uncomfortable evening, Caleb was about to take him up on it when Big Max suddenly looked a whole lot less feisty. “Is everything okay?” Caleb asked him, worried by the sudden uncertainty he saw in the older man’s eyes.
“Sure. Why wouldn’t it be? You’re the one acting crazy tonight,” Big Max grumbled. “Don’t know why you showed up here in the middle of the week, anyway.”
Caleb regarded him with real concern now. “Max, it’s Sunday night, same as always,” he said gently. “You asked me about church not two minutes ago.”
Big Max looked flustered, but he covered it with anger. “Of course it is. Stop trying to confuse me. Go on, now. I’m going to bed.”
Caleb wasn’t about to leave, not unless there was someone else around. “Is your housekeeper here?”
Max glowered at him. “Why do you care about that? You hoping Jessie will send you home with another piece of pie?”
“Exactly,” Caleb said, unwilling to admit that he wanted to be sure that there would be someone nearby in case something really was wrong.
“Well, I sent her home, so you’re out of luck,” Max said ungraciously. “Now, stop dillydallying and go.”
“I wouldn’t mind staying for a while,” Caleb offered. “That drink you made went to my head. I’d like to make myself a cup of coffee.”
Though the old man would never admit it, Caleb thought he detected relief in Max’s expression.
“Knew you couldn’t take a real drink,” Max gloated. “Stay here. I’ll make the coffee. I know my way around the kitchen.”
He left Caleb sitting alone, staring after him, concern suddenly eating away at him. Tonight wasn’t the first time Max had seemed a little…off-kilter. Caleb had chalked up all the other incidents to mere forgetfulness, but tonight he had to wonder if it might not be something more.
Then again, Max insisted on living out here all alone. He rarely ventured into town anymore, not even for the board meetings he was expected to attend. He’d turned into a recluse, but most people in town talked about his behavior as nothing more than the eccentricity of a wealthy man.
George Winslow ignored Max’s bad temper and lack of welcome and continued to visit from time to time. Caleb came by regularly, but if others dropped in, Caleb didn’t know about them. It was little wonder Big Max occasionally lost track of what day of the week it was. He supposed that the real surprise was that it didn’t happen more often.
When Max came back, he brought a Coca-Cola loaded with ice. “Here you go,” he said. “That ought to fix you up.”
Caleb accepted the cold drink and dutifully took a sip, trying his best to hide his shaken reaction. Had Big Max concluded that coffee was too much trouble? Or had he simply forgotten why he’d gone into the kitchen in the first place?
6
Amanda rarely set foot in Caleb’s office, mostly because there were so many other opportunities to see him. Unfortunately, ever since that Saturday when he’d been so obviously upset, he’d been avoiding her and the kids. Afraid that she’d inadvertently said or done something to offend him or that he was going through some sort of personal crisis and needed help he’d never ask for, she concluded it was time to take action.
As soon as she left her job at the boutique, she set off for the church. Nadine and George, who’d unexpectedly turned themselves into surrogate grandparents for Susie, Larry and Jimmy, were taking the kids to a movie, so Amanda had the entire evening to wrangle the truth out of Caleb.
On her arrival and drawn by some emotion she couldn’t quite explain, she wandered into the church, rather than going in search of Caleb. Only dim lights near the altar lit the way. She liked it in shadows like this. It felt peaceful and oddly welcoming to someone like her, someone not sure she had any right to be there, given her history and lack of faith.
She slipped into a pew toward the front and let the serenity steal over her. After the past couple of weeks, she needed a few minutes of solitude to gather her thoughts before facing Caleb and whatever secrets he was hiding from her. The kids had been a handful for days now. Even their teachers had called to complain, wondering if there might not be something wrong at home.
The only thing unusual that Amanda could point to was Caleb’s absence. Maybe this was a warning that her children were growing too dependent on him, expecting him to fulfill their need for a father. That was a burden he shouldn’t have to shoulder. Perhaps he’d sensed that himself and that was why he’d pulled back. It was something they needed to discuss.
As she wrestled with that, a side door opened softly, letting in a shaft of brighter light.
“Amanda!” Caleb said, obviously startled to find her there.
She jumped up guiltily. “I’m sorry. I probably shouldn’t be in here.”
He frowned at her reaction. “Why on earth shouldn’t you be here? The church is open to everyone. Sit back down. I can leave you alone, if you’d prefer.”
There it was, she thought, that compassionate tone that made her long for things she hadn’t had in a long time. She’d missed having someone to share her day with. She and Bobby had talked about everything after the kids were in bed, or at least she had assumed they had. It turned out she’d been wrong, but at the time, those talks had been the best part of her day.
More and more lately she’d looked to Caleb for that kind of sharing. Maybe she’d been leaning on him too much. That was something else they should discuss.
She looked into his worried eyes. “No, stay, please,” she said. “Actually I came to see you. I walked in here on impulse and it was so peaceful, I stayed.”
Caleb crossed to sit beside her. “What brought you here to see me? You don’t usually stop by the church.”
She gave him a wry smile. “Because you’re usually underfoot at the house. You haven’t been by for a while now.”
“I should be flattered that you’ve noticed,” he said, though he sounded anything but pleased. In fact, he looked uneasy. “I’ve been busy.”
“You’re always busy,” she noted. “That’s never kept you away before.”
He sighed, then looked directly into her eyes. “It’s not my absence that’s on your mind, is it? It’s something more specific.”
She thought about the question before answering. “The kids do miss you,” she said honestly. “They’ve been acting up in school this week. I think it’s because they’re feeling abandoned. Frankly, so am I.”
His expression troubled, he murmured, “I’m sorry. I should have thought of that and explained to them.”
Amanda regarded him with frustration. “Don’t you dare apologize, Caleb. You don’t owe us anything. You’ve already been more than generous with your time and everything else.” She studied him intently, then forced herself to ask him directly, “Are you afraid we’re all getting too attached to you, Caleb? Is that it? Because if it is, I understand. I’ll make the kids understand, too. We can’t rely on you to fill the void Bobby left in our lives. You’ve already done more than we have any right to expect.”
He frowned at her. “You and the kids haven’t expected anything from me that I haven’t been more than willing to give,” he said with unmistakable sincerity. “I’m not sure I can explain this so you’ll understand, but there have been some things going on that I needed to deal with.”
“Personal things?” she asked, watching him closely.
He never once met her eyes, but he nodded. “At least some of it. The rest has to do with other people.”
“And you couldn’t share with me whatever it is that relates just to you?” she asked. “I thought friends