Rob took another bite of toast and swallowed. ‘Can you do that?’
I nodded. ‘Of course.’
We sat for a few more moments.
‘Rob, I think I need to try and get over to Mags’ place today. It’s obvious I’m still not going to get home but I can’t stay here again–’
‘Why not?’ He wasn’t tetchy. He was just asking.
‘Well, because I’m sure you’ve got plenty of things to do and I just…’ have no idea what I’m trying to say.
‘Look out there, Izz. I don’t think anyone’s going to be doing much of anything today apart from staying in and keeping warm. Which is a plan that sounds pretty damn good to me. I know you’d probably prefer to be at Mags’ place right now, and if that’s what you really want, I’ll do my best to help you get there – but I can pretty much guarantee that those shoes you love so much will be completely ruined by the time you do.’
Oh yes. Right. Snow plus gorgeous new shoes which were certainly not made for navigating snowy pavements. Yep, he had a point. That was a bit of an issue.
‘This “Castle Bride”, is that something you have to get done this weekend?’
I nodded. ‘Well, yes, ideally. I said I’d send her something over, just some basic ideas to start with, by the end of tomorrow.’
‘Ok. Well, I’ve got some papers to look at too so if you’re happy that you have everything you need to get on with things here, then why don’t we just get our work done and reassess the situation later?’
‘Ok.’ I nodded.
‘Great! Oh, your dress should be dry. I put it in the machine last night.’
‘Oh, thanks!’ I hopped up from my seat and moved over to dishwasher where I began loading the breakfast plates in.
‘I’m just going to take a shower. Unless you want to go first?’ Rob hesitated at the doorway.
‘No, it’s fine,’ I said, now reaching in to the dryer to pull out my clothes, ‘I’ll just– oh no!’
‘What’s wrong?’ He frowned, padding back in slowly.
I pulled my dress out of the dryer and laid it over the back of the seat. Rob glanced at it.
‘Am I missing something because it looks – oh!’
I was holding up my beautiful designer cashmere cardigan. The colour of cornflowers in summer, I’d spent ages deciding whether to buy it, and had finally splashed out in celebration when my very first bride walked down the aisle. As soft and gorgeous as I’d imagined, and adding style and elegance to my outfit, it had been perfect. And it was still perfect. Assuming you were the size of a three-year-old.
I still hadn’t said anything and Rob still hadn’t moved any closer.
‘I’m guessing that label must say “Do Not Tumble”.’ he eventually volunteered.
A nod and a strangulated noise came from me as I laid my gorgeous, now tiny, cardi on the counter. There really was no rectifying this. It was gone.
‘I’m so sorry, Izzy. I’ll get you another one.’
I shook my head and finally looked at him. ‘It’s all right. Really. It’s just a jumper.’ Which was true. It was just a jumper. Just some wool all knitted up. That’s all. And I knew that Rob would want to replace it, whatever I said. It’s just that this one had such special memories attached to it – that first dress, all the way from design to completion. And the bride had been so insistent on having me there on the day because she was so happy with her dress and wanted to share that joy with me. And now I wouldn’t wear it again. I felt stupid at being upset over a bunch of wool, but there we are.
‘It’s not just a jumper though, is it?’ Rob asked.
I looked back up and shoved all the silliness aside. ‘Of course it is. Don’t worry about it! Thank you for drying the rest of my clothes, anyway,’ I hurried over in my head the fact that my underwear was also in there, and Rob would have had a good eyeful of that.
He held my gaze a moment then turned and headed back towards the bedrooms. ‘You can grab a shower first if you’d like. I’m going for a run.’
‘What, now?’ I called to him.
‘Yes,’ came the reply from behind the now closed bedroom door.
‘But it’s feet deep in snow! You’ll break your bloody neck!’
There was no reply. A few minutes later, Rob appeared wearing running leggings, thankfully with shorts over them. Lovely as any man in good shape looks, running leggings are not a good look. He was zipping up a breathable jacket and a hat was pulled down over his ears. He finished lacing his shoes then pulled on his gloves. All the time I was stood just watching. I knew this was something to do with me, and I didn’t like it.
‘Rob, this is ridiculous.’
‘What is?’
‘You, doing this.’
‘Izz, I go running most weekends.’
‘Yes, but five minutes ago, you weren’t going. Then we go have Cardi-Gate and the next minute you’re heading out in several feet of snow for a run.’
‘It’s nothing to do with that, Izzy. Really. Yes, I feel bad that I ruined your top. But as you said, it’s just a jumper, so I’ll replace it, and we’ll be all square. This? This is just about me feeling like going for a run.’
I didn’t believe it for a moment. And he knew I didn’t. We both knew that the jumper wasn’t just a jumper either and it was all raging out of control, and yet neither of us were prepared to say anything, just pretending everything was all absolutely fine. When clearly it wasn’t. I was upset and pretending I wasn’t. He was upset that I was upset but pretending that he didn’t know I was upset, so that we could both go on with this ridiculous charade. This was exactly why I should have gone to a hotel last night. Complications like this don’t happen at hotels. Yes, they might still have shrunk my cardigan but I could have happily yelled at them and asked them why they didn’t read the labels. Rob, on the other hand, I couldn’t even begin to be angry with because he’d just been trying to be helpful and had done so much to make the evening relaxed and pleasant. Oh God! Why hadn’t I just stood my ground and gone to a hotel!
Rob’s movements brought me back out of my trance. ‘Rob, really. This is just silly. Look at it out there!’ I pointed to the window where the snow was coming down again. ‘You’ll freeze!’
‘Thermals,’ was all he said.
I didn’t have a reply for that one.
‘Rob, please. Come on, it’s horrid out there.’
‘Izzy, stop worrying. I’ve been out in far worse conditions than this on manoeuvres in the past.’ He turned to fish his keys out of the bowl on the side.
‘Yes, but that was only because there was someone telling you you had to go! Probably someone quite short and shouty!’
Rob looked at me meaningfully but said nothing.
I threw my head back. ‘Argh! You’re impossible!’
‘Not the first time that’s been said.’ he replied, pulling open the door.
‘Apparently, you haven’t improved.’
‘Doesn’t look like it.’ he agreed, ‘See you in a bit.’ With that, he closed the door behind him and left me in the silence of the flat.
I felt a little better after a shower and hair wash but not a lot. Rob still wasn’t back and my mind kept racing off into scenarios where he was spread eagled on the pavement with his limbs pointing in positions that they really