over. “What do you want on your pizza?” Jake asked.
“Everything,” Caley said. “But no meat.”
“Then that’s not everything,” he said.
“It’s all the vegetables,” Caley said.
“Are olives vegetables? What about anchovies?”
“No anchovies—anchovies are fish. Green and black olives, green peppers, roasted red peppers, mushrooms and spinach.”
Jake wrinkled his nose, then repeated the order to Jasmine. “And then I’d like another pizza with pepperoni and mushrooms.”
“Are you going to eat that here?” Jasmine asked.
“Can you have them deliver it?” Jake asked.
Her smiled dissolved. “Sure. Where to?”
“Northlake Inn. Room 312,” Jake said. He pulled out his wallet and handed her enough for the bill and a nice tip, then took Caley’s hand and headed back toward the door. Jake could feel Jasmine’s eyes on him as they left, but he didn’t care. He was with Caley now and, as far as he was concerned, he was off the market.
“So, obviously you two dated.”
“We did. Last summer. And into the fall for a while. But she lives here and I was in Chicago, so we didn’t see much of each other.”
“She seems nice,” Caley said.
Jake smiled. “I don’t want to see her. I like seeing you.”
“But I don’t live here.”
“Maybe we’ll have to find a way to work around that,” Jake suggested. He knew he was taking a risk, but it was time for her to know where he stood. He’d grown too attached to Caley to not wonder if she felt the same way.
When they reached the street, Caley turned to him. “Jake, we both know how this is supposed to end. I have a job in New York. I have people who depend on me. I can’t move back here. If I did, I’d lose everything I worked so hard to build.”
“I know,” Jake said, nodding. He glanced down at her hands, her fingers so small and delicate in his. So now he knew. He’d suspected when it came down to choices, she’d choose her life on the East Coast. But the last few days, he’d felt they’d come close to considering a future together. And it was silly to think that she was the one who would have to relocate. He could work out of New York just as easily as Chicago.
But Jake wouldn’t make that offer until he knew for sure what the future held. “Why don’t you head back to the inn,” he said. “I’m going to pick up some beer and a bottle of wine. I’ll meet you there.”
As he watched her leave, he felt the distance between them growing—not just physically but emotionally. She’d begun to pull away now, as if she were preparing herself to leave. He’d seen her do it time and time again in the past, when she’d been hurt or afraid of her feelings for him. Her offense had always been a stubborn defense, choosing to stand back and shut him out rather than admit she might feel something deeper.
But this time, Jake saw her retreat as a good sign. She was fighting her feelings for him and that must mean that she felt something. It wasn’t much to go on, but Jake was satisfied that it was enough.
CALEY MUNCHED ON A PIECE of pizza as she flipped through the channels. She stopped at a Star Trek rerun and frowned. She didn’t watch much television and she couldn’t believe that they were still showing Star Trek. The program had to be fifteen years old. “This is still on? Remember how you used to make me watch this? I hated this show.”
“You loved this show,” Jake said, popping open a can of beer and pointing to the screen.
She shook her head. “No, I didn’t. It was too confusing. And that Captain Picard was so … bald.”
“Then why did you come over and watch it with me every day?”
Caley picked a mushroom off her pizza, then threw it at him. “Duh. Why do you think? Because I was hoping that one day you might be overcome with desire for me and throw me down on the sofa and kiss me.” She took another bite of her pizza. “I had a very active fantasy life.”
“Did you ever see us together?” Jake asked.
“All the time,” she replied.
“No, I mean together. For good. Forever.”
Caley had felt his unease all evening. She sensed he had questions to ask but she’d tried to keep the conversation from getting too serious. In truth, she was as confused today as she had been on the day she arrived back in North Lake. Only, she was confused about different things.
Over the past few days, she’d realized that Jeff Winslow had been right. There was a certain charm to living a small-town life. And she hadn’t missed the stress of work at all. The panic attacks that had been plaguing her had disappeared and she was finally sleeping through the night without waking up in a cold sweat, wondering what she might have forgotten to do at work. The only time she felt them return was when her cell phone rang. Like Pavlov’s dog, she responded to the sound of the Mozart ditty. She even reprogrammed the ring to see if a new tune might be easier to take. But it didn’t matter. The moment she saw a work number come up on the caller ID, she started to get queasy and fluttery and a little woozy.
She’d been happy here with Jake and though she didn’t want it to end, Caley knew that, for all practical purposes, a future with him would be difficult. They had both built careers in big cities. Those cities just happened to be seven hundred miles apart. It seemed like a long way. But then, it was only a few hours by plane. She flew back and forth to L.A. at least once a month to see a client there and thought nothing of it.
Conceivably, if she wanted to see him, she could call Jake at lunchtime and be in Chicago by supper. It was possible and with every minute that passed, Caley was thinking more and more about what could be instead of what might have been.
“I should probably go check on Sam and Emma,” Jake said. “Do you want to stay here or come with me?”
“I can come with you. I do want to see how Emma is doing. I feel a little guilty leaving her out there all alone. I mean, she’s with Sam, but I think she might be pretty angry that we just left them there.”
She picked up the pizza box and set it on the table near the window, then turned to Jake. He was stretched out on the bed, wearing just his jeans and boxers. His feet were bare, as was his chest, and he looked so completely at home, as if they’d been together for years and this was just an ordinary night.
“What?” he said, glancing over at her.
“Nothing,” Caley said. She grabbed her sweater and tugged it on over her head. Then she looked at him again. Slowly, she crossed the room and ran her hand through his messy hair. “I like this. It doesn’t have to be all passion and excitement,” she said. “Although I do enjoy that.”
“You want passion and excitement?” Jake asked. “I can do that. I just thought you were hungry.”
“No,” Caley said. “I mean, I love it when we … you know.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“But this is nice, too. It’s comfortable. I’ve never really had this with a man. It feels real. We can be together and there’s no pressure.”
“Now you’re starting to make me feel bad,” Jake teased. “I don’t want to be boring.”
“You’re not.”
Jake got to his feet and grabbed his shirt, pulling it on. “You’re right. I’m not. Come on, I’ll show you some excitement.”
“We’re not having sex in a public place,” Caley warned.
“No. We’ll save that for later. I’m going to show you some real small-town