But I refuse to apologize for using every trick in the book, dirty or otherwise, to find my child. She is what matters here, not my feelings and not yours.”
To her horror she felt two tears slide gracelessly down her hot cheeks. He swore beneath his breath and his hold tightened until she was cradled against the hard wall of his chest. His fingers wound through her hair in a comforting caress. “Don’t, please.”
It was the sort of embrace she might have used to comfort Genie. Yet without Zoe being sure when or how it happened, it swiftly turned into something more. She knew she was vulnerable and her judgment was not to be trusted at this moment, but neither could she deny the lightning flash of awareness that arced between them as his hands slid down her neck and settled on her trembling shoulders.
It came as absolutely no surprise when his lips found the top of her head. Rather, it felt almost inevitable, as if the awareness she had sensed the moment she opened the door to him was no more than a prelude to finding herself in his arms.
Her pulses went haywire as his lips traveled to her forehead. Slowly the shudder of suppressed sobs became something deeper, more elemental. It took every bit of self-control she possessed to remember who he was and why she was in his embrace.
Genie.
Desperately she focused on her child’s name and felt her strength of will flowing back. As soon as she placed her palms against the padded muscle of his shoulders, he released her. But he remained no more than a step away as if expecting her to crumble again, his hair-trigger reflexes set to catch her.
“I’m sorry,” she said as if apologizing only for the momentary weakness.
His quick, wry smile stressed his understanding of her need to deny what they both knew had just happened. It was an explosive situation. Emotions were running at fever-pitch. His expression told her he didn’t believe she was apologizing for her weakness any more than she did, but he was decent enough to let it serve. “No need for apologies,” he said, finally moving away so she could release the breath she’d been unaware of holding. “It’s a tough situation all around.”
Holding all the cards, he could afford to be generous. Still she couldn’t dismiss the gentleness with which he’d held her or the fiery way his lips had burned through her skin when he kissed her.
Spying on her to gain his own ends made him no better than Andrew, she reminded herself although it was an effort. The thought gave her the courage to meet his gaze. “Will you give me some time? I need to examine your documents…” Her voice trailed off. The paperwork was almost certainly in order. A man like James Langford wouldn’t make his move until he knew it was the right one. She was the one who needed time to come to terms with a life forever changed.
Then she needed to prepare Genie to deal with another huge upheaval in a short life that had already seen more disruption than was good for her. That was going to be the most heart-tearing job of all.
James nodded reluctantly. “Take whatever time you need. The papers are self-explanatory, but you can ask me anything and I’ll do my best to answer.”
Only one question burned in her mind: how could he do this to her? It was the one question she couldn’t ask and he wouldn’t answer. Because he had already dismissed it as irrelevant. She was a painful but necessary step in his quest to retrieve his child.
“In the meantime,” he continued implacably, “I want to see Genevieve.”
Zoe felt the color drain from her face. “You aren’t going to simply tell her who you are?”
James locked gazes with her. “What do you think I am? No, don’t answer. If it helps you to cast me as the villain, go right ahead. But it won’t dissuade me from getting to know her again so she can accept me into her life. There will be time enough for the whole story when she’s ready to cope with it.”
He was being fairer than she had any right to expect. And he was right, she was trying to cast him as the villain, if only to have a target for her distress. The real villain was Ruth for involving them all in this terrible situation in which there could be no real winners.
Zoe nodded painfully. “You have the right to see her, of course.” More than she herself did if it came down to it. Inspiration came to her. “I’m taking her to our local street fair on Saturday. One of the highlights is a charity auction I’m involved in. Could you meet us there? It won’t seem as strange to her as if you came here.”
His expression underwent a sea change. Too late she realized how revealing her suggestion must look to him. She had as good as admitted that she wasn’t in the habit of introducing strange men to Genie. Her pride balked at such an admission. Would he think she had succumbed to his embrace because she was starved for affection? It shouldn’t matter what he thought. She only knew it did.
“I mean, I don’t want to give her the wrong idea about you and me…about us.” She stumbled on.
A glimmer of amusement lit his vivid blue gaze. “Heaven forbid she should get the wrong idea about…us,” he said with a mocking lilt. Then he drew himself back to business. “The street fair is a good idea. I would wish to see her sooner, but perhaps we all need the time to adjust.”
For a moment his face became shadowed and a depth of longing almost beyond bearing darkened his eyes. The ache around Zoe’s heart grew as she realized she was asking him to wait yet another couple of days for a reunion that had already been postponed beyond most people’s endurance.
It was on the tip of her tongue to say, “Wait, she’ll be home in a little while. You don’t have to endure another day without seeing her.” But it was her own yearning speaking, so she closed her lips on the betraying words. No doubt he would have accepted her offer with alacrity, and part of her admitted the justice in making it. But she wasn’t ready yet. According him his due as Genie’s father was harder than anything she’d ever been asked to do.
It spelled the end of her life with her child. The end of her world.
The offer remained unspoken as she walked him to the door. She was distantly aware that they made some sort of arrangement to meet at the fair, but the details barely registered with her. Somehow she knew that James wouldn’t forget. He didn’t have her reasons.
The documents proving Genie’s parentage stared up at her in mute accusation when she went back inside. She looked at them for a long time before forcing herself to reach for the folder.
Chapter Three
To Zoe it felt like a century since James had dropped his bombshell about Genie, but in reality only two days had passed by the time the day of the street fair dawned. They were the longest two days of Zoe’s life. Over and over she asked herself why she had agreed to meet James at the fair?
She had little choice, she acknowledged as she went through the motions of getting ready to go. The alternative—inviting James to her home again—was even more unsettling.
He had a right to see his child. Even Zoe couldn’t deny the fact. But he didn’t have to see her under Zoe’s roof. A public place was better, she told herself. Neutral ground. He would see what a wonderful mother she was and decide to leave Genie where she was.
And pigs might fly.
She started as a small figure appeared at her bedroom door. “I’m ready, Mummy. Can we go now?” The child jiggled up and down with impatience.
Zoe swallowed the maternal pride that threatened to swamp her. “As soon as I’m ready, sweetheart. I won’t be long.”
Genie’s features creased with suspicion. “You’re wearing your best dress, and your hair’s all funny and crinkly. You won’t be able to go on the Ferris wheel with me.”
Zoe dropped to her knees beside the little girl. “Of course I will. I felt like dressing up and curling my hair because…well, just because.” Impressing James Langford had absolutely nothing to do with it, she told herself.
Genie’s