stood a chance, God rest its soul. The newspapers had had a field day writing about Eddie’s faux pas, the headlines screaming ‘Gangland boss in double slaying’.
As soon as Eddie had realised his fatal mistake, he’d immediately tried to take his own life. Unfortunately for him, Jessica’s brother Raymond had lunged at him and knocked the gun away. Eddie had still managed to pull the trigger, but the bullet had whizzed through his shoulder, not his brains, as he’d intended it to.
Waking up in hospital and realising he was still alive was the worst moment of Eddie’s life. Jessica was his world and he just couldn’t live without her.
Consumed by grief and guilt, Eddie immediately admitted what he’d done to the filth. Seven days he’d then spent in hospital under police guard. Once well enough to leave, he’d been carted off to Wandsworth nick.
Eddie was shoved into a cell with an Indian guy who introduced himself as Raj Malik. Company was the last thing Ed needed or wanted. He couldn’t even eat, let alone talk.
The screws must have read Eddie’s mind when they put him on suicide watch. The pain caused by his blunder was unbearable, and if he could have found something to top himself with, he’d have done it without a second thought.
Eddie had been with Jessica for over seventeen years, and from the moment he first clapped eyes on her, he’d known she was destined to become the love of his life. She was everything a man could want in a woman. She was beautiful on the outside and had a soul to match.
Overall, their marriage was an extremely happy one. Like most contented couples, they’d had their ups and downs over the years, but their love for one another had always remained intact.
Tall, with dark hair and a rugged complexion, Eddie had looked like a scar-faced giant beside his pretty, petite wife. They’d looked good together, though. Everybody used to comment on what a striking couple they made.
Jessica had fallen pregnant within months of them meeting. Eddie married her weeks later, and even though he already had two sons from a previous relationship, he had never felt as content as the day Jess had given birth to their twins.
Frankie and Joey were sixteen now and Eddie knew that he’d lost their love and respect for ever. How could he even consider contacting them when he’d so brutally wiped out their mother’s life?
Feeling a shiver go down his spine, Ed sat bolt upright, hugged his knees and laid his head against them. He was forty-eight years old, his life was all but over, and he wished he was fucking dead.
That fateful night would haunt him for ever. It was on his mind every second of every day. Even sleep didn’t release him from his burden, because his nightmares replayed the tragedy over and over again.
As the screw opened the flap to check on him again, Eddie snapped out of his trance. Knowing the letter was under the mattress was doing his head in. He ripped open the envelope and began to digest the words.
Hi Ed,
This is probably the hardest thing that I’ll ever have to write and you’ll ever have to read.
Before I begin, I just want you to know that I don’t blame or hate you for what happened. If anyone knew how much you loved Jessica, that person was me.
Anyway, I thought it only right to inform you that the police have now agreed to release Jessica’s body. All the funeral arrangements are now in place, and Jess will be laid to rest at 2.30 p.m. next Wednesday in Upminster Cemetery.
Dad wanted Jess to be buried next to his father over in Plaistow, but Mum didn’t want her to go there. She insisted that the happiest days of Jessica’s life were spent in Rainham, so her resting place should be as near to there as possible.
I know with everything that’s happened, it’s impossible for you to attend the service, but I want you to know that I’ve ordered a beautiful wreath on your behalf. I’ve enclosed the card, in case you wanted to write it personally. Don’t worry if you’re not up to it, as I can write one for you.
Mum and Dad have temporarily moved into your house. I hope this is OK with you. Let me know if it isn’t. It was Mum’s idea. She said that her house wasn’t roomy enough for the kids and they’d had enough upheaval without moving them away from their friends. She also said that living at yours makes her feel closer to Jessica.
I’ve been keeping an eye on Frankie and Joey and both seem to be coping in their own way. They’ve barely left the house, so hopefully Frankie might be tiring of Jed.
I hope you don’t think badly of me, but I really ain’t up to visiting you at the moment. I know Gary and Ricky have been to see you and they’re coming again next week, so I know you’ve got visitors. What I’ll do is wait till all the press interest dies down, and then I’ll pop up and see you.
I know what happened is awful for you, but you must try and be strong for Jessica’s sake. My sister loved you very much, and she’d want you to hold it together for the sake of the twins, Ed.
I know it must seem impossible, but try to keep your chin up, mate.
Thinking of you, Raymondo
As he stared at the condolence card, Ed was overcome by grief. ‘In deepest sympathy’ it said. Screwing the card and the letter up, he let out a painful sob.
With visions of his wife’s mutilated body firmly in his mind, he leaped off the bed and, overcome by grief, repeatedly smashed his head against the cell wall.
‘Jessica, Jessica’ he shouted, as blood began to trickle down his forehead.
As two prison officers ran in, Eddie lashed out at them. He didn’t want to be restrained, he wanted to end his misery once and for all.
Two more screws suddenly appeared out of nowhere and, finally overpowered, Eddie sank to his knees.
‘I don’t wanna live any more. Please just let me fucking top meself,’ he screamed.
Joycie Smith finished off her outfit by adding the black netted hat, then studied her appearance in the full-length mirror. She was so glad she’d bought the new black dress and jacket. It looked very smart and she was determined to do her daughter proud. Moving closer, Joyce noticed how red raw and puffy her eyes looked. She’d had a good old cry this morning – in private, of course. There’d be no tears in front of Stanley and the twins. She had to be brave for their sake.
Joyce put on her tinted glasses and headed downstairs. The flowers had just started to arrive, and she wanted to arrange them neatly. She had to keep herself busy, it was the only way. Not only that, she was determined that her daughter would have the best send-off ever.
Stanley sat in his newly built pigeon shed and stared at his beloved birds. He was all ready – he even had his new suit on – but he’d rather leave Joyce to deal with the tributes.
Putting his head in his hands, Stanley broke down for the third time that morning. The flowers arriving made everything seem so final.
Jessica’s death had torn a huge hole in all of their lives. What had happened that night was nigh on impossible to understand, and living hell were the only words Stanley could find to describe life since. There wasn’t a parent in the world who imagined outliving their children, and he was no different.
Stanley had disliked Eddie Mitchell from the word go, but now he despised him with a resentful passion. Living in his house was a constant reminder of the murdering bastard, but it was Joycie’s decision and he’d had very little say in the matter.
As his two favourite pigeons, Ernie and Ethel, both cooed at him, Stanley lifted his head, wiped his eyes and smiled sadly. Seconds later, he heard his wife’s dulcet tones.
‘Stanley! Get your arse out that shed. Raymond and Polly have just arrived.’
Taking a deep breath, Stanley stood up. He was