know his mother gave him up, and trying to keep from thinking about how her heart had skittered at his touch.
She liked this man sitting next to her very much but she couldn’t begin to care for him in any way except as a friend. There would only be heartache to follow if she did.
She was more like those women in his class than he knew. And even though he wanted to help them all, when it came to his heart, no man wanted to court a used woman and that was a fact she’d accepted long ago. She must take care not to let herself forget it now.
“Thank you again for agreeing to help, Rebecca,” Ben said, breaking into her thoughts. “Please don’t think I expect you to fix these women’s lives. I know they are the only ones who can do that...and then only with God’s help. I’d just like them to realize they can get through it all and make a good life for themselves. But I don’t expect you to have to do any more than listen and encourage them, if they come to you. And if it becomes too much...”
The expression in his eyes was so earnest she had to reassure him. “I’ll let you know.”
Their trolley came to a stop and it was so cold out that Rebecca was relieved when he said, “Let’s make a run for it!”
“Let’s!” It was just what she wanted to do.
They took off laughing and she wondered if Ben felt as much like a child as she did. They reached Heaton House and hurried inside to the fireplace in the parlor.
“I’m so cold my teeth are chattering,” Rebecca said, proving her point.
“Gretchen is making hot chocolate. That should warm you up,” her mother said.
“We had some already and it didn’t help for long.” Ben shivered.
“It will this time,” Mrs. Heaton said. “You aren’t going back out into the cold tonight.”
“How was Jenny, Mama? Did she give you any trouble?”
“None at all. I read her a story and listened to her prayers just a little while ago. I think she was asleep before I left the room.”
“She usually is.” Rebecca turned to warm her hands at the same time Ben did. Both of them were still shaking.
“She played charades with us before Mrs. Heaton put her to bed,” Julia said. “She’s very smart, Rebecca.”
Rebecca turned back around with a smile. “Thank you. I think so, too.”
“She takes after you,” Ben whispered to her.
“Do you think so?” Rebecca felt heat rise in her face, but was it because she was standing at the fireplace or because of Ben’s compliment?
“I do.”
Maida, Gretchen’s sister, came in with a loaded tray of steaming hot chocolate and they all took a cup. Rebecca sipped hers and let it slide down her throat. “Finally, I’m beginning to feel warm again.”
Ben smiled at her over the brim of his cup. “Me, too.”
“So how did your first class go, Rebecca?” Millicent asked.
“It went very well. Ben is a very good teacher. He managed to hold everyone’s attention through math. And I think he has a few admirers in his class.”
Ben shook his head. “No, I don’t think so.”
He seemed flushed and she wondered if she’d embarrassed him. She hoped not. But she was afraid to say more in case she made it worse.
“Well, I’m going to go check on Jenny. And I have homework to do, thanks to my teacher.” She grinned at Ben before crossing the room to kiss her mother on the cheek. “Thank you for watching over my girl, Mama.”
Her mother leaned close and whispered, “You know Ben has been added to her prayer list, don’t you?”
Rebecca glanced over at the man and then back to her mother. “I do. He’s kind of become her hero since he caught her that day.”
“I figured as much. And that’s good. Every girl needs one.”
And every woman needed a hero, too. But Rebecca couldn’t allow herself to start thinking of Ben that way. “I’m going up now.”
“Good night, dear.”
“Night, Mama.” Rebecca turned back to the others in the room. “See you all tomorrow.”
She left the room with a chorus of “Good night” behind her and headed up the stairs.
Rebecca quietly entered Jenny’s room and looked down on her daughter. One arm was flung over her head, and her even breathing told Rebecca she was sleeping peacefully. She leaned down and planted a kiss on her forehead and almost wished Jenny would wake up so she could tell her she loved her. But Jenny slept on and Rebecca didn’t disturb her dreams.
She tiptoed to the bathroom separating their rooms and pulled the door shut most of the way, but left it open enough to hear Jenny should she awake in the night. Not that she would, but Rebecca had shared a room with her for so long that she couldn’t bring herself to shut the doors between them at night, except while she readied herself for bed.
Still a little chilled, she made quick work of it and opened the door once more. She went to her bedside and knelt to say her prayers, thanking the Lord for her daughter, for being reunited with her family and for forgiving her for bringing them pain.
And then she whispered, “Dear Lord, please comfort Ben tonight. I know it couldn’t have been easy for him to open up to me and tell me about his mother. The memories must be terribly painful for him. Please give him peace. In Jesus’ precious name, amen.”
Rebecca slid beneath the covers and pulled them up high. Then she closed her eyes and listened...yes, in the quiet of the night she could hear Jenny’s light breathing. She smiled and turned over. What would she do without her?
People around her in the tenements had urged Rebecca to give her up when she began showing—put her in an orphanage like Ben’s mother had done. And she had given it some thought. But much as she knew she’d done wrong by trusting Jenny’s father, she couldn’t add to her sins by deserting her child.
She wondered what it had been like for Ben when he was Jenny’s age...to know that he’d been left on the doorstep of an orphanage and that his own mother had deserted him. Her heart squeezed tight just thinking of it. Still, he’d grown up to be a wonderful man—but without the love of his mother. Suddenly, the tears Rebecca had fought when Ben told her about what his mother had done flooded her eyes and she buried her head in her pillow and wept for him.
* * *
Ben didn’t tarry in the parlor long after Rebecca left. He went down to his room thinking back over her remark at the café about some of the women being sweet on him. The thought had him a bit unsettled. He sincerely hoped not. He tried to be very careful not to give the impression that he might be attracted to any of them, because he truly didn’t return any interest like that. He wasn’t there to find romance—he wanted to help those women better their lives. He cared about them to that extent only.
However...Rebecca was different. Something about her touched him in a way no one else ever had; otherwise, he’d never have been so open with her tonight. He couldn’t put a name to what drew him to her, but the pull was strong and tonight he’d had to remind himself that he’d vowed never to fall in love again.
But the way Rebecca had reached out to him after he’d told her about his mother abandoning him, and her effort to comfort him with her assurance that his mother must have thought she had no choice had him on the verge of rethinking the vow he’d made.
Only for a moment, though, because Rebecca seemed to draw away and whatever dreams he’d thought to weave had disappeared before they ever formed. Which was probably for the best—he couldn’t let himself begin to care too much for her.
Ben