taken up with what, to him, was the most important of all. He had made up his mind to ask Patience Davis to marry him.
Love is like the measles; it goes hard with a man past fifty, and Captain Perez was severely smitten. The decision just mentioned was not exactly a brand-new one, his mind had been made up for some time, but he lacked the courage to ask the momentous question. Something the lady had said during the first stages of their acquaintance made a great impression on the Captain. She gave it as her opinion that a man who loved a woman should be willing to go through fire and water to win her. Captain Perez went home that night pondering deeply.
"Fire and water!" he mused. "That's a turrible test. But she's a wonderful woman, and would expect it of a feller. I wonder if I could do it; seems 's if I would now, but flesh is weak, and I might flunk, and that would settle it. Fire and water! My! my! that's awful!"
So the Captain delayed and Miss Patience, who had cherished hopes, found need of a good share of the virtue for which she was named.
But one afternoon at the end of the week following that of the funeral, Perez set out for a call upon his intended which he meant should be a decisive one. He had screwed his courage up to the top notch, and as he told Captain Eri afterwards, he meant to "hail her and git his bearin's, if he foundered the next minute."
He found the lady alone, for old Mrs. Mayo had gone with her son, whose name was Abner, to visit a cousin in Harniss, and would not be back until late in the evening. Miss Patience was very glad to have company, and it required no great amount of urging to persuade the infatuated swain to stay to tea. When the meal was over--they washed the dishes together, and the Captain was so nervous that it is a wonder there was a whole plate left--the pair were seated in the parlor. Then said Captain Perez, turning red and hesitating, "Pashy, do you know what a feller told me 'bout you?"
Now, this remark was purely a pleasant fiction, for the Captain was about to undertake a compliment, and was rather afraid to shoulder the entire responsibility.
"No; I'm sure I don't, Perez," replied Miss Davis, smiling sweetly.
"Well, a feller told me you was the best housekeeper in Orham. He said that the man that got you would be lucky."
This was encouraging. Miss Patience colored and simpered a little.
"Land sake!" she exclaimed. "Whoever told you such rubbish as that? Besides," with downcast eyes, "I guess no man would ever want me."
"Oh, I don't know." The Captain moved uneasily in his chair, as if he contemplated hitching it nearer to that occupied by his companion. "I guess there's plenty would be mighty glad to git you. Anyhow, there's--there's one that--that--I cal'late the fog's thick as ever, don't you?"
But Miss Patience didn't mean to give up in this way.
"What was it you was goin' to say?" she asked, by way of giving the bashful one another chance.
"I was goin' to say, Pashy, that--that--I asked if you thought the fog was as thick as ever."
"Oh, dear me! Yes, I s'pose likely 'tis," was the discouraged answer.
"Seems to me I never see such weather for this time of year. The ice is all out of the bay, and there ain't a bit of wind, and it's warm as summer, pretty nigh. Kind of a storm-breeder, I'm afraid."
"Well, I'm glad you're here to keep me comp'ny. I've never been sole alone in this house afore, and I should be dreadful lonesome if you hadn't come." This was offered as a fresh bait.
"Pashy, I've got somethin' I wanted to ask you. Do you think you could--er--er--"
"What, Perez?"
"I wanted to ask you"--the Captain swallowed several times--"to ask you--What in the nation is that?"
"Oh, that's nothin' only the hens squawkin'. Go on!"
"Yes, but hens don't squawk this time of night 'thout they have some reason to. It's that fox come back; that's what 'tis."
Miss Patience, earlier in the evening, had related a harrowing tale of the loss of two of Mrs. Mayo's best Leghorns that had gone to furnish a Sunday meal for a marauding fox. As the said Leghorns were the pride of the old lady's heart, even the impending proposal was driven from Miss Davis' mind.
"Oh, Perez! you don't s'pose 'tis the fox, do you?"
"Yes, MA'AM, I do! Where's the gun?"
"There 'tis, behind the door, but there ain't a mite of shot in the house. Abner's been goin' to fetch some from the store for I don't know how long, but he's always forgot it."
"Never mind. I'll pound the critter with the butt. Come quick, and bring a lamp."
The noise in the henyard continued, and when they opened the door it was louder than ever.
"He's in the henhouse," whispered Miss Patience. "He must have gone in that hole at the side that had the loose board over it."
"All right," murmured the Captain. "You go 'round with the lamp and open the door. That 'll scare him, and I'll stand at the hole and thump him when he comes out."
So, shielding the lamp with her apron, the guardian of Mrs. Mayo's outraged Leghorns tiptoed around to the henhouse door, while Captain Perez, brandishing the gun like a club, took up his stand by the hole at the side.
Without the lamp the darkness was pitchy. The Captain, stooping down to watch, saw something coming out of the hole--something that was alive and moved. He swung the gun above his head, and, bringing it down with all his might, knocked into eternal oblivion the little life remaining in the finest Leghorn rooster.
"Consarn it!" yelled the executioner, stooping and laying his hand on the victim, "I've killed a hen!"
Just then there came a scream from the other side of the henhouse, followed by a crash and the sound of a fall. Running around the corner the alarmed Perez saw his lady-love stretched upon the ground, groaning dismally.
"Great land of Goshen!" he cried. "Pashy, are you hurt?"
"Oh, Perez!" gasped the fallen one. "Oh, Perez!"
This pitiful appeal had such an effect upon the Captain that he dropped upon his knees and, raising Miss Davis' head in his hands, begged her to say she wasn't killed. After some little time she obligingly complied, and then, having regained her breath, explained the situation.
What had happened was this: The fox, having selected his victim the rooster, had rendered it helpless, and was pushing it out of the hole ahead of him. The Captain had struck the rooster just as Miss Patience opened the door, and the fox, seizing this chance of escape, had dodged by the lady, upsetting her as he went.
"Well," she said, laughing, "there's no great harm done. I'm sorry for the rooster, but I guess the fox had fixed him anyway. Oh, my soul and body! look there!"
Perez turned, looked as directed, and saw the henhouse in flames.
The lighted lamp, which Miss Patience had dropped as she fell, lay broken on the floor, and the blazing oil had run in every direction. The flames were making such headway that they both saw there was practically no chance of saving the building. The frightened hens were huddled in the furthest corner, gazing stupidly at the fire.
"Oh, those poor Leghorns!" wailed Miss Patience. "Those hens Mrs. Mayo thought the world of, and left me to look out for. Last thing she asked me was to be sure they was fed. And now they'll be all burned up! What SHALL I do?"
Here the lady began to cry.
"Pashy!" roared the Captain, whom the sight of his charmer's tears had driven almost wild, "don't say another word. I'll save them hens or git cooked along with 'em!"
And turning up his coat collar,