The Member And The Radical. John Galt

nobody in the town who had a grudge at Mr. Spicer, and would, for a consideration, befriend us in our need.

      There was, to be sure, some hazard in this, as Mr. Gabblon and his familiar were likewise inmates of the same inn, and the landlord was, or pretended to be, reluctant to side with either of the candidates. But Mr. Tough persuaded him to send for a man whom he said he knew, who bore a deadly hatred to Mr. Spicer, and was, moreover, a relation of the Misses Stiches, for whom I had done so much. This man was accordingly brought forward. His name was Isaac Gleaning, an elderly person, and slow of speech, but a dungeon of wit. We received him with familiar kindness; and told him of the misfortune that had overtaken us, by our fatigue constraining us to sleep at Beverington.

      ‘It has,’ said Isaac, ‘been a great misfortune, for your adversaries have got the ears of the mob, and the whole town is in such an uproar that you must not venture to shew your horns in the street.’

      ‘What then,’ said I, ‘is to be done?’

      ‘Well,’ replied Isaac, ‘I have been thinking of that; the players are just now at Physickspring, and they have a very funny fellow among them: could not you send for the manager and the clown, and pay them well to be a mountebank and merry-andrew this evening in the market-place; and get them to throw funny squibs and jibes to the mob, against Mr. Gabblon and his compeers?’

      Mr. Tough rubbed his hands with glee at this suggestion, and no time was lost in sending for the manager: over he came, and we soon privately made a paction with him; whereupon due notice was sent by the bellman through the town, that a great physician from the Athens of the north, with his servant, a learned professor, was to exhibit his skill and lofty tumblings in the market-place.

      By the time that the bellman had proclaimed these extraordinary tidings, all the players, tag, rag, and bob-tail, came over from Physickspring, and set about erecting a stage for their master and the clown in the market-place. They had brought their play-actoring dresses; and they mingled in the crowd with Mr. Gabblon’s clanjamfrey, insomuch that Macbeth king of Scotland, Hamlet the Dane, and Julius Caesar, were visible in the streets.

      Mr. Tough, who was in his way a wag, undertook to instruct Dr. Muckledose and his merry-andrew in what they should do; and the whole town was on such tiptoe of expectation, that Mr. Gabblon and his friends were in a manner deserted – and the multitude gathered in swarms and clusters round the stage, to secure good places to see the performance. In so far the device was successful beyond expectation, for Mr. Gabblon and his coadjutors found themselves obliged to return desjasket to the inn, so much superior were the attractions of the other mountebank.

      It was not, however, in this only that the counselling of old Isaac Gleaning was serviceable; he went about among the friends of Mrs. Stiches and her late husband, and gathered together about twenty of the topping inhabitants, whom I invited to dinner; and Mr. Gabblon and the bodie Probe having engaged themselves to dine with their patron, Mr. Spicer, we had a most jovial party.

      In the meantime it began to spunk out what a liberal man I was; and the whole mob were as pleased when they heard of the great dinner, as if every one had been an invited guest. Besides, when it was known that the players were hired by me to come over to entertain the town after dark, they in a great body came to the fore part of the inn, and gave me their thanks in three most consolatory cheers. There was, however, a small popular error among them, for I had not bargained for more of the players than the manager and the clown; but Mr. Tough, who was a knowing hand, told me not to make two bites of the cherry, but to hire the Mason Lodge, and make the players a compliment for a gratis entertainment of songs and scenes for the edification of the people. This I agreed to do; so that long before the dinner was ready, the wind had changed, and Mr. Tough told me to be of good cheer, for we were sailing before it with a steady breeze.