A Ranger For Christmas. Stella Bagwell

      His gaze made a thoughtful survey of her face, and Vivian felt as though his brown eyes were kissing her cheeks and lips. The erotic sensation was like nothing she’d ever felt before and she wondered if she was suffering some sort of hormonal imbalance. This wasn’t normal! Nothing about the way she was reacting to Sawyer was remotely close to normal.

      “Then the sister-in-law is not of your liking,” he replied. “Is that what worries you?”

      “No. Kat is like a sister to me. She’s a wonderful mother and human being. I love her and I’m very happy for the both of them.”

      He shook his head as though she’d lost him somewhere along the trail.

      “So you’re happy and sad at the same time. That’s what you’re trying to say?”

      “Crazy, isn’t it?” she said with a self-deprecating laugh. “I should be all smiles. Instead, I want to burst into tears. Believe me, Sawyer, I don’t normally behave like an emotional female. And starting right now, I’m going to put this all behind me. So let’s get out and look the pavilion over. This is where Mort has scheduled the Christmas bingo party and we need to decide how many tables and chairs we can set up without crowding everyone.”

      “We’ll get to work in a minute,” he agreed. “Right now, I want to ask you something.”

      Determined to show him she wasn’t a weak-willed sniveling female, she straightened her shoulders. “Okay. What is it? That you want to swap places with another ranger so that you can get the heck away from me?”

      Clearly amused by her question, he chuckled. “No. I’m just wondering if this sadness you’re feeling is really envy?”

      There he went again, she thought desperately. He was putting his finger right on the sore spot in her heart.

      Glancing away from him, she focused on a far distant rise, where a young couple had spent the night in a tent. At the moment they were standing at a portable grill, laughing at their feeble attempts to start a fire. Garth had never done anything outdoors with her, Vivian thought dully. But unfortunately, she’d not discovered he’d been a man averse to getting his hands dirty, until after she’d married him.

      “I suppose that is what I’m feeling. You see, I always wanted a big family of my own—just like my parents had. It didn’t turn out that way for me. And sometimes, well—it’s hard to accept that life can be so different from what we plan.”

       Chapter Four

      She wanted babies. Her heart was pining for a big family. The facts should’ve turned his red-hot attraction for Vivian into an iceberg, but nothing was freezing, especially his heart. Right now it felt like a piece of warm putty, just waiting for her to mold into whatever shape she wanted it to be.

      Oh, man, if he didn’t get a grip, he was going to be a goner, Sawyer thought. Everyone on the res, everyone at Dead Horse Ranch, anyone who’d ever met him for more than five minutes, knew that he wasn’t stacked up to be a family man.

      Hell, how could he be? For the first eight years of Sawyer’s life, his father, Baul, had been too busy working to put food on the table and trying to pacify a demanding wife to pay too much attention to his son. And after he’d died, there had been no man around to teach Sawyer about being a father or husband. Besides, from what he remembered about his parents’ marriage, he wanted no part of it.

      Forcing his gaze away from Vivian’s lovely face, he gazed out the windshield to the young couple with the tent. If the man would keep his hands to himself, the woman might be able to cook breakfast. Bet he wasn’t her husband, Sawyer thought. The pair was having way too much fun to be married.

      He said, “I wouldn’t be feeling sad about that, Viv. You have plenty of time to find the right man and have more children.”

      The right man? Who was he kidding? Just saying the words had felt like he was coughing up mesquite thorns. He didn’t want to think of this beauty making love to any man, except him.

      She continued to look at him for long moments and then a wide smile spread across her face. “You’re so right, Sawyer. I have a wonderful daughter and my life is going just fine. It’s not like I need a man in my life. They’re really just a nuisance, anyway.”

      “Thanks,” he said drily.

      She laughed and, though he didn’t exactly know what had caused her mood to lift, he was thankful for the change.

      “Oh, I didn’t mean you, Sawyer. You’re my coworker. I’m talking about boyfriends, husbands, lovers. I don’t need that kind of drama in my life again.”

      You’re my coworker. Clearly she wasn’t thinking of him as a potential lover, Sawyer thought. But sooner, rather than later, he was going to change her mind.

      “Never say never, Viv.” He gave her a playful wink, then opened the passenger door. “We’d better get to work.”

      “Right,” she agreed. “We need to be at the Indian Mesa trailhead at ten o’clock. And from the amount of campers we now have in this area of the park, I expect we’ll have a big group for the tour today.”

      Yesterday, before the workday had ended, Sawyer and Vivian learned that Mort had scheduled the two of them to lead a group tour this morning to the Puebloan ruins located on the north rim of the lake. The trek was something Vivian and her old partner, Louis, had done many times in the past. She knew the history of the park backward and forward, whereas Sawyer hadn’t yet had time to learn his way around the park, much less study its history.

      As the two of them walked toward the pavilion, he said, “Last night I took home as much literature I could find about the Hohokam ruins and crammed for a few hours.”

      She shot him a look of surprise. “That wasn’t necessary, Sawyer.”

      Oh, yes, it was necessary, he thought. The last thing he wanted to do was make a fool of himself in front of this woman.

      “I wanted to be prepared.”

      She looked over at him and smiled and Sawyer felt an odd little tug in the middle of his chest. The tender pang was like nothing he’d experienced before, making him wonder if he was suddenly turning into a sap, or something worse.

      “Listen, Sawyer, don’t be worried about the tour. I’m not expecting you to expertly answer questions about the ruins. You only started this job yesterday. It took me months and months to learn the history of the park. Just help me keep the visitors corralled and safe. That’s all I ask.”

      She was trying to be nice by making it easy on him. Sawyer appreciated the fact that she wasn’t being demanding. Yet he didn’t warm to the notion that she considered him just a temporary ranger to fill a space until the real ranger returned. Maybe it was stupid for Sawyer’s male ego to be rearing its head, but he wanted Vivian to see that he was a quick learner and that he wasn’t going to spend the next six months trotting behind her while she carried the load.