she glanced up she found Donovan was still watching her. “Yes, sir. The man who takes you for a wife is going to be a mighty lucky man.”
Nathan must have seen that as his cue because he stepped forward. “Donovan, I think you and I should have a talk about what’s appropriate when it comes to young ladies.”
Ellie slipped away just as Kate and her children stepped forward to look at the pig. Kate’s wary eyes darted to Donovan as her children crooned to the animal. “He’s a strange man. You’d do well to stay away from him. He may be harmless, but it pays to be careful.”
“I’ve been doing my best.”
“Well, Nathan will be on high alert, too, as I’m sure Lawson will.”
“I appreciate that.” She left the piglet in an empty stall under the watchful eyes of the children then went to finish Delilah’s hooves. She found Lawson had beaten her to it. “You don’t have to do that. I can finish what I started.”
“It’s fine,” he said, but didn’t glance up from his work. “Maybe you could start on Samson.”
“Delilah was the last one.” She propped her boot on the gate of the stall and watched him work, noticing the controlled power that surged through each motion.
“This will only take a minute.” He released Delilah’s hoof then straightened to meet her gaze. “It looks like our supposed engagement lit a fire under some of your suitors.”
She crossed her arms along the stall’s gate and leaned against it. “It’s awfully silly.”
“Silly?” He eyed her carefully, then turned away to run his hand down Delilah’s back leg to get the horse to lift her foot. “You know I think I’ve got you figured out, Ms. O’Brien. The ruse is up.”
She frowned at him in confusion. “What are you talking about?”
“You don’t really want to get married.”
“Of course I do. That’s the most ridiculous statement I’ve ever heard.”
“So you say.” He finished cleaning Delilah’s hoof and turned to face her. “Yet, over the past few days, you’ve managed to discourage two completely different types of men.”
She shrugged nonchalantly. “So what if I did? I didn’t like them, that’s all.”
Lawson rubbed his chin in thoughtful speculation. Delilah nudged him in the back, forcing him to take two steps toward her. “What about Chris?”
She narrowed her eyes. “What about him?”
“He said his feelings for you changed a long time ago.” He braced his hands on either side of her arms and tilted his head. “Are you saying you really didn’t notice?”
“I had no idea,” she said honestly.
“I think that leads us to the crux of the matter.”
She raised her brows expectantly. “Which would be?”
He gave a slow smile, and shook his head. “You, Ellie O’Brien, are afraid to take off the blinders you’ve fashioned.”
“What blinders?”
“The ones that keep you from seeing yourself as everyone else sees you—as a kind, beautiful, spontaneous woman.”
She stared at him in awe. He thought she was beautiful? Hadn’t he always thought of her as one of the boys? Hadn’t he always seen her as a surrogate little sister? Apparently, somehow that had changed. He now saw her as beautiful—a woman. She swallowed. Why did that send her heart galloping in her chest?
He carefully guided her chin up until she was forced to meet the knowing smile in his eyes. “You’re the kind of woman who wouldn’t have any trouble finding herself a husband, if she didn’t try so hard to cross every suitable man off her list or give him away to her friends.”
She didn’t have anything to say because she’d suddenly realized why those relatively suitable men had seemed so unsuitable. She realized it because she was staring the reason right in the face. She, Ellie O’Brien, had a crush on Lawson Williams.
She barely withheld a groan. She had no idea how long this had been going on but she needed it to stop. Talk about embarrassing! He obviously didn’t feel the same way. He thought proposing to her was so ridiculous that he’d turned it into a joke! Just because he said she was a beautiful woman didn’t mean he considered her a woman he’d want to pursue. Goodness, he’d only been trying to encourage her. It didn’t mean anything. As though to confirm her assessment, he stepped back and shook his head. “You need to give one of those men on your list a chance, Ellie.”
She gathered her wits enough to lift an impervious eyebrow at his statement. “No, I don’t.”
He grinned. “Then I stand by my other statement. You aren’t really searching for a husband. So what are you searching for?”
“Love,” she said softly. “The kind of love that Nathan has for Kate and Sean has for Lorelei. I do want that, Lawson. I just haven’t found a man who can love me like that or at least a man that I want to be loved by. I think if I had that, why, I might be a different person altogether.”
He frowned at her. “What’s wrong with the person you are now?”
“Do I really need to list my faults for you? I’d rather not.” Especially since some of them she couldn’t even admit to herself. Nevertheless, she’d been achingly aware of them lately...ever since Mrs. Greene mentioned consequences from the mistakes Ellie had made in the past—whatever they were.
“No, you don’t have to do that,” he said, then shook his head. “I still think you’re selling yourself short in many respects.”
She backed away from the stall’s gate so he could walk through it. “Well, I think I just have a very clear view of my weaknesses.”
A very clear view, she thought with a sideways look at Lawson as they walked to the corral. She planned to overcome one of them as quickly as possible to save both of them from embarrassment.
* * *
“Lawson, are you decent? Your parents came early to help set up for the party and want to see your cabin.”
He froze at the sound of Ellie’s voice as he glanced around in a panic at his messy cabin. Why hadn’t he folded his clothes instead of dumping them in the chair near the cold fireplace? He probably should have swept out the dirt he’d tracked in. “Stall them for a minute, will you? This place is a mess.”
An awkward silence seeped through the closed front door. He sighed and grabbed his shirt. “They’re standing right next to you, aren’t they?”
“Yep.” Her muffled voice continued cheerily, “Lawson has been such a big help setting up for Maddie and Jeff’s engagement party. I kept finding one more little thing for him to do so I’m afraid I’ve made him late getting ready.”
He heard his parents respond but didn’t bother to try to decipher what they were saying. Instead, he stuffed his clothes into the trunk at the end of his bed, straightened his bedding, pushed the chair under the table and hoped they wouldn’t notice the dirt on the floor. He opened the door as he tucked his shirt into his pants. “Welcome to my humble home.”
Lettie stepped inside wearing a pert little blue bonnet over her dark brown hair and carrying a basket that filled the cabin with the smell of freshly baked apple pie. “What a cute little cabin.”
Doc chuckled as he clasped Lawson on the shoulder. “Lettie, that isn’t exactly what a man wants to hear about his first home as a bachelor.”
Ellie leaned against the doorway to peer inside. “Well, it should be cute. I picked out all the decorations.”
“Did you?” Lettie asked with new interest.
“She