetooth cell phone connection jacks.

      The only difference was this BMW had an automatic moon roof that opened and that sold Charlie on the ride. When Charlie and Phil looked at the car a beautiful dark skinned woman with a big smile and long strait brunette colored hair came out of the house. Immediately she caught Phil’s eye. Phil smiled and Charlie could see Phil was very interested in the woman selling the BMW. Phil thought he recognized the woman; he thought he might have busted this woman when he worked the streets in Saint Petersburg five years ago; is she the one; was she one of the drug kingpins in the old hood.

      Charlie interrupted the two people locking eyes and asked her if this is her car; she told Charlie it was her husband’s car. When Charlie looked into the garage he could see the back end of new Mercedes 550 SL and new BMW. The woman told Charlie her husband bought a brand new BMW and they were not going to get enough for this one on trade so they are selling it privately.

      Charlie asks the lady for her keys so they can take a test drive; the beautiful woman tells Charlie give me a minute and goes back into the house. When the lady opened the door a pretty long haired well groomed blonde cocker spaniel came through the open door into the yard. Charlie keeps looking through the windows and he is completely mesmerized with the new BMW. Charlie can feel the dog by his leg and ignores the dog. Suddenly the dog starts humping Charlie’s leg. Immediately Charlie tries to flick his leg and knock the dog off his leg. As Charlie flicked his leg the dog flew back into a steel pole and hit its head.

      Phil is laughing and cannot believe what he just saw; and neither can the lady. She screams stop it; and yells; why are you kicking my dog? Charlie tries to explain to the lady the dog was humping his leg when her husband comes out of the house and notices the dog is not moving. Immediately he runs over to dog and picks the beautiful dog up in his arms. Suddenly urine is coming out of the dog all over the man’s shirt.

      The lady screams you killed my dog. You kicked my dog and killed my dog. Both the husband and wife hold the dog between them and start to sob. He is our baby and you murdered our