felt as if he’d found his home. That disturbed him deep inside because he hadn’t realized that he’d been searching for one until this very moment.
Shelby didn’t want to wake up. She saw the sun shining across the bed, but the feel of Hayden’s arms around her was too good to give up. Even to the reality of morning. How many times had she dreamed of him holding her this way only to wake alone once again?
But she wasn’t one to hide from reality. And she knew this morning he was real, not a figment of her hungry soul. But this time she had to deal with her own guilty conscience. Deal with the fact that she had gone behind his back to seduce him with the things he loved.
Her thighs and breasts were pleasantly sore from last night. She was a little scared at the intensity of their lovemaking.
She’d enjoyed herself, no doubt about that, but he’d made her feel vulnerable. She didn’t like that. She was a business owner—not exactly an occupation for wimps. She was used to dealing with her fears head-on and would deal the same way with this one, too.
Rolling over and opening one eye, she found herself nose-to-nose with Hayden. His eyes were wide open and the most arrogant male grin split his face.
“What are you smiling about?”
“You, here with me,” he said. Leaning down, he kissed her.
It was the slow kind of kiss that didn’t put any pressures or demands for more. She felt precious to him. It made her realize how vulnerable she was once again to Hayden. Before, she hadn’t really loved him, but this time he was so much more to her than a wealthy man.
Now she was starting to know him, to know that he was constantly going. A moving ball of energy. And that he liked to bet on anything and everything.
She tunneled her fingers through his chest hair, caressing his warm, bare skin. She wanted to snuggle closer. To sink into him until they were just one person and then didn’t have to face the day apart.
He lifted his head. “We have to get back. I can’t believe I left the casino this long without checking in.”
He propped himself up on the headboard and she blushed as she remembered how he’d made her hold on to it until she came in his arms.
He saw her color and shook his head, tugging her into his arms. “Thank you.”
“For…?”
“Last night. It was…incredible, Shel. I wish our first time had been like that.”
“I don’t.”
“Really? I’ve always regretted that I took you too quickly that first time.”
“I don’t. You were perfect, Hayden. And I don’t think we could have handled last night before. We were both…”
“Both what?”
“I can’t speak for you but I was pretending to be someone else. Hoping you wouldn’t notice.”
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why were you pretending?”
“Because I wanted a rich boy to marry me and normally you wouldn’t have looked twice at the real me.”
“Yes, I would have,” he said.
“You might have looked but you wouldn’t have proposed. I know that firsthand.”
“Because of your mom?”
“Yeah. She’s never been married.”
“Where is she now?”
“Arizona.”
“Do you keep in touch?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“She’s part of what I was running from when I left, Hayden.”
“Aren’t you ready to stop running?” he asked.
She couldn’t answer that. She thought about her mom a lot. Her mother wrote her a letter once a month and Shelby never wrote her back, but she read those letters over and over and regretted that she’d been so ashamed of herself and the woman who raised her that…sometimes she didn’t like herself very much.
Hayden was right, but Shelby didn’t know how to bridge the gap she’d forced between herself and her mom. He hugged her closer, his hand coming to rest over hers. He twined their fingers together and then brought her hand to his lips and kissed her.
“Yes, it is time to stop running,” she answered finally. “That’s part of why I came back here.”
“I know you didn’t come back because of money.”
“Well, I kind of did. The Chimera location is going to make Bêcheur d’Or a lot of money.”
“That’s business.”
“Yes, it is.”
The covers slipped lower on his hips. God, she could stare at him all day. She noticed a tattoo on the top of his left thigh. “What’s this?”
He covered the tattoo with his hand. “Nothing.”
“No secrets, remember?”
He sighed and she realized that though she thought she was coming to know Hayden, he was still a mystery.
He slid his hand away. She bent closer looking at his tattoo. It was a knight’s fist, gripping a bloody heart.
Instantly she knew that he’d gotten it after she’d left. She realized that she’d made a huge mistake. But she couldn’t decide if sleeping with Hayden last night had been a bigger one than leaving him all those years ago.
Seven
Hayden strode through the main casino two nights later feeling like a gambler riding a streak of luck that just wouldn’t quit. Shelby had shown up at the children’s facility yesterday afternoon and had given him a run for his money on the rock wall. They’d had a lot of fun and she’d gotten the girls together to compete against the boys.
Last night he’d taken her up in his old Cessna, the same one he’d had when they were dating. They’d flown out over Hoover Dam and Shelby had mentioned that she’d been thinking about going to Arizona to see her mom. Hayden felt as if this time he was really getting to know Shelby.
The sounds of the bells and whistles of the slots and the rolling of the roulette wheel always excited him, but seeing Shelby standing at a blackjack table, holding one of those small Bêcheur d’Or gold bags, excited him even more.
She still wouldn’t move into his penthouse but he contented himself with the fact that she denied him little else. Like tonight. He wanted to show her his world. Wanted her to experience what life was like in the casino and though she said she wasn’t much on gambling, here she was. Waiting for him.
She glanced up as he approached, smiling sweetly at him, and it was the sweetness that wrapped around him, stopping him in his tracks mentally. This thing with Shelby was the kind of risk he never took outside of gambling. But he couldn’t stop it.
He approached the table and noticed that Rodney, one of his best dealers and longest employees, was the dealer. “Evening, Rodney. You treating my lady nicely?”
“I am, sir, but the cards…not so much.”
Shelby laughed a tinkling sound that lit the dark places of his soul and made him want to keep her happy always. “I am the worst player ever. Isn’t that right, Rodney?”
He shook his head. “I’ve seen worse.”
“I think he’s just being nice.”
“Maybe you need some expert help,” Hayden said. He took some chips from his pocket and placed them on the table in front of