other: not both.’
Mickey Thompson got on.
‘All aboard, fifty-two?’ said the trolley.
‘All aboard,’ said Purvis, and the trolley clacketty-rattled off up the corridor.
‘Phew,’ said Mickey Thompson.
‘He’s a one, isn’t he?’ whispered Purvis.
‘Hmph,’ said Mickey Thompson. ‘Are you sure about this?’
‘Of course,’ said Purvis.
‘Only we seem to be going quite fast,’ said Mickey Thompson.
CRACK! went the trolley, clattering around a corner.
‘It’s fine,’ said Purvis.
CLACK! went the trolley, clattering around another corner.
‘PURVIS!’ shouted Mickey Thompson.
‘HOLD ON!’
shouted
Purvis.
‘THREE TWELVETY TEN!’
shouted the trolley, as they barrelled down a corridor.
‘NOTHINGY NINE SIX!’
‘What’s the matter with it?’ said Mickey Thompson.
‘I think it’s over-excited,’ said Purvis. ‘I’ll see if I can have a word.’
He crept to the edge of the shelf and peered out.
‘Err, excuse me,’ called Purvis.
‘SEVENTY MILLIONTY NOTHINGY NOUGHT ONE!’
‘Hello?’ called Purvis.
‘FIFFERTYFIFFERTYTWOOOOOOOOOOOO?’ hooted the trolley.
‘Yes, it’s me,’ said Purvis. ‘Err, we were just wondering. . . ’
‘WHAT?’ shouted the trolley.
‘When’s the next stop, please?’ asked Purvis.
‘FIVE TWO FIVE TWO FIVE TWO FIVE TWO FIVE!’ shouted the trolley.
Purvis went back in.
‘It’s no good,’ he said. ‘He’s gone bonkers.’
‘What are we going to do?’ wailed Mickey Thompson.
‘I’m thinking,’ said Purvis.
‘Think faster,’ said Mickey Thompson.
‘WHA-OOO!’ yelled the trolley, hurtling.
‘I’M ON FIRE!’
‘WHAT?!’ shrieked Mickey Thompson.
‘Oh, shoosh,’ said Purvis. ‘It’s just a figure of speech.’
‘I think I’m going to be sick,’ said Mickey Thompson.
‘DON’T YOU BE SICK IN ME,’shouted the trolley, crashing through some swing doors.
‘STAIRS OR LIFT, FIFTY TWO?’
‘LIFT!’ yelled Purvis.
‘HERE WE COME,’ shouted the trolley. ‘OPEN UP, YOU!’
‘PING!’ went the lift, just in time. They shot inside and rattled to a halt.
‘Well, really,’ said the lift.
The mice plopped out of the trolley and lay on the lift floor, puffing.
‘I’m fast, I am,’ said the trolley.
‘Where’s your postman?’ said the lift.
‘Never mind the postman,’ said the trolley.
‘Well you didn’t ought to go racketing around loose like that,’ said the lift. ‘You’ll cause an accident.’
‘Ah, shut up,’ said the trolley.
‘Ooh, I say,’ said the lift. ‘Don’t you take that tone of voice with me.’
CLATTER! went the trolley.
WHOOSH! went the lift. ‘Think you’re fast?’ it said. ‘I’ll give you fast.’
‘EEEEEP!’ went the mice.
CLACK!
went the trolley.
WHOOSH! went the lift.
‘I think I’m going to be sick,’ said Mickey Thompson.
‘Oo-err,’ said the lift. ‘Not in here, lovey, please. See what you’ve done to him?’ it said to the trolley. ‘Gone all green, he has.’
‘Me?’ said the trolley. ‘You, more like; all that WHOOSHing.’
‘Whatever were you thinking of, you mice?’ said the lift. ‘You don’t want to go riding about in that clacketty old thing.’
‘Oh-ho!’ said the trolley. ‘Look who’s talking!’
‘He’s bonkers, you know,’ whispered the lift.
CLATTER!
went the trolley.
‘Err, the thing is,’ said Purvis, quickly, ‘we wanted to see the not-Christmas tree.’
‘Are you sure?’ said the lift.
‘Yes, please,’ said Purvis. ‘So could you take us there?’
‘YEAH! COME ON!’ shouted the trolley. ‘TEN. NINE.’
‘Oh leave off, do,’ said the lift. ‘You’re putting me in a tither.’
‘EIGHT. SEVEN,’ shouted the trolley.
‘Oo-err,’ juddered the lift.
‘What is it?’ said Purvis.
‘He’s upset me workings,’ said the lift, juddering harder. ‘Hold on!’
‘OHH
HHHH!’
shouted
everyone
as they
shot
downwards
very fast.
‘AAAAGGHH!’
shouted
everyone
as
they shot
upwards
very fast.
‘E E E E E E EEE !’
shouted
everyone
as
they
p
l