had every right to be upset as he pulled out his new cell phone. “My old cell phone was stolen.” And he wasn’t about to share the details of that story. At the time, he’d been lucky to have escaped with a mild concussion and a few cracked ribs. His cell phone and wallet had been the least of his worries. “I know it’s not an excuse, but I didn’t get your messages. See? New phone, new number.”
She stared at him with wide, solemn blue eyes. “You had a right to know about the babies, but please understand that, other than some financial support, I don’t expect anything from you.”
He scowled, annoyed with the way the conversation was going. “What do you mean? I’m their father.”
Her unblinking gaze bored into his. “Can you honestly tell me you’re here to stay this time? That you’ll be here for me and the babies no matter what? You’ll never need to take another unexpected personal leave of absence?”
For long moments he debated lying to her and reassuring her he was here to stay. But his life wasn’t his own. He had responsibilities. If his mother called, he’d have to drop everything to leave again.
And he couldn’t lie to Alyssa, even by omission.
Not about this.
“No, I can’t tell you that I won’t ever leave Cedar Bluff. But if I do have to leave, I’ll make sure to let you know first. And you can rest assured that, no matter what happens, I have every intention of being there to help support you and the twins. Emotionally support them, as well as financially.”
Her eyes widened in surprise, as if she hadn’t expected him to say that. “But you made it clear you weren’t interested in a serious relationship,” she protested, her eyes full of barely hidden anxiety.
“So did you,” he shot back.
She stared at him, unable to refute his claim. They’d blithely jumped into an intimate relationship, never considering the possible consequences of their actions.
“Obviously things have changed, for both of us,” Jadon continued. “I plan to be a part of my children’s lives, so you’d better get used to the idea.” She wasn’t going to get rid of him that easily. “I’ll give you some space now, because I don’t want to cause you any more stress while you’re supposed to be resting, but you can be certain I’ll be back later.”
She didn’t utter a word as he turned and walked away.
CHAPTER THREE
ALYSSA had no idea bed rest could be so boring. It seemed all she could think about were the things she couldn’t do. The next twenty-four hours crawled by painfully slowly. Daytime television was pathetic. She searched and searched for some Christmas-themed programs but didn’t find a single one. Where were all the wonderful Christmas shows she’d remembered watching as a kid? Didn’t they air them anymore?
She hoped the hospital carolers would come back. Or maybe the music channel on the television? She picked up the remote and turned it on, taking a deep breath when the lyrical sound of Christmas music filled the air.
She closed her eyes and hummed along, trying not to dwell on the four hospital walls holding her captive.
The problem with having nothing to do was that her thoughts kept going back to Jadon. He hadn’t made good on his threat to return, and she wasn’t certain if she was relieved by the lapse or disappointed. She tried to convince herself his absence was for the best. She needed time to get over the shock of knowing he was back. Somehow, she simply couldn’t believe he’d meant what he’d said.
He wanted to be a part of their children’s lives? Supporting them emotionally as well as financially? What exactly did that mean?
Was he envisioning some sort of joint custody agreement? Dual parenting? The thought of giving up her babies on alternate weekends made her feel sick.
So she tried not to think about their dubious future at all. Especially since Jadon hadn’t been able to promise he wouldn’t leave again. Maybe his definition of emotional support was different from hers. Once he understood the amount of work twins entailed, he’d likely disappear for good, just like her father had. She needed to keep her heart safe. No way did she want to be hurt like that again.
Several of her coworkers stopped by to see her, giving the occasional break in the monotony. Susan, her coworker in the ED, brought her a beautiful red poinsettia plant, which provided a cheerful, festive feeling to her room. Seth had popped in very briefly to assure her that Ben was indeed doing fine and that he’d be discharged the following morning.
Alyssa could only hope an early morning discharge was in her future, too.
As she hadn’t done a thing all day except lie in bed watching television, sleep didn’t come easily. She spent far too much time thinking of Jadon.
Remembering their last night together.
The way they’d made love, urgently, as if knowing, instinctively, the heat and passion between them couldn’t last.
The desolation she’d felt once she’d realized he was gone.
At the time, she’d told herself she was better off without him. They’d met during a very complicated trauma resuscitation, two victims of a multiple motorvehicle crash. From the very beginning, she’d realized Jadon was an excellent physician. She’d admired the way he kept calm in a crisis, yet treated the distraught families with dignity and respect. His charisma was like a beacon, drawing her near. She’d warned herself to ignore the attraction she felt for him, but it seemed like every time she glanced up at him, he was staring at her.
When their fingers had touched that first time, pure electricity had sizzled between them.
Eventually, they weren’t able to stay away from each other. He asked her to come home with him after a late shift they’d shared, and against her better judgment she agreed.
She knew better than to fall for a handsome guy like Jadon. Her mother had harped on the inability of handsome men to remain faithful. Alyssa had seen a few of the early photographs of her parents together, realizing her father had indeed been a good-looking guy.
And he’d left a week before her third birthday, leaving her mother to raise a young daughter all alone.
All her life Alyssa had tried to avoid ending up like her mother. Her mother had been forced to go from job to job, always seeking better pay, which hadn’t been easy since she didn’t have a college degree or any specialty training. It wasn’t her mother’s fault that she’d spent more time working, or obsessing about working, than paying attention to Alyssa.
So Alyssa had vowed to make something of her life. To never be dependent on any man. She’d taken out student loans to attend college, to have a career as an ED nurse so she’d never have to worry about not having a steady, reliable job.
She’d also avoided being hurt by men, like her mother had been, keeping her relationships lighthearted and fun. Especially if the guy she was with seemed like he wasn’t exactly father material.
Like Jadon. Yet here she was, pregnant and alone. With twins, which put a big crimp in her plan to stay independent.
And as much as she wanted to blame Jadon, she knew the truth of the matter was that she had no one to blame for her situation but herself.
Jadon was exhausted; he’d been called in early for his night shift because the ED had been flooded with trauma calls. He hadn’t slept very well in the first place, and being called in early meant he’d missed going back up to L & D to check on Alyssa. During the night, he’d had a few minutes of downtime, but obviously then wasn’t the appropriate time to wake her.
When he finished his shift at eight-thirty in the morning, he took a few minutes to swing by to see how she was doing.
He helped himself to more coffee, double-strength to keep the fatigue at bay. With less than three hours of sleep, and a physically demanding endless stream of patients,