Brian Aldiss

The Complete Short Stories: The 1960s


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when one awakens in a strange room that one cannot momentarily identify

      SHAK ALE MAN The struggle that takes place in the night between the urge to urinate and the urge to continue sleeping

      SHAK LA MAN GRA When the urge to urinate takes precedence over the urge to continue sleeping

      SHAK LO MUN GRAM When the urge to continue sleeping takes

      precedence over all things

      SHEAN DORL Gazing at one’s reflection for reasons other than vanity

      SHE EAN MIK Performing prohibited postures before a mirror

      SHEM A slight cold afflicting only one nostril; the thoughts that pass when one shakes hands with a politician

      SHUK TACK The shortening in life-stature a man incurs from a

      seemingly benevolent machine

      SOBI A reverie lasting less than twenty years on cosmological themes; a nickel

      SODI DORL One machine making way for another; decadence,

      particularly in the Cold Continents

      SODI IN PIT Any epithet which does not accurately convey what it

      intends, such as ‘Sober as a judge’, ‘Silly nit’, ‘He swims like a fish’, ‘He’s only half-alive’, and so on

      STAINI RACK NUSVIODON Experiencing Staini Rack Nuul and then realising that one must continue in the same outworn fashion because the alternatives are too frightening, or because one is too weak to change; wearing a suit of clothes at which one sees strangers looking askance

      STAINI RACK NUUL Introspection (sometimes prompted by birthdays) that one is not living as one determined to live when one was very young; or, on the other hand, realising that one is living in a mode decided upon when one was very young and which is now no longer applicable or appropriate

      STAIN TOK I The awareness that one is helplessly living a role

      STA SODON The worst feelings which do not even lead to suicide

      SU SODA VALKUS A sudden realisation that one’s spirit is not pure, overcoming one on Mount Rinvlak (in the Southern Continent)

      TI Civilised aggression

      TIG GAG The creature most like man in the Southern Continent which smiles as it sleeps

      TIPY LAP KIN Laughter that one recognises though the laughter is

      unseen; one’s own laughter in a crisis

      TOK AN Suddenly divining the nature and imminence of old age in one’s thirty-first year

      TUAN BOLO A class of people one only meets at weddings; the pleasure of feeling rather pale

      TU KI TOK Moments of genuine joy captured in a play or charade about joy; the experience of youthful delight in old age

      TUZ PAT MAIN (Obs.) The determination to eat one’s maternal

      grandfather

      U (Obs.) The amount of time it takes for a lizard to turn into a bird; love

      UBI A girl who lifts her skirts at the very moment you wish she would

      UDI KAL The clothes of the woman one loves

      UDI UKAL The body of the woman one loves

      UES WE TEL DA Love between a male and female politician

      UGI SLO GU The love that needs a little coaxing

      UMI RIN TOSIT The sensations a woman experiences when she does not know how she feels about a man

      UMY RIN RU The new dimensions that take on illusory existence when the body of the loved woman is first revealed

      UNIMGAG BU Love of oneself that passes understanding; a machine’s dream

      UNK TAK An out-of-date guide book; the skin shed by the snake that predicts rain

      UPANG PLA Consciousness that one’s agonised actions undertaken for love would look rather funny to one’s friends

      UPANG PLAP Consciousness that while one’s agonised actions undertaken for love are on the whole rather funny to oneself, they might even look heroic to one’s friends; a play with a cast of three or less

      U RI RHI Two lovers drunk together

      USANA NUTO A novel all about love, written by a computer

      USAN I NUT Dying for love

      USAN I ZUN BI Living for love; a tropical hurricane arriving from over the sea, generally at dawn

      UZ Two very large people marrying after the prime of life

      UZ TO KARDIN The realisation in childhood that one is the issue of two very large people who married after the prime of life

      WE FAAK A park or a college closed for seemingly good reasons; a city where one wishes one could live

      YA GAG Too much education; a digestive upset during travel

      YA GAG LEE Apologies offered by a hostess for a bad meal

      YA GA TUZ Bad meat; (Obs.) dirty fingernails

      YAG ORN A president

      YATUZ PATI (Obs.) The ceremony of eating one’s maternal grandfather

      YATUZ SHAK SHAK NAPANG HOLI NUN Lying with one’s maternal grandmother; when hens devour their young

      YE FLIC TOT A group of men smiling and congratulating each other

      YE FLU GAN Philosophical thoughts that don’t amount to much;

      graffiti in a place of worship

      YON TORN A paper tiger; two children with one toy

      YON U SAN The hesitation a boy experiences before first kissing his first girl

      YOR KIN BE A house; a circumlocution; a waterproof hat; the smile of a slightly imperfect wife

      YUP PA A book in which everything is understandable except the author’s purpose in writing it

      YUPPA GA Stomach ache masquerading as eyestrain; a book in which nothing is understandable except the author’s purpose in writing it

      YUTH MOD The assumed bonhomie of visitors and strangers

      ZO ZO CON A woman in another field

       The Dead Immortal

      Mickie Houston was strikingly self-centred. But with his looks, his voice and his style – and his wife – he had gone far. And meant to go further.

      Rickie Houston was strikingly beautiful. She looked even more lovely than usual as she said to her husband, ‘Don’t take the time-travel drug, darling. I have a terrible feeling it will kill you!’

      Mickie Houston kissed her and said, ‘And I have a terrific feeling it may make me immortal!’

      The exchange was overheard by a gossip columnist, and soon became famous. Not only was the controversy over the new time-travel drug raging (for this was in 1969), but Rickie and Mickie were the toasts of the switched-on pop world, the duo who finally knocked the groups from the charts.

      The extra publicity encouraged Mickie to go ahead with his idea. He went to the famous London clinic where the drug was being administered to the few who were reckless or rich enough to pay for the injection.

      The specialist shook his head and said gravely, ‘The effects of LSKK, the so-called time-travel drug, are very strange, Mr Houston. It’s not an experience to be undertaken lightly. We have a duty to warn any potential time-travellers that they take their life in their hands when they undergo the injection.’

      ‘Yeah, I heard all that jazz from my wife.’

      ‘Really? What your wife may not have told you is