PRESENT, AND FUTURE SELF
One way to begin this journey is by imagining that you have three selves, the most useful of which exists in the ‘here and now.’ However, each self can serve a useful purpose as you strive to become the best human being that you can be. These three selves are your PAST self, your PRESENT self, and your FUTURE self. By allowing your past or future self to dominate your life, or your mind, you may be reducing the potential life-altering power of the present moment.
Your Past Self
First, there is your PAST self. This part of you is made up of memories, some better than others, but all of which are about meaningful experiences in your previous life. Your past self has lived… for better or worse… and died, so to speak. To sum it up even more concisely, it was what it was.
As you consider your past self, regrets may come to mind. You may wish that you had done some things differently, or you may think you should have known better than to make certain choices. However, research indicates that people generally make the choice that they feel is best given what they knew at that time. This is called the hindsight bias in psychology, and it’s an important thing to consider when thinking about your PAST self. Simply put, we know things now that we didn’t know then, and that new information has forever changed the way we view past events.
As we have said before, the point of this mission is to begin where you are with what you have now and work from there. This will require some level of acceptance of what has already occurred. Not that your PAST self was good enough, but that it is good enough for now.
Although your past experiences have come and gone, this does not mean that the past is not important. In fact, the past exerts strong influence on your present thinking, decision-making, and behavior. Past choices or actions may influence the way others act toward you, or the environment in which you currently work and live.
One awesome thing about your PAST self, is that you add to it with each new choice and every new experience. In other words, you can change your PAST self by doing things differently today, for today will soon become yesterday, and your PAST self will continue to evolve as time goes on. While you can’t change what has already happened, you can always create positive meaning for why you have survived this long.
Our past exists in the form of memories, which serve a basic biological purpose: survival. If left unquestioned, our thoughts and beliefs about these memories of the past can become quite troublesome. Therefore, it is important to try and remember that our past does not typically make us do anything. We can always use the present moment, the moment of opportunity, to think and act more appropriately. Before this can be done, however, we must begin where we are by developing awareness of what is, defining what we wish to change, and discovering a motivation to accomplish that change.
The present moment holds the answer to both a hopeful future, and satisfaction with your past.
In summary, though you should always strive to create healthy meaning of your previous life experiences, you can do so only by altering your thinking in the present and making healthy choices today, for that is where all change takes place. Basically, if you wish to be different, then you should do something different right now, with your PRESENT self.
Your Present Self
Let’s get right to the point here… your PRESENT self is a gold mine of opportunity. Regardless of how proud or disappointed you are with your past life; nothing on Earth is more valuable than the present, nor is any resource more powerful. This cannot be overstated.
The present moment holds the answer to both a hopeful future, and satisfaction with your past. On the other hand, it can be a constant source of failure, and regret when used unwisely. Either way, it is up to you, the owner of this resource, to use it as you wish. In this way, you are responsible for your own response to Life.
For example, if you desire for your life to be different, you can use the present moment to read this book, as you are doing right now. Once you are done reading, you can use the present moment to take some action or behave in a way that might lead to the life you desire. Then, after a while, you may spend a present moment appreciating the life that you now have. This is the power of managing your time wisely, and focusing your mental and physical energy on the present, rather than the past and future.
As your life moves on, and you spend each moment in a purposeful and reasonable way, those moments get added on to your past, and you are given another present moment to spend. Though at first, your past may have been regretful, or sad, it becomes more positive with each passing second of time well spent.
Consequently, your vision of the future will also change. New situations will appear more hopeful than they once were, and you will soon look forward to the days ahead. You will gain courage and competence through your efforts to participate more efficiently in life, and you will see this powerful processes of transformation first-hand. Not only has life changed you, as it does for us all, but you have changed life as well. This brings awareness of the fact that if you can change, so too can others. For this is the source of two powerful treasures: patience and hope.
In summary, the present moment is a priceless resource. You should choose to live each moment in whatever way you wish, not to do what you want necessarily, but to respond to Life in a way that promotes happiness and satisfaction for both yourself and others.
What kind of person would you like to be? Are you spending each present moment that way? Think about that one every now and then.
Your Future Self
One interesting thing about the FUTURE is that it is the least real of the three selves. The great visionary Walt Disney once proclaimed, “If you can dream it, you can do it,” but there remains an enormous difference between dreaming and doing.
Until something is done, for instance, it is merely a dream, an imagination, a plan... While we always project some influence on the future, we by no means have full control over it, and it is never ours to own. Therefore, it can never be taken from us. This is very important!
As human beings on a quest for peace of mind or happiness, a healthy understanding of the future is paramount to our resilience. This is primarily valuable when conquering adversity, which just happens to be a meaningful and predictable aspect of life. When an unforeseen tragedy strikes, our imagination can make us feel vulnerable, for we often feel like we have been robbed of our future.
However, our feelings of disappointment are not because Life has failed us, but rather that our imagination and expectations have failed to predict Life accurately. Knowledge of this concept can go a long way toward healing your emotional pain. In fact, there are people who practice a skill known as ‘non-striving,’ which is based on managing expectations of the future, grounding yourself in the present, and then making the most of your current opportunity. As the popular Beetles song goes, do what you can, and then “Let it be.”
In summary, your FUTURE self is a product of your imagination, so don’t cling to it too tightly. Though at times it may be the source of life-saving hope, we must always adapt to our present circumstances in order to survive, and thrive. For we cannot be robbed of something that we do not possess, and the only thing we ever truly possess is the present moment.
OWNERSHIP VS. RESPONSIBILITY
You will find that by living a less possessive, and more transient lifestyle, your emotions will become less intense, and more helpful in guiding you successfully on a path of great happiness. Is it not true that each thing that you now have