her and she’ll go home with me until you’re ready to take her,” Talia said. “Unless you have other plans.”
“Plans? I’m just trying to get a grip on my new status.”
She glanced up with worry in her big eyes.
“You’re worrying about me taking her from you,” he said.
She shook her head. “I’m worrying you won’t take her and the state will get her.”
He caught Talia’s arm lightly, instantly having that startling awareness from the physical contact. He heard her breath catch and realized she felt something, too. Why did sparks fly between them when they didn’t even know each other? Looking intently at her, he released her just as quickly. Standing so close, he was acutely aware of her while he tried to focus on the problem.
“Let’s settle that one right now. I have the DNA and Hattie is my baby. I’m not giving my baby to the state to try to place in foster homes or wherever they can find. I’ll take Hattie and you’ll get to see her. You have my promise,” he said, emotions tearing at him because he was making a huge commitment that he didn’t even know if he could live up to. He had been tossed into fatherhood abruptly and it brought back memories of his baby boy and of his wife, of being in love and happy and filled with plans for a future that vanished in a crushing blow when their private plane went down in a storm. He hadn’t ever expected to raise a little girl he didn’t even know, a child born to a mother he was with for only a few hours. As he looked down into Talia’s wide, frightened eyes, his insides churned and he wondered if he could possibly keep the promise he was making to her. This promise was monumental and a life-changer. Along with tremendous responsibility, it brought heartache. Every time he looked at this child he’d be reminded of what he had lost in the past.
As she searched his gaze, tears filled Talia’s eyes. She brushed away her tears hastily. “You really mean that, don’t you?” she asked softly.
“Yes, I do,” he said. “Don’t cry. I’ll take Hattie because she’s my child and you’ll get to see her. We’ll figure something out.”
“I wanted so badly to adopt her and be her mother. My attorney said I’d have to go through the state to apply.” Shaking her head, Talia turned away, carrying the baby to the window and talking softly to her. He let her go so she could get herself pulled together while he tried to calm his own nerves.
A few minutes later he glanced around and saw Talia was standing a few feet behind him, holding out Hattie to place her in his arms. As their hands brushed, he felt a frisson of electricity shoot up his arm. He inhaled her perfume, an enticing scent. As he took Hattie, his gaze met Talia’s, and if he let himself, he could drown in the blue depths of her eyes.
His heart pounding, he forced himself to step back slightly, and his gaze was captured by the baby, who stared at him with huge eyes.
She was soft, warm and smelled of soap and lotion. She wore a white blouse and a pink jumper.
“Hi, Hattie,” he said quietly.
She touched a button on his shirt and then touched his chin.
He felt little fingers moving over the stubble on his chin while he gazed at her as solemnly as she looked at him. She ran her tiny fingers over his face. “I’ll contact the state human services and let them know that I have my baby. I think that will take her name off any list they have.”
“It will as soon as you’ve notified them that you’re taking her permanently. My attorney checked and I can’t just come calling and then take her home with me. I have a friend who is an attorney and he’s been keeping up with this. When you step in and actually take care of her and she lives with you, they have to back off and leave you alone unless they get a complaint about the way she’s being raised, which they won’t. Since Madeline’s death, Hattie hasn’t had any family except me. There’s no one else who cares about her except the women at the day care. They think she’s sweet and adorable.”
“So except for those ladies, you’re her whole world. We’ll definitely have to work something out so you can come see her.”
Her blue eyes widened and he saw hope blossom in them. Then she turned them to the child he held.
“Hattie, this is your daddy. Daddy,” she repeated distinctly and looked at Nick. He looked down at her, and for a few seconds all he could think about was Talia and how close she stood, how tempting she smelled. She looked back at Hattie. “Daddy,” Talia repeated.
“Da,” Hattie said, running her fingers on Nick’s jaw again.
“God love the little children,” Nick said softly and turned away. Emotions tore at him when she ran her tiny fingers over his chin because Hattie made him think about Artie. He would never hear Artie say “Daddy,” and it hurt. He missed his son and felt conflicted over the little girl in his arms. He pulled out his handkerchief and wiped away tears, trying to get a better grip on his emotions.
“Do you want me to take her?” Talia asked.
“No. I’ll pull myself together. Sometimes it just hits me out of the blue and I miss Artie.”
“That’s the way I’m going to feel about Hattie,” Talia said so softly, he didn’t think she was even talking to him.
He heard her and knew she was right, and that disturbed him. “At least you can come visit and I’ll let her visit you,” he said, making another commitment that might be difficult.
Hattie’s little fingers ran over his cheek, her mouth turned down, and she looked worried by his tears. He smiled at her and she stared for a few seconds and then smiled.
“Da,” she repeated. He looked into her big green eyes and they stared at each other. Could he be a real dad to her? Would he grow to love her the way he had loved Artie? Right now, he felt at a loss and he hurt. Guilt rocked him for missing Artie each time he looked at Hattie. It wasn’t right, but he couldn’t help himself because he longed for his little son. Hattie was a little girl he didn’t know.
“One thing’s for sure,” he said. “She’s related to me. She has the Duncan hair and eyes. I’m glad I have the DNA results, but this child is a Duncan.”
Holding Hattie, Nick walked across the room with her. He wasn’t sure what to do next. At a store specializing in babies, he had bought a small stuffed pink bunny for Hattie. The bunny was in a gift sack with pink tissue paper covering it and he had placed it on a game table.
He picked up the small sack and held it in front of her. “Hattie, this is for you from me. It’s your present,” he said quietly.
She looked up at him and then down at the sack. He held it closer in front of her. “This is for you.”
She looked at the sack and at him in uncertainty, but then she pulled one of the pieces of tissue paper. As it came out of the sack, Nick smiled encouragement. “A bunny.”
“Bun,” she repeated and retrieved the small pink stuffed rabbit. He took the sack from her to set it on a table. “Mine,” she said, hugging the bunny, making him smile.
“That was sweet, Nick,” Talia said softly. “She likes you. She hasn’t protested going to you or wanted me to take her. That’s good.”
He walked to Talia and held out Hattie. “I’ll give her to you.”
“Of course,” she said, taking Hattie from him, their hands and arms brushing and bringing that same electric awareness of touching Talia that he felt each time they had contact. He glanced at her as he stood so close and she looked up, their gazes meeting. For another moment he was more aware of Talia than of Hattie. He couldn’t understand the physical attraction, especially at a time when they both were torn up emotionally.
Moving away, he didn’t want to pursue the feelings she stirred. His life was tangled enough already and he didn’t need one more emotional pull. He suspected she wasn’t any more enthused about the sparks flying