Cathy Thacker Gillen

Hannah's Baby


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looked back at Hannah, clearly wanting more. Hannah seemed nonplussed. “Should we fix her another bottle?”

      She was asking him? What did he know about babies, except how to hold one in an emergency? “Sounds fine to me,” he said, returning the decision to her.

      HANNAH DIDN’T KNOW WHAT HAD gotten into her. She had been preparing for this day for months now, yet she was suddenly all flustered. Worse, she knew why. From the moment they’d first met, she’d always been a little too aware of Joe.

      And it was more than just his appearance—which was very appealing in itself. But, ultimately it was the sophistication that came from seeing so much of the world. The way he knew when to come a little closer, and when to back off. It was the kindness in his eyes, the gentleness in his touch, and the way Isabella looked up at him, completely spellbound after just a few minutes in his strong arms.

      He would have been the perfect father to her baby.

      If only he’d been interested in having a family…which he wasn’t.

      She needed to remember that. And she needed to stop leaning on him, asking him to help her get Isabella settled in.

      “Want me to hold her while you fix another bottle?” Joe asked.

      It was now or never. She had told everyone she could do this as a single mother. It was time to prove it. Hannah drew a bolstering breath. “Actually, I think we’re fine. So if you want to do anything else…see the sights, go out to dinner…it’d be fine. We’ll be fine.”

      For a second, Joe’s expression didn’t change. Then, ever so subtly, a veil came over his emotions. Once again, he became the Joe who had picked her up two days ago. The Joe who had taken her to the airport and sat in a different section of the airplane. The Joe who was there to escort her to and from Taiwan and nothing more.

      “Good idea.” He flashed her a handsome grin that filled her senses. “You two probably want time to settle in.”

      Oblivious to her disappointment, he pocketed his electronic room key and gave her a wink. “Don’t wait up.”

      IN THE HOURS THAT FOLLOWED, Hannah had plenty of time to regret her decision to send Joe off into the nightlife of Taipei. The first moment came when she realized she only had enough powder for one more bottle, and Isabella didn’t like the taste of the American-made soy formula she had brought with her. Fortunately, one of the other adoptive families on the floor had anticipated this and made a run to the closest grocery for more. They shared their extra with Hannah.

      The next problem was not so easily solved.

      She was still contemplating what to do about it when Joe returned four hours later. He walked in, saw her sitting in a chair, Isabella cradled in her arms.

      He lifted one blond brow. “Still awake?”

      Fatigue fighting with the contentment deep inside her, Hannah nodded. “Oh, yeah.”

      Joe set his room key, wallet and BlackBerry on top of the bureau. He toed off his loafers, then came over to sit on the side of the bed, opposite her. He braced his elbows on his thighs. Leaning closer, his expression softened as his gaze moved over the fully alert baby snuggled contentedly in her arms. “That’s not a good thing?”

      Hannah didn’t have a lot of experience with infants. But…“In the orphanage she would have been asleep two hours ago, or so the schedule says.”

      Joe shifted his gaze from Isabella Zhu Ming to Hannah. “Then what happened?”

      Hannah flushed at his scrutiny. “I’m not sure.”

      He returned his attention to the baby. “What do you know?”

      Hannah made a face that mirrored her inner frustration at having apparently failed as a mother so soon. A good mother, she felt, would have been able to take charge immediately, rather than be at the mercy of emotions in her baby she couldn’t quite soothe. She inclined her head at Isabella. “I can’t get her to sleep and I can’t put her down.”

      Joe took a moment to consider that. “If you can’t put her down, how do you change her diaper?” he asked eventually.

      Despite her efforts to play it cool, ruefulness crept into her tone. “With great difficulty.”

      Joe eyed the telltale stains on her white dress. “I see what you mean,” he remarked dryly, knowing as well as Hannah she couldn’t sit there forever. “So what’s the plan?” he asked.

      “I was going to try and bathe her in the hopes that the warm water would relax her.”

      Joe seemed to concur that it was a good plan. “But…?”

      Hannah swallowed, aware she was beginning to feel overwhelmed by all she didn’t know and had yet to experience. “Isabella’s never had an actual bath in a tub or sink. The caretakers wipe them down with washcloths in the orphanage.”

      Compassion lit his eyes. “You think she’s going to freak?”

      Unfortunately, yes. “It had occurred to me.”

      He squinted. “What happened to her hair?”

      Hannah looked down at the top of Isabella’s head. “I rubbed baby oil into her scalp, to soften the cradle cap.”

      Joe moved to stand beside Hannah. “It looks soft, all right.”

      As well as greasy. “Obviously, I need to shampoo that out.”

      Looking more man of action than uninvolved bystander, Joe braced his hands on his waist. “Hard to do if you can’t put her down,” he noted.

      Hannah didn’t want Isabella screaming in terror before she even got her in the water. Nor could she do everything with one hand, while still holding Isabella with the other. “Exactly.”

      Joe sized up the situation. “Want me to help?”

      He didn’t know how much. Yet, her conscience prevailed. “I promised you that you wouldn’t have to do this stuff,” Hannah reminded him guiltily.

      Joe’s lips tightened with determination. “Let me put it to you this way. If she doesn’t sleep, you don’t sleep. And if neither of you sleep, I won’t sleep…and I like to sleep. So, what do you say we get this show on the road? Where do you want to do this?” he asked.

      Hannah sized up the accommodations. The bathtub was way too big and deep for a baby who couldn’t even sit up yet. “How about the sink?”

      “Good choice.” Joe cleared the toiletries from the marble counter between the two sinks. “She can look at herself in the mirror.”

      Hannah turned the infant so that Isabella could see her reflection. The smile she had hoped to see did not come, but Isabella kept her gaze on the mirror. “If you could hold her, I can get everything ready.”

      Joe held out his hands. Their hands and arms touched as they shifted the baby from her embrace to his. Isabella’s brows knit together, but she did not make a sound.

      Hannah spread a thick hotel towel on the counter, and draped the baby bath towel on top of that. She brought in a bottle of lavender-scented baby wash and shampoo, a small thin baby washcloth, a clean diaper, undershirt and sleeper. Joe swayed the baby back and forth in his arms until the shallow oval basin was filled with warm water.

      Hannah turned to him, aware she was nervous again. Maybe because it had never been more important to her to do something right. “I’ll ease her clothes off while you hold her.”

      “Sounds good.”

      Gently, she eased the pants and sweater Isabella had been wearing from her body. The diaper, after that. It was the first time Hannah had seen her baby without any clothing. She was shocked by how thin Isabella’s arms were, but relieved to see her torso was nice and sturdy, her ribs barely discernible beneath her delicate golden skin.

      Hannah