sort of guy. But Grace had made him feel comfortable. She had an air about her that never judged or condescended.
She’d helped him realize how damn pissed off he was that he’d almost died. That Damien Freihof had almost killed him. That it was only sheer blind luck Roman was alive today.
And that all those feelings were normal.
“Am I acting crazy, Doc?”
Grace gave a delicate shrug. “You’re acting aware and vigilant. Again, nothing wrong with that.”
“I just want to catch this son of a bitch.” Roman gritted his teeth just thinking about Freihof.
Steve squeezed his shoulder. “Your medical doctor said you would be clear for active duty next week.”
Roman noticed Steve didn’t say anything about Grace clearing him mentally. His behavior here tonight wasn’t helping. He all but itched with the desire to get back out with his SWAT team on active missions. Desk work was killing him one minute at a time. But active duty was a no-go until he was cleared by both the Omega physician and the psychiatrist.
“Okay, I’ve got a beautiful family who need my attention.” Steve grinned as he looked to where his new wife held their two-week-old son at one of the tables surrounding the dance floor. “Roman, you let me know if you think something’s not right. But on the other hand, you’re not the only one on duty tonight. Hell, you’re not even on duty at all.”
Roman and Grace watched Steve walk across the room to his family. Neither of them said anything right away. Roman was going to try to outwait the older woman, but knew that she would win that battle. The psychiatrist had much more practice at the waiting-out-silence game.
“I noticed Steve said that I’d be physically cleared for active duty next week, but he didn’t say anything about being cleared by you,” Roman finally said, not looking at Grace.
“Do you think you’re ready for duty, mentally? Emotionally?” she asked.
“I know that sitting at a desk is doing more harm to my mental health than being active and back out with the team would do.”
“And is that what you think I should say in my report?” Grace raised one eyebrow.
Roman had long since learned that almost every statement he gave to Grace would result in another question from her. It didn’t bother him anymore. He knew it was just her way of getting him to think through answers for himself.
Grace Parker was a brilliant psychiatrist. She worked with all sorts of people at Omega Sector: agents, victims, and had even acted as the SWAT team’s medical doctor in a few emergency situations. If she wasn’t twenty or so years older than his own thirty-one, he might have made a move on her long before now. Not that she would’ve taken him up on the offer.
“You want me to say whether I think I’m ready or not,” Roman said.
“Ultimately, that’s what really matters, isn’t it?”
“Not on the piece of paper, it’s not. Only your opinion matters, not mine.” Roman trusted Grace to give an honest judgment and not hold him back if she thought he was fit for duty.
But damn it, he wanted so badly to be back out in the field he could practically taste it.
“Do you think that I think you’re ready?” she asked, turning toward him.
“I would hope so.”
“Do you think I think you think I think you’re ready?”
Roman tried to wrap his brain around that statement, until he realized Grace was grinning.
“Now you’re just messing with me,” he said, shaking his head.
Her soft laughter rang out. “Guilty.”
Roman smiled now, too, the tension broken. “That’s not very nice, you know.”
“If it helps, I wouldn’t tease you about it if I didn’t think you were prepared to join the team in active missions.” Grace said.
“Really?” Roman turned to face her more fully.
“Steve didn’t mention me clearing you for duty, because I cleared you over a month ago.” She smiled at him. “Mentally, I think you’ve been ready for a long time. You just needed to give your body some time to rebuild and restrengthen.”
“So I’m cleared?” Roman felt tension he’d held for weeks melt off him.
“Yep. As soon as your physician says so.”
“You don’t think it’s a little odd that I’m wearing two weapons here tonight, and wandering from shadow to shadow to make sure Damien Freihof isn’t somewhere in the building?”
Grace shook her head. “I’ll admit it might be a little bit hyperdiligent. But I promise you, you are not the only person here with two weapons. And you are not the only person here searching the shadows every few minutes. Including the groom.”
Roman looked around the room. Grace was probably right. He’d been so caught up in his own need to be sedulous that he hadn’t realized there were a dozen others being just as watchful.
“Now, believe it or not, I actually have a date to get back to.” Grace smiled again, tilting her head toward a man in his early sixties sitting at a table nearby. Grace’s husband had died a few years before and Roman was glad she was seeing someone socially.
“Thank you, Grace. Sometimes it’s hard to stay centered.”
“That’s what I’m here for. That’s what we’re all here for. For each other. You’ve got to remember you’re not in this alone. I think that is what Damien Freihof most wants to do—isolate us and fracture us. It’s important that we don’t let that happen.”
Roman nodded. “You’re right. I’ll try to relax, at least a little bit tonight.”
“Aren’t your mother and stepfather here? Do you want to spend some time with them?”
Roman refrained from rolling his eyes. Barely. “No, I’d rather sit here and look for invisible bad guys than go hang with my mom and Maxwell, and listen to all the reasons why I should be rubbing elbows with the bigwigs in the room.”
Grace laughed. “Well, the state political VIPs are definitely here en masse. And I know you’ve said your mom would much rather you had gone into politics than be a member of the Omega SWAT team.”
“Whether I wanted to or not.”
Grace shrugged. “Regardless, they are family. Don’t cut them out.”
“Trust me, I couldn’t cut them out if I wanted to. If you see my mom, don’t tell her where I am.”
Grace grinned again. “Will do. And Roman, it’s a wedding. It’s okay to have fun, maybe talk to a girl—like that gorgeous one you’ve been checking out all night whenever you let your guard ease enough to think about something other than Freihof.”
Roman knew exactly who she meant. Keira Spencer. The raven-haired, curvy, petite bridesmaid. One of the bride’s friends from high school or something. His attention had been drawn to her tonight like it had at the last few social functions he’d seen her at, as friends of Brandon and Andrea. He would’ve asked her out long before now if his plans hadn’t been waylaid by the whole coma thing.
His eyes left the shadows and sought out the dark-haired beauty now. Like him, she was standing mostly away from the action of the wedding, although he doubted it was for the same reason.
“Exactly,” Grace said, touching Roman gently on his arm. “Freihof wants all our attention to be on him, not on living our lives. Let’s not give him that satisfaction.”
With that she gave him one more smile and made her way back to her date, who politely stood and held out her chair as she sat