Kate James

A Child's Christmas


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outside the train terminal, she couldn’t help the short, bitter laugh that escaped her lips—then realized she’d let her guard down when she felt Jason tug on her hand.

      Paige was immediately contrite and forced a bright smile onto her face. Seeing the worry in her little boy’s blue eyes, she bent down and lovingly brushed his ash-blond hair from his forehead.

      Knowing the perfect distraction, she suggested, with a cheer she didn’t feel, “How about we go to McDonald’s for lunch?”

      His eyes cleared, and a grin spread across his freckled face. “Can we, Mom?”

      She zipped up his jacket to shield him from the biting November wind. “We most certainly can!”

      After lunch, they walked along Camden Falls’ tree-lined Main Street, pausing whenever Jason wanted to examine a brightly colored leaf or greet a passing dog. He clutched her hand tightly as they made their way home, glancing up at her periodically with eyes strikingly similar to her own. Occasionally, she’d lean toward him and whisper something in his ear or simply touch his arm, his shoulder, the top of his head.

      Paige couldn’t imagine her life without her little boy, but it was a possibility she might have to face.

      Jason had a malignant brain tumor.

      They’d taken the train that morning to see an oncologist at the Rosenthal Cancer Center in nearby Boston. If he was correct, this could be her son’s last year. Paige had to believe they could beat the disease, but she knew the odds were stacked against them. After all, this wasn’t their first battle with the devastating disease.

      The day had taken its toll on Jason. By the time they reached their small ground-floor apartment, he could barely keep his eyes open. He yawned as Paige tucked him in for a nap. She sat beside him long after he fell asleep, not wanting to leave him, needing always and forever to protect him, wishing she could smooth the furrows between his brows—a constant sign that he was never fully free from pain.

      Yet Jason had an indomitable spirit. He never complained. He was a warm and loving child. Intelligent, even-tempered, so easy to please. Paige was thankful for that, since she didn’t have the means to give him much. What Jason lacked in material things, she was determined to make up for with her love.

      Hearing the tap on her front door reminded Paige that she was running late. She wouldn’t have time to change into something more businesslike for work. Fortunately, she was employed at a call center for a financial collection agency. Since her interactions with people were over the phone, it didn’t matter if she wore the jeans she had on, although she preferred not to. She took another moment to tuck the blanket more snugly around her little boy and place a kiss on his brow.

      Opening the door, she welcomed her silver-haired neighbor. “Hello, Mrs. Bennett. How’s Mr. Bennett’s arthritis today?”

      “He’s doing well. Thank you for asking.”

      Paige was immensely grateful to Mrs. Bennett for her willingness to take care of Jason while Paige was at work. She felt guilty that Mrs. Bennett wouldn’t accept any payment, but it was also a relief that she didn’t have to stretch her limited funds.

      Mrs. Bennett glanced around. “Is our little man in his room reading?”

      Paige shook her head and opened the hall closet. “He’s sleeping. It was a hard day for him.”

      As Paige put on her coat, Mrs. Bennett placed a hand lightly on her arm. Concern infused her voice and clouded her eyes as she asked, “How did it go at the hospital this morning?”

      The simple question threatened Paige’s self-control. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply before responding in a shaky voice, “Not well.”

      Mrs. Bennett tightened her grip on Paige’s arm. “What did the oncologist say?”

      Paige shook her head. “I have to get to work. I can’t go into it now.”

      Mrs. Bennett pulled Paige into a comforting hug. “Okay, dear. Go to work. When you come home, I’ll make us a nice pot of tea and we’ll talk.”

      * * *

      WHAT WAS IT about the holidays, Daniel Kinsley wondered as he returned to his desk, that seemed to bring out the worst in people?

      He was glad he had some time to spare before his next appointment. His meeting with Gloria Farnsworth had put him in a miserable mood. He dropped heavily into his chair and swung it around to stare out the window. Across the street, a billboard displaying a Norman Rockwell–style scene seemed to mock him. It showed a cheerful, ruddy-faced Santa distributing brightly wrapped gifts to an elegantly dressed and ridiculously happy family. The husband clasped his wife’s hand affectionately, and the model-perfect woman stroked the blonde curls of a little girl in a red velvet dress. Daniel snorted. Did anyone really live like that? Not in his experience.

      He thought of his own parents and their respectful, polite relationship. When was the last time he’d seen his parents touch? For that matter, his mother’s obligatory cheek kisses aside, he couldn’t recall his parents ever touching him with affection. They never argued. They never fought. But he also wasn’t sure they actually loved each other. A sad statement, especially after forty-three years of marriage.

      It didn’t help his mood to remember that he’d agreed to spend more than a week with them in Newport over the holidays. He knew there’d be no Christmas cheer in that. At times he questioned why his parents stayed together. Then again, maybe they had it right. No love, no pain. Not wanting to dwell on it, he allowed his thoughts to come full circle to Gloria Farnsworth.

      Daniel turned away from the window and looked down at the open Farnsworth case file on his desk. He’d been tempted to tell Gloria to find another lawyer. But would that really have accomplished anything? More than half his cases disgusted him in one way or another. Okay, maybe none quite as much as the Farnsworth case, but if he wanted to extricate himself from cases that he found morally reprehensible, where exactly would he draw the line?

      He picked up his pen and twirled it between his fingers.

      Gloria Farnsworth was definitely at the extreme end. She’d torn a strip off him when he told her she should be satisfied with the spousal support her husband had agreed to—generous in his estimation—and accept that she was on shaky ground trying to get child support for a nineteen-year-old who wasn’t attending school and didn’t have a job. Gloria had demanded to know under what conditions she would be entitled. And fool that he was, he’d treated her like a rational person and explained some of the circumstances under which case law might entitle her to child support. He never would’ve imagined that she’d jump on one of the alternatives and willingly label her own son mentally disabled for the sake of gouging more money out of her soon-to-be-ex.

      It was repugnant. Daniel knew it wouldn’t hold up in court—no expert witness would testify to it—but things probably wouldn’t come to that. Having met the husband on a couple of occasions, he sensed that the man cared about his child. Daniel was quite certain he’d settle rather than subject his son to the pain and humiliation of being questioned in court about his mental capacity.

      Maybe Daniel should tell Gloria Farnsworth to take a long hike off a short— Whoa! She’d really gotten to him. In more polite terms, he would ask her to hire another lawyer. He refused to be party to what essentially amounted to fraud.

      He straightened the papers, closed the file folder and tossed his pen on top.

      With his parents’ loveless marriage, plus the hostile family disputes he witnessed at work, it was hardly surprising that he was still single at thirty-six.

      Why couldn’t people be civil to one another? As an idealistic law student, he’d chosen family law because he wanted to help people, yet his caseload was dominated by nasty divorce and custody battles. Who was he kidding? He hadn’t helped anyone in a long time in any way other than to better their financial circumstances or inflict hardship and pain on their spouses. It was a bitter disappointment to see how people who’d supposedly once loved each