on her, but it could so easily have been a disaster, and he felt sick. Sick and stupid and irresponsible.
‘What the hell did you think you were doing? You don’t hold a cup of boiling tea over a child!’ Julia raged, and he stepped back, devastated that he might so easily have caused his tiny daughter harm.
‘I’m sorry. I didn’t think— Is she all right? Does she need to go to hospital?’
‘No, you must have missed her, she’s fine—no thanks to you.’
‘You gave her to me.’
‘I didn’t expect you to pour tea over her!’
‘It missed her.’
‘Only by the grace of God! It could have gone all over her! Of all the stupid, stupid—’
‘You were holding your tea over them!’
‘It had cold water in it! What do you think that was for? Shush, sweetheart, it’s OK.’ But the babies were both screaming now, upset by the shouting and the whining of the dog, and he stepped back again, shaking his head.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said roughly. ‘Jules, I’m so sorry—’
He scrubbed his hand through his hair and turned away, furious with himself for his stupidity, but he wasn’t to be allowed to wallow.
‘Here, hold her. I need to change her. I’ll get her some clean, dry clothes.’ And then she paused and looked up at him, her lashes spiked with tears, and her voice softened. ‘She’s all right, Max. It was just the shock. I’m sorry I yelled at you.’
‘She could have been—’ He broke off, and Julia’s face contorted.
‘Don’t. It was an accident. Just hold her. I’ll only be a moment.’
He didn’t move a muscle. Just stood there, motionless, until she came back into the room armed with nappies and tiny clothes, and took the screaming baby out of his arms. Then he sat down, buried his face in his hands and sucked in a breath.
‘Can you cuddle Libby, please?’
He pulled himself together and sat up. ‘Do you trust me?’ he asked tersely, and she gave him a grim smile.
‘I have to, don’t I? You’re their father.’
‘Am I?’
‘Max, of course you are! Who else?’
‘I don’t know, but perhaps we should get a DNA test.’
Her face went white. ‘Whatever for? I wouldn’t lie to you about that. And I’m not about to start asking you for money to support us, either.’
‘I wasn’t thinking about money, I was thinking about paternity. And I wouldn’t have thought you would lie about it, but then I wouldn’t have thought you’d leave me without warning, shack up with another man and have two children without bothering to share the information with me. So clearly I don’t know you nearly as well as I thought I did and, yes, I want a DNA test,’ he said, his anger rising to the surface again. ‘Because, apart from anything else, it might be handy in court.’
‘Court?’ She looked aghast. ‘Why court? I’m not going to do anything to obstruct your access.’
‘I don’t know that. You might move again—go into hiding somewhere else. I know you’ve got your passport with you. But on the other hand, if you decide to go for maintenance, I want to be damn sure it’s my kids I’m paying for.’
She gasped, her eyes wounded, and he felt a total heel.
‘Don’t bother to turn the tears on,’ he growled, hating it—because he thought she was going to cry and Jules never, ever cried—but his words rallied her and she straightened up and glared at him.
‘I’d forgotten what a bastard you are, Max. You don’t need a test to prove you’re the father! You were with me every minute of the day and night when they were conceived. Who else could it possibly have been?’
He shrugged. ‘John Blake?’
She stared at him, then started to laugh. ‘John? No. No, John’s not a threat to you. Trust me. Apart from the fact that he’s in his late fifties and definitely not my type, he’s gay.’
The surge of relief was so great it took his breath away. She hadn’t had an affair—and the babies were his. Definitely.
And one of them was still screaming for attention.
He picked Libby up, moving almost on autopilot, and went over to where Julia was dressing Ava. She ran her eyes over his chest. ‘Your shirt’s soaked. Are you all right?’ she asked, without a flicker of compassion, and he told himself he didn’t deserve it anyway.
‘I’m sure I’ll live,’ he replied tersely. ‘Is she really OK?’
‘She’s fine, Max,’ Julia said, her voice grudging but fair as ever. ‘It was an accident. Don’t worry about it.’
Easy to say, not so easy to do. Especially when, some time later, after they’d been fed little pots of disgusting-smelling goo—how lamb and vegetables could possibly smell so vile he had no idea—Julia put the babies down in their cots for a sleep and made him take off his shirt, and he saw the reddened skin over his chest and shoulder. If that had been Ava…
He nearly retched with the thought, but Julia’s soft sound of dismay stopped him in his tracks.
‘Idiot. You told me you were all right!’ she scolded softly, guilt in her eyes, and then spread something green and cool over his skin with infinite gentleness.
‘What’s that?’ he asked, his voice a little hoarse, because it was so long since she’d touched him that the feel of her fingers on his skin was enough to take the legs out from under him.
‘It’s aloe vera gel,’ she murmured. ‘It’s good for burns.’
And then she looked up and met his eyes, and time stopped. He couldn’t breathe, his heart was lodged in his throat, and for the life of him he couldn’t look away.
He wanted her.
He was still furious with her for keeping the babies from him, for leaving him without warning and dropping off the face of the earth, but he’d never stopped loving her, and he loved her now.
‘Jules—’
She stepped back, the spell broken by the whispered word, and screwed the lid back on the gel, but her fingers were trembling, and for some crazy reason that gave him hope.
‘You need a clean shirt. Have you got anything with you?’
‘Yes, in the car. I’ve got a case with me.’
She looked back at him, her eyes widening. ‘You’re planning on staying?’ she said in a breathless whisper, and he gave a short huff of laughter.
‘Oh yes. Yes, Jules, I’m staying, because, now I’ve found you, I’m not losing sight of you or my children again.’
CHAPTER TWO
HE WENT out to his car to get a dry shirt, and she watched him through the window, her hand over her mouth.
He was staying?
Oh, lord. Staying here? No! No, he couldn’t stay here, not with her! She couldn’t let him get that close, because she knew him, knew that look in his eyes, knew just how vulnerable she was to his potent sexual charm. He’d only have to touch her and she’d crumple like a wet tissue.
She was shocked at the change in him, though.
He’d lost weight; she’d been right. He was thinner, the taut muscles right there under her fingers as she’d smoothed the gel on his reddened skin. His hair was touched with grey at the temples, and he looked every one of his thirty-eight years. He’d aged in the last year