dead than just away at school.
Everyone expected to talk to Eden, too, of course. Hannah told them that she’d gone off by herself two hours before and was incommunicado.
“Why am I not surprised?” her mother sighed. “Well, when she re-appears, have her call us. Okay?”
After hanging up with her folks, Hannah stuck a Post-it note on the bedroom door:
E—
Gone to the student union for dinner. Call home when you get this.
8:15
The student union was in a big, modern glass-and-steel building that included a coffee shop, Campus Grounds, and a 7-Eleven type of market, the Grub Hub. Hannah had a feeling both spots would be her salvation in the months ahead. The union was like one huge bar—with two pool tables, dart boards, pinball and video game machines, and a couple of strategically located TVs. It was also air-conditioned, thank God. On the wall behind the counter-bar was a chalkboard menu of Italian sodas, juice drinks, and coffee specialties. Exposed pipes, beams, and ducts ran along the ceiling, and concrete support posts were staggered every twenty feet or so. There were about twenty-five people—mostly girls—eating and drinking at the tables. It didn’t seem like much of a crowd for such a large space. Hannah guessed most of them were freshmen, like her. She’d hoped against hope that Rachel and Alden might be among the diners, but she didn’t see them anywhere. Some students sat in couples or groups, making Hannah wonder how these people knew each other when they’d all just arrived today. Were they all from the same high school?
Or maybe they just had roommates who hadn’t deserted them.
Several students ate alone, staring at their smartphones so that they wouldn’t look utterly pathetic. Hannah figured that was what she’d have to do.
She sat down at a table close to the entrance so that, if Eden showed up, she’d find her easily. The laminated handwritten menu had eight food selections. Hannah decided on the Cobb salad, and then glanced around for a waitperson. Or did they even have servers? Maybe she was supposed to go up to the counter and order her stupid dinner.
She hated this.
She should have sat near someone else that was alone—and then she could have asked what the hell she was supposed to do to get some dinner in this dump. She might have struck up a friendship, too, if only a temporary one.
She noticed a couple of girls, a chubby blonde and a pretty brunette, about three tables over. They both wore Our Lady of the Cove T-shirts, which Hannah thought was kind of pathetic for any freshman to do on her first day here. But they looked friendly enough, and they smiled in her direction. So Hannah smiled back. Then the brunette got to her feet, waved, and signaled like she wanted her to come over and join them.
Hannah was so grateful. Even if they were total dipshits, at least they were nice enough to invite her over. She waved back and started to stand—just as another girl walked past her. The other girl wore an Our Lady of the Cove T-shirt, too.
Standing there for a moment, Hannah watched the new arrival join her friends at the other table. The blonde whispered something to her two friends, and they all laughed.
Hannah shrank back into her chair. Had they noticed her making an ass out of herself? Was that why they were giggling? She gazed down at the tabletop and started to count to herself. In thirty seconds, she’d get up, walk out, and find something to eat at the Grub Hub. She didn’t care if it was a stale hot dog that had been on one of those rotisserie things since Tuesday—just as long as she didn’t have to sit here alone.
After twenty-three seconds, she became aware of someone standing beside her table. Hannah figured it was the waitperson, and she hesitated before looking up.
“Please tell me that you haven’t ordered yet, because the food here really sucks.”
Rachel was smiling down at her.
Hannah sprung to her feet. She almost wanted to hug her.
Ten minutes later, they were headed to town, walking through a residential section with beautiful, big old homes. The tree-lined street ran alongside a bluff overlooking the beach. The sky was darkening and ominous over Lake Michigan. It looked like a storm was rolling in. Hannah could feel the wind picking up and the temperature dropping.
Rachel explained that she’d seen her note to Eden on the bedroom door. She apologized for running off earlier. Alden had needed to pick up a pair of prescription eyeglasses at Target in Lake Bluff. “It didn’t dawn on us until we got there,” Rachel said. “We should have invited you along. You probably need stuff for your room or groceries. Anyway, we can still pick up anything you need while we’re here in town tonight.”
Hannah asked where Alden was. With Riley out of the picture—if not completely, then at least until a week from Saturday—she couldn’t help wondering about Alden.
Rachel shrugged. “Beats me. I dropped him off at his dorm about fifteen minutes ago.”
As they approached the town, Hannah spotted her first firefly. She wanted to chase it, cup it in her hands, and watch it light up. Rachel was amused. “God, you’re like a little kid! It’s just a lightning bug.”
“Well, they don’t have them in Seattle,” she replied, out of breath. She gave up on the chase. There was something so magical about the glowing insect—and this moment with her cool, sophisticated “big sister.” Just minutes ago, she’d been so alone and depressed. But Rachel had come to her rescue, and they were on their way to have dinner together. A part of her was actually glad Eden had disappeared. It would have been a real drag to have her half-sister along.
In a cozy Italian restaurant called Bellini’s, they ate the most delicious pizza Hannah had ever tasted. She’d never seen pizza cut in squares before, but apparently, that was how they did it in Chicago.
They were just finishing up dinner when Hannah worked Alden into the conversation again. She finally had the nerve to ask: “So—are you guys like—dating or anything?”
“Me and Alden?” Rachel laughed. “God, no. He’s practically like my brother. We grew up together. His mother was a maid in our house, an Irish girl, and single. She died from a brain tumor about ten years ago. But Alden stayed on—with the house staff looking after him, well, the house staff and me. And now he’s looking after me. At least, that’s what my father thinks about the setup. Alden started here last year. My parents are paying for it.” She picked up a square of pizza, but then seemed to change her mind about eating it and put it back. “Anyway, no, Alden and I aren’t dating. Why do you ask? If you’re interested in him, you’re shit out of luck. Alden will deny it until he’s purple in the face, but I’m ninety-nine percent sure he’s gay as a Christmas goose. Or he’s at least a Kinsey five.”
“Oh, I wasn’t interested,” Hannah lied. She tried to hide her disappointment and fiddled with a breadstick. She should have known. He seemed too good to be true.
Rachel sipped her Diet Coke. “I didn’t want to ask you this in front of Alden earlier. But how is it with your dad? I mean, I’ve read such terrible things about him screwing around all the time, but he really can’t be that awful.”
Making a face, Hannah squirmed in her chair. “I used to think I was so lucky. Most of my friends, their parents are divorced, or if their parents are still together, they can’t stand each other. But my mom and dad seemed happy, always hugging and kissing, very lovey-dovey, almost nauseatingly so. As far as fathers go, my dad seemed pretty cool. I mean, all my girlfriends thought so. Then the shit hit the fan, and I found out he was this sleazy serial cheater. And so did everyone else, because the whole thing became a media sensation. Anyway, while all that was happening, he was laid up in the hospital with major injuries—”
Rachel nodded. “Yeah, I read that he was shot and crashed his car.”
“As angry as I was, I kind of felt sorry for him, too,” Hannah admitted. “But I couldn’t really forgive him, y’know? I don’t think I ever will.