be just—
‘Antonia, are you listening to me?’
‘Hmm?’ Antonia looked up, and then guiltily shook her head. ‘Forgive me, Papa, I was not. What were you saying?’
‘I was saying, that, quite apart from my reluctance to see you proceed with this, you should be aware that far more formidable objections may arise from the Earl of Carlyle himself. It is well known that he is loathe to take on female servants.’
That was a truism which Antonia had already been forced to consider. Apart from Lady Clara’s governess and Mrs Griffiths, the cook, there was not another female servant in the Earl of Carlyle’s employ, either here, or at his home in London.
‘I realise that the Earl is not generally known for his hiring of female staff,’ Antonia conceded, ‘but in this instance, I cannot help but feel that once he is made aware of all the advantages, he will have to recognise the wisdom of hiring me. For one thing, I am already acquainted with his daughter and get on with her exceedingly well. She trusts me, Papa, and you know how important that trust will be if I am to teach her to ride properly.’
‘I do not take exception to that, my dear, but that does not mean that Lord Carlyle will see it in a similar light. You must be prepared for the fact that he may dash your hopes far more quickly and effectively than I.’
It was an irrefutable point, and one which brought home to Antonia—as reluctant as she was to admit it—just how slim were the chances of her actually securing the position. She had not had any formal training in the teaching of young children, and it was an undeniable fact that nearly all riding masters were men.
She sighed, and clasped her slender hands together in front of her. ‘You are right, Papa. My wishing to work for the Earl does make little sense, and for any number of reasons. It was…foolish of me to bother you with it in the first place.’
‘My dear girl, I never said that you were bothering me. And I am certainly not telling you that you may not go and speak to the Earl, if that is truly what you wish to do.’
‘You are not?’
‘No. Because I know that if I do not allow you to do this, I shall be forced to listen to endless tales of woe regarding Lady Cruikshank’s horrible offspring or Lady Haversham’s appalling habits. And I think that such a litany of grief would be far more wearing on my patience than forbidding you to try for the position in the first place.’ Mr Hadley picked up his pen and fiddled with the nib. ‘I simply thought that…given what happened to…Edwina, you would have felt…differently about the position.’
Antonia glanced at her father, and realised that she had finally discovered what lay at the root of his concerns. ‘Dearest Papa. It is because of what happened to Edwina that I feel so strongly about this. I would hate to think that…but for a lack of training, such a terrible thing could happen to Clara.’
‘Yes, I see that, Antonia, and I can only commend your selflessness for wishing to become involved. I know that it will not be easy. That is why I say you may go and approach the Earl. In the end, he shall be the one to make the decision.’
‘Thank you, Papa, thank you!’ Antonia wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed the top of his head. ‘You are truly the best of fathers!’
‘Yes, well, I am sure there are many who would disagree with your assessment,’ he said ruefully. ‘I only hope that if your mother is looking down upon me now, she is not shaking her head and wondering at my giving you your way—again.’
Antonia smiled affectionately. ‘I do not see how she could be, Papa. You know that Mama always encouraged me to follow my heart. But I promise that you shall have no cause to regret your decision. The Earl is a wealthy man, and if I am fortunate enough to secure the position, I am sure he will be far more generous to his employees than would be either Lady Haversham or Lady Cruikshank.’
‘That remains to be seen, Antonia, as does whether or not you will even be invited to apply,’ Mr Hadley cautioned her. ‘But go and try your luck regardless. I wager I’ll hear soon enough what the Earl has to say.’
As Antonia dashed from the room, Mr Hadley paused in his writings and raised his eyes to the full-length portrait of his wife which hung on the wall opposite his desk. It was a particular favourite of his, for it had captured, at the very peak of her beauty, a woman who had loved deeply, and who had been deeply loved in return.
‘Yes, she is just like you, my dear. Headstrong and impulsive,’ Mr Hadley murmured affectionately. ‘Goodness knows, I could never stop you from doing what you truly wanted to either. But have I made a mistake by allowing her this freedom, Elizabeth? For as admirable as Antonia’s motives are, I fear that she may be in for something of a disappointment when she comes up against the Earl.’ Mr Hadley’s brows flickered a little. ‘Carlyle is not a happy man, beloved, nor an indulgent one. He has been…changed by the tragic events of the past. And I do believe that he is one gentleman who will not allow our dear girl to have her own way, every time she asks for it!’
Not surprisingly, Mr Hadley was not the only one to view his daughter’s choice of occupation with apprehension. Antonia’s closest friend, the Honourable Catherine Shand, was equally flabbergasted by the notion of Antonia seeking employment in the raffish Earl’s household, though for reasons of an entirely different nature.
‘Of course your father would be opposed to you working for the Earl,’ Catherine said as the two of them sat together in the Rose Room at Shand Hall later that day. ‘Apart from the fact that his only daughter is actively seeking employment, he cannot be pleased at knowing that the position she aspires to is in the Earl of Carlyle’s household.’
Antonia sighed. ‘Yes, I know. The Earl is not inclined towards hiring females.’
‘It is not only that, Toni. Lord Carlyle has gained a very bad reputation of late.’
‘A reputation? For what?’
Catherine set her cup down on the tray and moved to sit beside Antonia on the settee. ‘For wicked and dissolute behaviour!’
Antonia’s honey-tipped lashes flew up. ‘No!’
‘Oh, yes. Apparently, he has taken to staying out until all hours of the night, gambling at the very worst of the hells, and frequenting the most notorious of clubs. There were even rumours about his being challenged to a duel by a French Count, though details surrounding that particular contretemps are very difficult to come by.’
A shaft of late-afternoon sunlight suddenly pierced the room, bathing Antonia’s cap of honey-coloured curls in a warm golden light. ‘Is he still accepted by good Society?’ she asked.
‘Oh, to be sure. But when he does attend an event, he flirts with all of the eligible young ladies, but pays not a serious mind to any one of them.’
‘But why would he do such a thing?’ Antonia asked, not even attempting to hide her surprise. ‘Lady Clara has need of a mother—and Carlyle an heir. Surely he wishes to marry again. In fact, did I not hear that he was enamoured of the Lady Helen Cartland?’
‘He might be, but not as enamoured as he is reputed to be of…pretty ballet dancers and actresses,’ Catherine said, blushing hotly.
Antonia gasped. ‘Actresses and ballet dancers! Goodness, Kitty, wherever did you hear such a thing?’
‘From Lady Dalrymple, of course. I overheard her telling Mama that, on her last visit to London, she chanced to see Lord Carlyle going into Covent Garden. He was escorting an exceedingly handsome young woman, but one whose manner of dress and comportment led Lady Dalrymple to believe that she was not a member of respectable Society.’
‘Lady Dalrymple? That old tattlemonger!’ Antonia snapped. ‘I sometimes wonder whether she does not…make up all of her outrageous stories simply in an attempt to draw attention to herself.’
‘I am quite sure that she does, Toni, but not this time I fear. The very next day, Lady Brocklehurst—who, as you