fade. You’ll go months without one, but then they’re back. Anything can trigger them.”
“Not comforting news.”
“It’s a fact, Izzy. They exist. They’ll always shake you. It’s not how you handle what comes in the night that’s important. It’s what you do the next morning. And the morning after that.”
“You read that somewhere?”
“I have some personal experience with nightmares.”
Somehow, that didn’t surprise her. “Want to talk about them?”
“No.”
“Typical guy.”
“That’s me.”
Her mouth curved into a smile. Then she remembered that he’d been a complete bastard and that she hated him so much that she was planning to learn how to beat the crap out of him. They shouldn’t be getting along.
But right now, with the heat from his body relaxing her and his arm around her like a shield, she couldn’t find it in herself to be angry anymore.
“How did you know I was having the dream?” she asked quietly. “Was I screaming?”
“Nothing that dramatic. I was checking the house before going to bed. You were restless.”
“You came into my room?”
“Yeah. Just like a stalker.”
“What about my right to privacy?”
“What about the pain you give me in my ass?”
That startled a laugh out of her. “I bug you?”
“I can’t describe how much.”
“Good.”
“Yeah. It’s good. Now go to sleep. I’ll stay right here.”
“The lights are on.”
“They won’t bother me.”
“Okay.” She closed her eyes and the fear returned. “It was the explosion. I was walking down an inside hallway. There wasn’t any warning. In the dream, I know it’s coming and I’m still caught off guard. Then I’m flying through the air. It’s so bright and loud. I can’t control what’s happening, I can’t scream or stop it. Then I’m falling into the fire and I wake up on fire.”
“No. You wake up safe. There’s no fire, Izzy.”
She turned toward him and stared intently at his face. Not that she could bring him into focus. “It feels like there’s fire.”
“I know.” He brushed her hair off her forehead. “If Aaron catches us like this, we’re going to have some explaining to do.”
The corners of her mouth twitched. “He’ll just be bitter because I got there first. He wants you.”
Nick winced. “Please don’t say that.”
“Can’t handle the pressure?”
“It’s late. Aren’t you getting tired? Don’t you want to close your eyes and go to sleep?”
It was late. “You can go. I don’t need you to stay.” The second he left, she would sit by the window because that would feel safer.
“Me? I’m not moving. I’m too comfortable.”
“Liar.”
“Not me. I always tell the truth. Ask anyone.”
She waited, but he didn’t move. Eventually, she put her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her. She was aware of his long, hard body next to hers, but that didn’t matter. Being safe was a whole lot more important than anything else.
“Go to sleep, Izzy. I’ll be right here. You won’t have any more bad dreams tonight.”
“Promise?”
“Yeah. I promise.”
IZZY WOKE to sunlight flooding her room. She stretched and rolled over, only to realize she was alone. Nick had left sometime in the night. Or maybe he’d waited until morning. Either way, he’d stayed with her until she’d relaxed enough to let go of the nightmare.
She got out of bed and crossed to the window. She was going home today. Back to live with Lexi, she supposed. To that window seat that had become her entire world. Back to waiting…for something that would never happen.
There was no miracle coming. No puff of magic that would make her see again. She either took the risk and had the surgery, or she had to learn to deal. Since getting out of the hospital, she’d been waiting for a gift from heaven.
“Get real,” she told herself. Heaven was busy with people a lot worse off than her. Nick was right. She had resources, a family, a life.
She showered and made her way to the barn. She had no idea what time it was, but didn’t bump into anyone else. She found the cupboard with the washing supplies and put everything on the bench next to it. She still had trouble deciding which bottle held the soap, then realized she could open them and figure it out by smell.
The barn was a little more daunting. She hit the light switch before entering, then tried to remember how far down she’d gone before.
“Jackson? Are you here, honey? Jackson?”
She heard a soft snort on her left and reached toward the sound. A horse dropped his head over the gate. She patted him.
“I have no idea who you are,” she said, “but you’re getting a bath. How does that sound?”
She led him outside and secured him to the post. Then she turned on the water and went to work.
Washing a horse was slow work to begin with. The animals were large and they had to be rinsed well. But doing everything by touch made the task that much longer. Izzy figured she got as much water on herself as on Jackson, but that was okay. She would get better with practice.
She’d just started rinsing the far side, when she heard someone say, “The breakfast bell rang ten minutes ago.”
She spun toward the sound and was rewarded with a yelp, followed by swearing. She turned the water off at the nozzle.
“Morning,” she said, trying not to grin. “Did I get you?”
“Yes,” Nick said through obviously clenched teeth. “Water’s cold.”
“I know. Sorry. You startled me.”
“Apparently. You coming in for breakfast?”
“As soon as I finish. Um, is this Jackson?”
“Uh-huh.”
She heard Nick brushing down his jeans. With luck, he was completely soaked.
“Okay. I’ll just be a couple of minutes.” She bit her lower lip.
Late yesterday afternoon, she’d been convinced she only wanted to go home. That there was nothing here on the ranch for her. Now she wasn’t so sure.
She wanted to stay. She wanted to try to…something. Adjust, maybe. But her Titan pride made it impossible to ask.
She stared at the shape that was Nick, not sure how to get her point across. “Nick, I…”
“Yeah. It’s fine. After breakfast, you can start on the other horses.”
“Okay.” She smiled. “Thanks.”
Then she turned on the hose and heard him yelp again.
“Dammit, Izzy. You’re going to make me regret having you around, aren’t you?”
She turned off the water and giggled. “Now why would you think that?”
CHAPTER