Fern Michaels

Comfort And Joy


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see those itsy-bitsy little numbers. A lot. And who’s paying for this taxi?” Angie asked as it pulled up.

      Josh stepped up to the plate. “Eagle’s,” he said smartly.

      “Tell him to take us to your house. Then he can take me and my mother home. She is going to be so…so…”

      “Pissed?” Josh asked, howling with laughter. “My old man is going to go through the roof. I need to move out and get my own place. I think he needs me, and that’s why he likes me living with him. I bet your mother feels the same way. They’re old. Old people think like that.”

      They got into the cab and Josh gave the driver his address.

      “Nah, it’s all a game to keep us in line. Those two are more independent than either one of us. If you had your own place, I could visit you.”

      Whoa. Josh leaned over and kissed her ruby-red lips. At least he thought they were ruby red. He didn’t care if they were ruby red or purple.

      “You’re a good kisser,” Angie said a long time later. “I think the driver wants you to pay him. Are we at your house? Time does fly when you’re having fun, doesn’t it? Yesireee, you are a good kisser.”

      “Damn straight I am. A good kisser. Not because I had…have a lot of practice,” Josh said, handing the driver a twenty-dollar bill for the five-minute ride. “Keep the change,” he said magnanimously.

      “Wait for me, mister, I have to pick up my mother.”

      Walking up the driveway, Josh stopped and reached for Angie’s arm. “Should we have a story? You know, why we’re so uncaring, so negligent, so…”

      “Drunk?”

      “Egg-zactly,” Josh said, roaring with laughter.

      “No defense is the best defense. I don’t really care. Do you care, Josh?”

      “I don’t think I do. Tomorrow I might.”

      Josh was about to open the kitchen door when it swung open. He looked up to see Eva Bradford glaring at him. His father’s face defied description. A sappy expression on his face, Josh said, “Good evening, everybody.” He made a low, sweeping bow. Not to be outdone, Angie did the same thing and almost fell on her face.

      “They’re both drunk,” Angus said.

      Josh straightened his jacket and looked over at Angie. “They’re worried about us while they’ve been here…noodling…canoodling…Oh, shit, messing around. Hrumph!” he sniffed. “Your chariot awaits, Mrs. Bradford. It’s a taxi.”

      “Mom!” Angie looked properly horrified. “I knew it! I knew it! You two…You lied to me. You were doing what he said…noodling around,” she said, pointing to Josh.

      “We were not. You’re inebriated, Angie. Shame on you!”

      “Joshua, go to your room.”

      “Why should I? No! I’m moving out and Angie is going to come and visit me. When I move to England, she’s coming to visit me there, too. So, Pop, what do you have to say to that?”

      “Talk to me when you’re sober, and I will have plenty to say. These ladies need to go home right now. You need to go to bed, Joshua.”

      Josh looked over at Angie and said, “He only calls me Joshua when he’s really mad. Come along, fair lady, I always see my dates home. Do you want me to stay with you until I find an apartment?”

      “Sure,” Angie said agreeably. “Mom can stay here. Win-win. Works for everybody. I think I’m going to be sick.”

      Eva fixed her angry gaze on Josh, and said, “Young man, I am holding you personally responsible for my daughter’s condition. Do something!”

      Josh stepped up to the plate for the second time that evening. “And I and I alone accept that responsibility.” He offered up a second sweeping bow and fell over, toppling one of the kitchen chairs. “The meter is running,” he said as Angie bolted for the kitchen door.

      “Do something, Angus!” Eva hissed.

      “It’s your daughter who’s…Well, she’s…”

      “Your son got my daughter drunk. Don’t deny it.”

      From his position on the floor Josh said, “No, no, she got that way all by herself. She had so many ideas.” A moment later he was sound asleep on the kitchen floor.

      Angus shrugged. Eva did her best not to laugh.

      Angie came back and looked down at Josh. “He’s not…dead, is he?”

      “I’m thinking tomorrow morning he might wish he was,” Angus said.

      Angie sat down on the floor next to Josh. “Oh, I had so many ideas. Josh liked all my ideas.” She untangled herself and laid her head on Josh’s stomach.

      “I say we just leave them here,” Eva said. “I’ll let the taxi driver go. You get some blankets and pillows.”

      “Then what?” Angus asked.

      “Do you want me to draw you a map, Angus? Do you want to make your son out to be a liar? We’re going to canoodle.”

      “Oh!” Angus wondered if Eva picked up on the anxiety in his voice.

      And then she was back in the kitchen, a wicked gleam in her eyes.

      Chapter Five

      The sun was just making its way to the horizon when Josh stirred on the kitchen floor. He felt like a ton of bricks was sitting on top of his chest. Somehow, he managed to crank open one eye. A nanosecond later, his other eye flew open. He gasped. The woman wrapped around his torso stirred and mumbled something he couldn’t quite hear. Josh moved. Then the woman moved and rolled over onto the floor. She was awake in an instant, looking around as she tried to figure out where she was and why she was lying on a strange kitchen floor. A tortured groan escaped her lips.

      Josh groaned in sync as he struggled to sit up. His eyes were as wild-looking as his hair, which was standing on end. Angie didn’t look much better.

      “Ah, did we…? What I mean is…Do you remember?” he finished lamely.

      Angie rubbed her temples in an attempt to ease the pounding in her head. “No, I don’t think, and…No, I don’t know,” she said just as lamely.

      “Why are we…? We slept on the floor?” Josh asked this as though sleeping on the floor was one of the Seven Wonders of the World. “Why did we do that?” he asked as he got to his feet. He stretched out a long arm to pull Angie to her feet.

      “Maybe because we were drunk?” It was a question and a statement.

      Josh looked down at the floor to see the pillows and blankets. He cursed under his breath as he pointed them out to Angie. She looked away in embarrassment. “Are you sure we didn’t…?”

      “I think I would remember that,” Josh said, walking over to the coffeepot. He thought his head was going to pound right off his neck. He filled the pot, measured coffee, and pressed a button. “Do you want some orange juice?”

      “I didn’t even brush my teeth. It feels like something is growing in my mouth,” Angie said. “No on the orange juice. Oh, God, we left our cars at the Jade Pagoda. Now I have to walk there to get it. Damn. I look like someone who just…”

      “Had a wild night of sex?” Josh asked.

      “Stop saying that. We didn’t…I’m almost…No, I’m sure we didn’t. We never should have had that plum wine after drinking beer. This is all your fault, Josh. You said we couldn’t insult Mr. Win Lee by refusing the complimentary wine.”

      “You guzzled half that carafe all by yourself. You even got sick. I did not get sick. I only pretended to drink the wine.”