Arrested Development. Anthony Moorehead

      

      Copyright © 2015 by Anthony Moorehead

      All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used, reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form whatsoever — including electronic, photocopy, recording — without prior written permission from the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

      All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, King James Version. KJV. Public Domain.

      Published in eBook format by Certa Publishing

      Converted by http://www.eBookIt.com

      ISBN-13: 978-0-9909-4574-1

      Library of Congress Control Number: 2014903548

      Published by

      P.O. Box 2839, Apopka, FL 32704

      Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this book are solely those of the authors and other contributors. These views and opinions do not necessarily represent those of Certa Resources LLC, dba Certa Publishing.

      Dedication

      To Andrea, who has shown me such

      incomparable love and shown me things

      about myself that I needed to know.

      Introduction

      Near the end of our local newspaper there is a weekly column called “Shepherds Corner.” Every week, local church ministers take turns submitting a little write-up for contemplation and inspiration. As is sometimes the case with these columns, I found them to be rather banal, innocuous and nebulous. One pervasive issue that I noticed was never addressed, and which I felt should have been, is that of arrested development. What I wonder is why there are so many people, especially men, who seem to have developed or matured to a certain point, and then stalled.

      For example, I occasionally run into an old acquaintance who will inform me that he/she was married but is now single. “Well, we just grew apart over the years,” is the common explanation for the breakup. However, after further inquiry, I always realize what happened is that one person in the relationship continued to grow or mature, but the other one didn’t, and was left in the dust, so to speak. It’s not that they grew apart, but that one outgrew the other in the way a child outgrows the training wheels on his or her bike. This happens not only with couples, but with long-time friends.

      A few years ago, I did a study of mental illness. Once I finished the academic material, I wanted to do a biographical study to supplement it. The person I chose was Vincent van Gogh. As so much of the biographical matter dealt with his art, I unintentionally was exposed to it. Over time, I inadvertently grew to appreciate its beauty and profoundness. I wondered why I had never before appreciated art of any kind. I could appreciate the beauty of a restored ‘69 T-Bird or a pretty girl, but not a “starry night” or “flowers.”

      “Where is the logic of growing something you can’t eat...isn’t that girl stuff?” How could my inability to appreciate the beauty of God’s creation be considered “manly”? Is it manly to be one-dimensional? Was this not some sort of intimidation indicative of a deficiency in courage; and is not courage rightly acknowledged as an essential of manliness? So, too, these personal contemplations fuelled my interest in the subtleties and causes of arrested development. So as I undertake this subject, I am gladly reminded of the old maxim about how one learns more when one endeavours to teach others.

      As far as submitting an article to the newspaper was concerned, I was told that any article would have to be fewer than 1,400 words. As I could not condense this topic, I decided to go to a book format. Throughout this book, I’ll be using the terms “lack of maturity,” “arrested development” and “one-dimensional” interchangeably, as I address the subject matter. Also to be dealt with are the contrasting terms, “civilized” and “barbarism.” “Civilized” describes one who does not subjugate himself to base urges, but first critiques them on the principles of morality and logic. “Barbarism” is the antithesis of this, describing one who can’t/won’t repress base urges due to possessing a deficient character or a weak mind.

      I have written this book with men a little more in mind than women, as arrested development seems more endemic with those of us who are male. Sadly, however, I would describe the situation among North American woman not as better, than but not quite as bad as the situation with men. So whether you are a man or woman, young or old, and you feel stifled or frustrated by a recurring pattern of stagnation, false starts or failures, then the time is probably right for you to read this book.

      Philosophical Changes

      We’ll be looking at a number of changes which occurred over the last (few) decades that have facilitated or engendered arrested development, both in individuals and collectively. We’ll start with philosophical changes, as they are the most serious; for it is the way that one’s mind perceives life, the world and truth that determines his attitude and behaviour. As George Bernard Shaw once said, “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”

      This belief is a popular favourite among those who would argue against the subject of arrested development even being raised, much less discussed. Our pop culture celebrates and prizes youthfulness, while perceiving agedness as undesirable and dreaded. This is characteristic of our 21st Century Western Civilization. Other societies, removed either in time or geography, have held agedness and the maturity, experience and wisdom that are usually commensurate with it, in high esteem.

      Nobody, and I include myself here, relishes the physical deterioration that comes with aging. Like so many others, I try to keep physically fit and mentally stimulated. Yet there is a difference between this and the mindset of today’s society that celebrates, embraces and aspires to everything redolent of what is deemed youthful. One’s dress, perspective on life, pastimes, taste in music, relations with the opposite sex, etc., which previously distinguished the generations, have now become blurred. The Bon Jovi song, “18 Till I Die,” is the dictum of our day, whereas the admonition to “grow up and act your age” is considered prudish, repressive and anachronistic. These changes in attitudes and expectations have led to a condensing of the generations, resulting in a somewhat indistinct, homogenous soup. “When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child. I thought as a child but when I became a man I put away childish things”¹ is a better point of view.