mug that’d been meant for her. “Are you already regretting the vow of celibacy you took last night?” Karlee asked.
Since Dylan had been in midmumble to thank her, it took him a moment to hear what she’d said. As bad as he needed the coffee—and he needed it—he didn’t gulp any down just so he could say, “Wh-what?”
Karlee whipped out her phone from her pocket and pulled up a video. Of him.
“I, Dylan Granger,” he slurred on the video, “do hereby take a vow of celibacy for the next month.” He’d only pronounced two of those words correctly. “No form of sex whatsoever. If I fail, then I agree to carry out the donation.”
“I’m guessing lots of alcohol was involved in this,” Karlee said. It wasn’t a question. “Especially since you sent it to me shortly after midnight.”
Oh yes, alcohol had been involved. He’d been drunk, and Lucian hadn’t been, which meant his turd-head brother had likely been the one to come up with this stupid idea.
“Do you remember doing this?” Karlee pressed.
Unfortunately, he did. Now that his head was clearing some, more of what’d happened was coming back to him. But it was coming back as impaired, jumbled memories that Dylan wasn’t especially eager to remember.
“The last time you got drunk was what...three years ago?” Karlee went on. “That’s when you ended up staying in a hotel in San Antonio, and you called me to come and get you. You didn’t remember much of anything then.”
He had indeed ended up in a hotel after a party and had called Karlee the morning after when he couldn’t find his truck. But that hadn’t been because of tequila shots but rather a bad reaction to some prescription cold meds. The pills had knocked him on his butt.
“What’s the donation?” Karlee, again. Her forehead bunched up. “It’s not like to a sperm bank, is it?”
No, thank God. This didn’t involve anything that would require him to lower his zipper. “Fifty grand to be donated to the Wrangler’s Creek Charity Rodeo.”
Karlee’s mouth quivered as she fought back a smile. She lost that fight. Smiled. Then, she laughed. And she kept on laughing until Dylan glared at her.
“Sorry,” she mumbled, but she was clearly still trying to hold back a giggle. “But you’ve never come close to lasting a month. What will the rodeo committee do with all that extra money?”
Dylan wanted to believe that was a dilemma that the committee would never face, but Karlee was right. He’d never lasted that long. Still, it was probably time he took on this challenge. Time he gave up booze completely, too.
“Where’s Lucian?” Dylan asked after he got some more coffee in him.
“He’s here at the house, in his office.” Karlee checked the time on her phone. “He wants to see you, but he’ll be leaving in about a half hour for San Antonio.”
There was nothing unusual about any of those three things she’d just told him. Lucian only lived part-time at the ranch, which meant he was always coming and going. Though there’d likely be no going today until he’d seen Dylan. Which was fine because now that he had seen the video and had some coffee, Dylan wanted to confront his big brother about what part he’d played in that vow.
“When I came in earlier, I saw what appeared to be bits and pieces of a pair of shredded red panties by the back porch,” Karlee added. “Should I ask about them?”
“Only if you can tell me who they belong to.” He saw the concern flash through her eyes so he added, “There’s a naked woman in my bedroom.”
The concern vanished, and she had a fight with another smile. “Your celibacy didn’t last long.”
“I think it did. I woke up like this.” He fanned his hands over his fully clothed body, and then pointed to his closed zipper.
Of course, if Lucian knew about the naked woman, and Dylan was betting he did, then there was no way his brother would believe that sex hadn’t happened. That meant Lucian would try to hold him to the stupid celibacy agreement.
And to that rodeo donation.
Lucian might have even planted the naked woman in Dylan’s room. Though this kind of prank seemed more suited to a teenager than a grown man.
Dylan didn’t mind giving the money to the rodeo. It was for a good cause since they used the profits to fund the hospital library and such. In fact, he made an anonymous donation every year. He just didn’t want the money tied to his sex life or a drunken vow.
Karlee gave his arm a pat. “Have you actually thought about the wacky notion of giving up on all this frat boy behavior and settling down?”
Even though Karlee hadn’t meant for it to happen, that gave him some instant bad memories. He’d tried settling down, once, and he had the wedding band in his dresser drawer to prove it.
Since there was no way Dylan wanted to talk about that, he just flashed Karlee one of his grins. The kind that made men smile back and women blush. Karlee didn’t blush, but she did shake her head.
“Just hang in there,” she said. “Once Lucian is back in San Antonio, I’ll try to keep him as slammed as I can with meetings and such so he’ll get his nose out of the ranch business.”
Dylan wanted to kiss her. Not in the way he wanted to kiss most attractive women. And Karlee was indeed attractive. But he didn’t feel that way about her.
Plus, she was also in love with Lucian. Or in strong “like” anyway.
She had felt that way about Lucian for as long as Dylan could remember. Why, he didn’t know. Apparently neither did Lucian because Dylan was positive that his thickheaded big brother had no idea whatsoever how his assistant felt about him.
“Oh, and when you see Lucian,” she added, “it’s okay to talk about the celibacy-donation pact, but it’s best not to bring up anything about the rodeo itself.”
Since that was an event Lucian looked forward to every year, her words surprised him. “Has he actually decided not to compete since he loses every year anyway?”
Karlee shook her head. “Not a chance that he’d drop out of it. But first thing this morning, he was practicing his bronc riding skills and got thrown hard. His family jewels and pride took a bruising.”
Dylan would definitely rub that in. It was the brotherly thing to do.
He topped off his quart of coffee, thanked Karlee again and made his way to Lucian’s office, which was at the other end of the house from Dylan’s. Instead of feng shui, Dylan had gone with the “out of sight, out of mind” approach when choosing his work space. He got along best with Lucian when they weren’t in the same general vicinity.
Lucian’s door was open, and before Dylan could even step inside, he heard his brother growl, “There was a bra and a dress on the front porch this morning.”
Obviously, Lucian had missed the strappy silver shoes. “They’re mine.” Dylan said it with as much cockiness as he could manage. It also had more than a smidge of anger since he wasn’t especially happy with Lucian right now.
“You’ve started cross-dressing?” Lucian managed some cockiness of his own.
“Yeah, I started it right about the time you decided to get me to take a vow of celibacy when I was drunk.”
“A vow you’ve already broken. There’s a naked or seminaked woman in your bedroom, isn’t there?”
Since Lucian almost certainly knew the answer to that, Dylan went with the truth. “Yeah, but I don’t know who she is, and I didn’t have sex with her. I’m figuring you planted her there. Maybe even paid her.”
Lucian gave him a flat look. “I wouldn’t have to plant or pay. Naked women gravitate toward you and your bed.