Winston Churchill

The Essential Winston Churchill Collection


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Miss Trevor exclaimed.

      "Yes, he has left us and gone to Mohair," I said, "bag and baggage. That is the flat truth of it."

      I suppose there is some general rule for calculating beforehand how a young woman is going to act when news of this sort is broken. I had no notion of what Miss Trevor would do. I believe Farrar thought she would faint, for he laid his napkin on the table. She did nothing of the kind, but said simply:

      "How unreliable men are!"

      I fell to guessing what her feelings were; for the life of me I could not tell from her face. I was sorry for Miss Trevor in spite of the fact that she had neglected to ask my advice before falling in love with the Celebrity. I asked her to go canoeing with me. She refused kindly but very firmly.

      It is needless to say that the Celebrity did not come back to the inn, and as far as I could see the desertion was designed, cold-blooded, and complete. Miss Trevor remained out of sight during the day of his departure, and at dinner we noticed traces of a storm about her,--a storm which had come and gone. There was an involuntary hush as she entered the dining-room, for Asquith had been buzzing that afternoon over the episode. And I admired the manner in which she bore her inspection. Already rumors of the cause of Mr. Allen's departure were in active circulation, and I was astonished to learn that he had been seen that day seated upon Indian rock with Miss Thorn herself. This piece of news gave me a feeling of insecurity about people, and about women in particular, that I had never before experienced. After holding the Celebrity up to such unmeasured ridicule as she had done, ridicule not without a seasoning of contempt, it was difficult to believe Miss Thorn so inconsistent as to go alone with him to Indian rock; and she was not ignorant of Miss Trevor's experience. But the fact was attested by trustworthy persons.

      I have often wondered what prompted me to ask Miss Trevor again to go canoeing. To do myself justice, it was no wish of mine to meddle with or pry into her affairs. Neither did I flatter myself that my poor company would be any consolation for that she had lost. I shall not try to analyze my motive. Suffice it to record that she accepted this second invitation, and I did my best to amuse her by relating a few of my experiences at the bar, and I told that memorable story of Farrar throwing O'Meara into the street. We were getting along famously, when we descried another canoe passing us at some distance, and we both recognized the Celebrity at the paddle by the flannel jacket of his college boat club. And Miss Thorn sat in the bow!

      "Do you know anything about that man, Miss Trevor?" I asked abruptly.

      She grew scarlet, but replied:

      "I know that he is a fraud."

      "Anything else?"

      "I can't say that I do; that is, nothing but what he has told me."

      "If you will forgive my curiosity," I said, "what has he told you?"

      "He says he is the author of The Sybarites," she answered, her lip curling, "but of course I do not believe that, now."

      "But that happens to be true," I said, smiling.

      She clapped her hands.

      "I promised him I wouldn't tell," she cried, "but the minute I get back to the inn I shall publish it."

      "No, don't do that just yet," said I.

      "Why not? Of course I shall."

      I had no definite reason, only a vague hope that we should get some better sort of enjoyment out of the disclosure before the summer was over.

      "You see," I said, "he is always getting into scrapes; he is that kind of a man. And it is my humble opinion that he has put his head into a noose this time, for sure. Mr. Allen, of the 'Miles Standish Bicycle Company,' whose name he has borrowed for the occasion, is enough like him in appearance to be his twin brother."

      "He has borrowed another man's name!" she exclaimed; "why, that's stealing!"

      "No, merely kleptomania," I replied; "he wouldn't be the other man if he could. But it has struck me that the real Mr. Allen might turn up here, or some friend of his, and stir things a bit. My advice to you is to keep quiet, and we may have a comedy worth seeing."

      "Well," she remarked, after she had got over a little of her astonishment, "it would be great fun to tell, but I won't if you say so."

      I came to, have a real liking for Miss Trevor. Farrar used to smile when I spoke of this, and I never could induce him to go out with us in the canoe, which we did frequently,--in fact, every day I was at Asquith, except of course Sundays. And we grew to understand each other very well. She looked upon me in the same light as did my other friends,--that of a counsellor-at-law,--and I fell unconsciously into the role of her adviser, in which capacity I was the recipient of many confidences I would have got in no other way. That is, in no other way save one, and in that I had no desire to go, even had it been possible. Miss Trevor was only nineteen, and in her eyes I was at least sixty.

      "See here, Miss Trevor," I said to her one day after we had become more or less intimate, "of course it's none of my business, but you didn't feel very badly after the Celebrity went away, did you?"

      Her reply was frank and rather staggering.

      "Yes, I did. I was engaged to him, you know."

      "Engaged to him! I had no idea he ever got that far," I exclaimed.

      Miss Trevor laughed merrily.

      "It was my fault," she said; "I pinned him down, and he had to propose. There was no way out of it. I don't mind telling you."

      I did not know whether to be flattered or aggrieved by this avowal.

      "You know," she went on, her tone half apologetic, "the day after he came he told me who he was, and I wanted to stop the people we passed and inform them of the lion I was walking with. And I was quite carried away by the honor of his attentions: any girl would have been, you know."

      "I suppose so," I assented.

      "And I had heard and read so much of him, and I doted on his stories, and all that. His heroes are divine, you must admit. And, Mr. Crocker," she concluded with a charming naivety, "I just made up my mind I would have him."

      "Woman proposes, and man disposes," I laughed. "He escaped in spite of you."

      She looked at me queerly.

      "Only a jest," I said hurriedly; "your escape is the one to be thankful for. You might have married him, like the young woman in The Sybarites. You remember, do you not, that the hero of that book sacrifices himself for the lady who adores him, but whom he has ceased to adore?"

      "Yes, I remember," she laughed; "I believe I know that book by heart."

      "Think of the countless girls he must have relieved of their affections before their eyes were opened," I continued with mock gravity. "Think of the charred trail he has left behind him. A man of that sort ought to be put under heavy bonds not to break any more hearts. But a kleptomaniac isn't responsible, you understand. And it isn't worth while to bear any malice."

      "Oh, I don't bear any malice now," she said. "I did at first, naturally. But it all seems very ridiculous now I have had time to think it over. I believe, Mr. Crocker, that I never really cared for him."

      "Simply an idol shattered this time," I suggested, "and not a heart broken."

      "Yes, that's it," said she.

      "I am glad to hear it," said I, much pleased