had him dug up again
and dressed in a different suit
‘suddenly I can understand it,’ my mother said
‘all I can think about is to dig
into that mound of earth and
keep going until I reach your father
until I reach where he is and
lift him up by his shoulders
the irrefutable thereness of him’
3.
3 december 1861
when on that day
he spread out
the gold coins
in payment for the farm
JH Boshof’s
little table
broke
when after that
he signed the purchase contract
laid down the pen
Paul Johannes Delport
knew:
now he was
a Baas
4.
[land] – in brackets untranslatable
they say that Greatgrandmother Helena Susanna Delport
owned [ ] all the land between Kroonstad and Renosterspruit
after her husband died she remained there with two daughters
one of them my grandmother Anna Elisabeth
they say she married a middle-aged fellow Hennie Geldenhuys
[ ] so that the land could be worked [ ]
they say she was a diabetic [ ]
and one day she slipped into a coma
her two daughters came immediately from their respective
households [ ] to prepare for the worst
[ ] they say that within a day or two the first ampoule of insulin
arrived at old Dr Dykman’s consulting room
straight away he rushed out to the farm on the Kroonstad/
Viljoenskroon road to test the new cure
and on the way [ ] [ ] he rode past
the local attorney on the dusty farm road
they say immediately after the first injection
Grandma Lena showed signs of recovery
when she was shakily drinking some water she asked where the ink
on her right middle finger had come from
‘ask your husband’ they said
her daughter, my granny, said
the next morning she went to town to cancel
the will that made over all the land to Stepgrandfather Hennie
[ ] [ ] sixteen years later she died [ ]
Grandpa Hennie had usufruct until his death
after a year with his new wife [ ] he moved to town [ ]
he said Grandma Lenie cooks soap in the yard at night they said
5.
a story
we grew up together on the farm, we two were the same
early in the morning it was still dark then I could see:
he was waiting by the trees, they were like aloe trees, he was waiting
then we would play there we shot little birds, we rode the horses
we would move move down to the stream till the old lady
with the bonnet came out and called the way Matjama was
I was the same we ate porridge from one bowl one o’clock
then Matjama ate from his plate then I ate from my plate
when he didn’t eat nicely then the old lady brought him outside
then he sat next to me then we ate together I knew Matjama
well well like I knew myself if a white child
came and he wanted to play then we didn’t hear what he was saying
Matjama also Matjama also didn’t understand
white children’s language till he went to school
then we were apart till then we were
the same, the same then he went past us
then another baas said: Baas Willem is looking for you
there in Senekal at the café so I waited for him there
but I was scared I wouldn’t remember him properly
what I remembered well was the little scar
Matjama had a scar above his eye from the accident
when we were small then I saw a man standing there
and suddenly I said loud right behind him:
‘Hii, dumela Matjama!’ then I saw no, the man’s head jerked
then he laughed and then I saw the scar then he said
he was going to get married on a farm and I must come with him
we must stay together we must be together forever
so I came so we stayed together until today, this very day
I knew him like I knew myself when he came out of the house
I could see if he was tearful or cross but one thing
he didn’t like squabbles he looked away when there was fighting
and when he spoke then tears would fall from your eyes
in the farmyard I looked after the milking, sick calves, chickens
every year the henhouse was full of chicks that had to get ants to eat
pruning the trees the grapes laying drains and digging them open
I slaughtered sheep, cattle, pigs I can build with sandstone
ironstone bricks I can put in a ceiling wooden floors
I can put on a roof I can drive all the years I drove you to school
went to fetch flour if there was something I didn’t know how to do
I watched, I watched then I saw then I could do it
one thing that makes me unhappy
is that the work I can do doesn’t have any papers
I can do all these things but there are no papers to show it
now I’m not the Hendrik Sengapane Nakedi that I really am
I want to have some land a small piece I want to know: it’s mine this
is where I will stay this is where I will build to be in my own place
plant vegetables and trees apricot peach and a shade tree
Matjama’s mother taught me a person
must have a shade tree but one thing for sure: I won’t leave Matjama
I will only leave Matjama on the day that he dies or I