don’t you shut it and go do something useful?”
“Why so grumpy?”
I shoot her a glare that could incinerate ice, but she ignores me with a wink, walking down the beach to snap some more shots. Scowling, I reach into my backpack for a bottle of water. The wind threatens to rip some of my papers from the top of the bag, and I just manage to grab hold of an escaping flyer that I’d tucked in there the day before. Taking a swig of water, I study the flyer fluttering beneath my fingertips on the sand. It’s from the San Diego Ocean Foundation for a marine conservancy drive event.
I should have been involved in something like this from the day I stepped onto land, but I’ve been so caught up in escaping who I am that I’ve ignored my real responsibilities. Instead, without a care in the world, I’ve enjoyed everything human youth had to offer...while my people paid the price for my freedom. At least now, I can do something worthwhile. I can try to ensure that those who are left in Waterfell have a future.
“Hey, Jenna,” I yell out. “Can I talk to you about something?”
She stops snapping pics and walks over to sit next to me cross-legged on the sand. “Sure. What’s up?”
I don’t need her help, but it would be fun to do it with someone else. “Check this out. There’s an ocean conservancy drive happening in a few weeks, and I want to get involved.”
“Since when are you interested in ocean conservancy?” Jenna’s words aren’t sarcastic, they’re curious, but I can’t help the immediate pang in my belly. She’s right. I haven’t been, when it should have been the one thing that I was interested in. My father had said to stay away, and that’s what I’ve done, playing hockey and pretending to be human here on land. I’ve shirked every responsibility ever given to me and forgotten about the ocean. It’s the only home the Aquarathi have, and all I’ve done is turn my back on it...and on my people. And who knows what Ehmora is planning, now that my father is out of the picture.
“I’m interested now,” I say.
“But what about hockey and practice? It’s not like you have a ton of free time.”
“It won’t interfere, I promise.” I stare at her. “I really need to do this, Jenna. It’s important to me. And I’d be so happy if you wanted to do it with me, but I totally understand if you have too many things on your plate.” I pause. “But I need to.”
“How come?”
“It’s kind of a family thing. Complicated.”
Jenna shoots me a look. She knows that I don’t really talk about my family so she doesn’t press the issue. Her expression turns thoughtful. “Okay, I’m in.”
I can’t believe how easily she gives her friendship, incorporating my needs with hers as if she doesn’t even question whether I’m worthy of it. It’s humbling. For about the five hundredth time, I feel like I want to return the favor and tell her everything. Confide the truth of who I am and everything else that I’ve hidden from her for so many years. The Nerissa she knows is a mere shadow of who I really am. But I can’t—revealing who we are to humans is against all of our laws, an offense punishable by death, even for me.
“Text me the details, okay?” she says, and stands, dusting the sand off her shorts. “Oh, here comes your boyfriend. I’m going for a walk.”
“No, wait—” I begin, but it’s too late as a long shadow falls over me and I look up, shading my eyes with one hand. Lo dumps his board facedown on the sand and collapses next to me, breathing hard. He runs a hand through his damp, windblown hair. His cheeks are red and his eyes are glowing. Every part of me comes alive in response to his nearness.
“Hey,” he says, his dark eyes searching. “Why’d you come in?”
“Tired,” I say tersely.
“Me, too,” he says, touching the side of his head. “Got worked on a big one, though.”
“Sorry.” I manage to keep my voice cool, detached.
“You okay?”
“Fine.”
“Okay,” he says with a puzzled look, but falls silent.
Lo is trouble. I can feel it in the way my pulse races at the mere presence of him, the way my breath takes on a shaky cadence. I have to pull it together and end this growing infatuation, which is all it really is—a crush.
I take a deep breath. “Look, I know I said I’d go with you to the Crab Shack, but I can’t. It’s...complicated.” Complicated is beginning to define my life.
Lo shoots me a look, as if he can see right through me. “What are you afraid of?”
“I don’t know what you mean,” I say.
“Yes, you do.” My answering flush is immediate. I hate the way he can see right through my bluster. It’s a perceptiveness I usually see in Jenna, and while it’s a cool trait with her, it’s maddening with him. I take a deep breath.
“Lo,” I say. “I don’t want to play any games with you. I mean, I’m not interested in dating anyone. I can’t.”
“Why?”
His quiet directness is disconcerting. “Because I have too many things going on—school, hockey, family—to get involved with anyone.” I’m aware that my reasoning is flimsy but I can’t seem to put two coherent thoughts together when he’s staring at me with that knowing look in his eyes.
“Nerissa—” the delicious way he says my name sends a shiver through my entire body from tip to toe “—I like you. You’re interesting. I want to get to know you. And I want to know the real reason that you don’t like me.”
“I don’t,” I blurt out, ignoring the fact that he just admitted he liked me. “I mean, I do like you fine as a person.” I like you too much, that’s the problem.
Once more, I’m struck by how different he is from other boys. No boy I know at Dover, or any other school, would flat-out up and admit they liked a girl, or lay out perfectly logical reasons on why they should get to know each other. His quiet self-assurance throws me.
“So what’s the problem, then? For us to hang out? As friends.”
“Cara thinks you have enough friends.” I don’t even know where the words come from, but they’re out of my mouth before I can stop them. Lo’s expression doesn’t change but I can see the slow lightening in his eyes. It’s worse than an actual smile.
“She’s just someone who befriended the new guy.”
The way he says it makes me feel awful, like I’m some sort of pariah who thinks she’s too good for everyone else. Maybe I used to be like that, but I’m not anymore, and certainly nothing like Cara, who has her own hidden agendas. But it’s the opening I need. So even though my body feels otherwise, I stand, grabbing my board and bag.
“Good. Then you don’t need me,” I say softly. Lo’s reaction takes me by surprise. This time, he smiles and lounges back on his elbows, stretching his sand-crusted legs out in front of him. I frown, recognizing his grin as the same one from earlier when we’d been competing for the wave. “That’s not a challenge, if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“Okay.”
“Okay, what?” I say, exasperated.
“Not a challenge, I get it,” he says, and nods over my shoulder. “Here comes your warden.”
I glance down the beach to see Speio walking toward us from the water with the familiar stormy expression on his face. But instead of being angry, this time I’m grateful for the interruption.
“Catch you later,” I say to Lo, and walk toward Speio.
“Definitely,” Lo says.
The