war’s over, Graham, and it’s time to stop fighting.”
A look of pain crossed his face, and although she used to know him better than anybody, she couldn’t understand that look or what had caused it. Was it her complaint about his seriousness? She couldn’t imagine that. Was he remembering the war, the suffering?
When he dropped his gaze to the floor as if unable to look at her, she knew. This powerful man, this war hero, had his mind on the past—their past—and she’d caused his pain with her careless words: You used to be fun. Her subconscious, underlying message spoke her truth: he wasn’t fun anymore.
But was that true? Considering how he’d spent the past eight years, was it fair of her to compare him to the carefree boy who’d proposed marriage to her?
She twisted the ring on her right hand. She’d give Mama’s best pearl if only she could take back those hurtful words. She wished she hadn’t said them, wished they weren’t true, wished she could somehow comfort him as she’d managed to comfort Betsy. She opened her mouth to say so, but he lifted one hand and shook his head.
“I can’t think about it tonight. I wasn’t this tired even after Chickamauga.” He strode to her side and took Betsy from her. “Let’s talk about it later. I’m going to put her in her crib.”
When he’d disappeared up the stairs, Ellie leashed Sugar and started for home, the mist of regret heavier in her mind than the settling fog.
The next afternoon, Ellie straightened the piece of wire she’d found in the stable. She tied a rag, one of Lilah May’s old, frayed red kerchiefs, onto one end. Then she set the other end on the windowsill and weighted it down with Pride and Prejudice, flying the kerchief out her window like a flag.
Dear God, I’m putting this flag out here like Gideon’s fleece. Despite what she’d said to Graham, she realized during her sleepless night that she didn’t know whether Leonard Fitzwald had told her the truth about their debt. She needed advice—and help in searching Uncle Amos’s library at Magnolia Grove.
If only her uncle would get well again, she could tell him about her conversation with Leonard and get his opinion. But since Doctor Pritchert told her uncle to avoid the exertion of business, Ellie was on her own. Besides, Uncle Amos had sounded so confused this morning, he couldn’t have helped her anyway.
Her childhood Sunday school teacher used to say Gideon sinned by putting out his fleece to seek an answer from God. But Ellie didn’t see it that way. Gideon needed to know whether God was going to deliver his enemies into his hands. And in a way, that’s what Ellie needed to know too. She’d never thought of Leonard as an enemy before, but after last night, she wasn’t sure.
“If Graham sees the red flag and comes over by the time I’m ready to leave, I’ll ask him to go with me to Magnolia Grove. If he doesn’t, I’ll go alone,” she whispered to the Lord. “Above all else, don’t let me get outside Your will.”
Ten minutes later, she went to the dining room and poured herself a glass of sugar water. She sipped it as she watched out the window for a sign of Graham. If he hadn’t come by the time she finished her drink, she’d have to go.
When her drink was gone, she took her glass to the kitchen and then returned to the center hall. She tied on her plain, wide-brimmed straw hat in front of the mirror at the back door. It was time to go, and Graham hadn’t arrived. With a pang of disappointment, she pulled on her gloves and gave Sugar a goodbye pat. “I’m riding Buttercup today, so you can’t come along. We’ll take the landau tomorrow.”
At least tomorrow she’d have company, even if it was only her dog.
Pushing down the self-pity that wanted to rise up in her, she headed out the door. If God didn’t want her to have help, that meant He would do the helping. Ellie learned long ago not to complain about that. If she didn’t want to marry, she had to do things alone. Hard things. Hard work. Hard decisions.
She stepped into the stable, where Roman led Buttercup out of her stall, saddled and ready to go.
His eager service made Ellie smile. She wasn’t alone, after all. “Roman, I hope our fortunes will soon be restored so we can hire a gardener. Then you can do only what you love—care for a stable full of horses.”
“I’ll pray with you ’bout that.” The handsome older man held the reins in his mahogany-colored hand while Ellie mounted.
She spoke to Buttercup, and the horse started toward Commerce Street. As they turned onto Washington and passed the south windows, Sugar looked out and watched them go. Her throaty warbling let Ellie know she didn’t want to be left at home.
Before Ellie reached Pearl Street, Graham raced toward her on Dixie. “I thought we were having a picnic. That’s what the red flag means, right?”
He remembered. And he came. She didn’t recall ever being so glad to see him.
Thank You, God.
She reined in Buttercup and smiled at Graham. “I didn’t think you were coming.”
“I came as soon as I saw the signal.”
“I had a basket packed.”
“Where is it?”
“In the kitchen.”
“What’s in it?”
“A whole chicken, biscuits and honey, and watermelon.”
He spun Dixie around and cantered toward Ellie’s house. “I’ve waited eight years for Lilah May’s fried chicken.”
Ellie laughed at his serious tone. She nudged Buttercup, urging her to follow. “I have an ulterior motive.”
He groaned. “Not another plan...”
“Not like that. I couldn’t find any loan agreements in this house, so I need to search Uncle Amos’s library at Magnolia Grove.” She didn’t want to ruin the day by telling him she was in big trouble if she did owe Leonard thirty thousand dollars in two weeks. “I thought we could have a picnic and then look through the library together.”
“That’s not so bad. At least it doesn’t involve dancing.”
When they reached the stables again, Lilah May came out, their lunch in her hand and a grin on her face. “Goin’ on a picnic and forgot the basket. That’s love if I ever saw it.”
Love. Her maid thought she and Graham were in love. Ellie’s hand shot up and covered her mouth.
Lilah May handed the basket to Graham. As he settled it in front of him, Ellie noticed something she’d never seen before—his face and neck turning red.
Graham—embarrassed? Over the mention of love. It wasn’t about her, that much she knew, so why had he colored so?
Then a distressing thought hit her. Did he already have a girl? Was that why he fought against their pretend courtship?
She should have thought of that. She’d assumed, without even thinking of it, that he was unattached. Somewhere, a woman could be waiting for him to return. Even—oh, my word—a wife!
No wonder he didn’t want all those girls around—or want her at his house last night. It all made sense now.
But if he was married, or even courting a girl, they had no business riding out to Magnolia Grove together. “Graham, wait...”
He swung around in the saddle. “What for? I’m starving.”
“We need to talk.”
“Magnolia Grove is a twenty-minute ride. We’ll have plenty of time to talk.”
Ellie looked to Lilah May for help, but she merely shooed them away with a wave of her hand and headed back inside the house.
“We