fund that you’ve never used and a rainy-day savings account that has enough in it to keep you safe through the next biblical flood.”
“You’re right, you’re right.” Nodding, Andi took a few deep breaths and told herself to calm down. “It’s just, I haven’t been unemployed since I was sixteen.”
The reality of the situation was hitting home and it came like a fist to the solar plexus. If this kept up, she might faint and wouldn’t that be embarrassing, having Mac come out to the parking lot and find her stretched out across her car seats?
She’d quit her job.
What would she do every day? How would she live? Sure, she’d had a few ideas over the past few months about what she might want to do, but none of it was carved in stone. She hadn’t looked into the logistics of anything, she hadn’t made even the first list of what she’d need do before moving on one of her ideas, so it was all too nebulous to even think about.
She had time. Plenty of time to consider her future, to look at her ideas objectively. She would need plans. Purpose. Goals. But she wasn’t going to have those right away, so it was time to take a breath. No point in making herself totally insane. Jolene was right. Andi had a big savings account—Mac was a generous employer if nothing else—and it wasn’t as if she’d had time to spend that generous salary. Now she did.
“This is so great, Andi.”
“Easy for you to say.”
Jolene laughed again, then shouted, “Jilly, don’t push your sister into the pool.”
Anyone else hearing that would immediately think built-in, very deep pool. In reality, Andi knew the kids were jumping in and out of a two-foot-deep wading pool. Shallow enough to be safe and wet enough to give relief from the early Texas heat.
“Jacob’s game still at five today?” Andi asked abruptly.
“Sure. You’re coming?”
Of course she was going to the game. She’d quit her job so she’d be able to see her family. She smiled at her reflection as she imagined the look on Jacob’s little face when she showed up at the town baseball field. “You couldn’t keep me away.”
“Look at that—only been unemployed like a second and already you’re getting a life.”
Andi rolled her eyes. Jolene had been on her to quit for the past few years, insisting that standing still meant stagnating. As it turned out, she had a point. Andi had given Mac all she could give. If she stayed, she’d only end up resenting him and infuriated with herself. So it was no doubt past time to go. Move on.
And on her first official day of freedom, she was going to the Royal Little League field to watch her nephew’s game. “I’m just going home to change and I’ll meet you at the field in an hour or so.”
“We’ll be there. Jacob will be so excited. And after the game, you’ll come back here. Tom will grill us all some steaks to go with the bottle of champagne I’m making a point of picking up. You can drink my share.”
Andi forced a smile into her voice. “Champagne and steaks. Sounds like a plan.”
But after she hung up with her sister, Andi had to ask herself why, instead of celebrating, she felt more like going home for a good cry.
Andi went to the baseball game. Jolene had been right: eight-year-old Jacob was thrilled that his aunt was there, cheering for him alongside his parents. Of course, six-year-old Jilly and three-year-old Jenna were delighted to share their bag of gummy bears with Andi, and made plans for a tea party later in the week.
It had felt odd to be there, in the bleachers with family and friends, when normally she would have been at work. But it was good, too, she kept telling herself.
After the game, she had dinner with her family and every time her mind drifted to thoughts of Mac, Andi forced it away again. Instead, she focused on the kids, her sister and the booming laugh of her brother-in-law as he flipped steaks on a smoking grill.
By the following morning, she told herself that if she’d stayed with Mac and kept the job that had consumed her life, she wouldn’t have had that lazy, easy afternoon and evening. But still she had doubts. Even though she’d enjoyed herself, the whole thing had been so far out of her comfort zone, Andi knew she’d have to do some fine-tuning of her relaxation skills. But at least now she had the time to try.
Sitting on her front porch swing, cradling a cup of coffee in her hands, Andi looked up at the early-morning sky and saw her own nebulous future staring back at her. Normally by this time she was already at the office, brewing the first of many pots of coffee, going over her and Mac’s calendars and setting up conference calls and meetings. There would already be the kind of tension she used to live for as she worked to keep one step ahead of everything.
Now? She took another sip of coffee and sighed. The quiet crowded in on her until it felt as though she could hear her own heartbeat in the silence. Relaxation turned to tension in a finger snap. She was unemployed and, for the first time since she was a kid, had nowhere in particular to be.
It was both liberating and a little terrifying. She was a woman who thrived on schedules, preferred order and generally needed a plan for anything she was going to do. Even as a kid, she’d had her closet tidy, her homework done early and her bookcases in her room alphabetized for easy reference.
While Jolene’s bedroom had been chaotic, Andi’s was an island of peace and calm. A place for everything, everything in its place. Some might call that compulsive. She called it organized. And maybe that was just what she needed to do now. Organize her new world. Channel energies she would normally be using for Mac and his business into her own life. She was smart, capable and tenacious. There was nothing she couldn’t do.
“So.” After that inner pep talk, she drew her feet up under her on the thick, deep blue cushion. “I’ll make a plan. Starting,” she said, needing the sound of her own voice in the otherwise still air, “with finally getting my house in shape.”
She’d bought the run-down farmhouse a year ago and hadn’t even had the time to unpack most of the boxes stacked in the second bedroom. The walls hadn’t been painted, there were no pictures hung, no rugs scattered across the worn, scarred floor. It pretty much looked as lonely and abandoned as it had when she first bought it. And wasn’t that all kinds of sad and depressing?
Until a year ago, Andi had lived in a tiny condo that was, in its own way, as impersonal and unfinished as this house. She’d rented it furnished and had never had the time—or the inclination—to put her own stamp on the place. Working for Mac had meant that she was on duty practically twenty-four hours a day. So when was she supposed to be able to carve out time for herself? But in spite of everything, Andi had wanted a home of her own. And in the back of her mind, maybe she’d been planning even then on leaving McCallum Enterprises.
Leaving Mac.
It was the only explanation for her buying a house that she had known going in would need a lot of renovation. Sure, she could have hired a crew to come in and fix it all up. And she had had a new roof put on, the plumbing upgraded and the electrical brought up to code. But there were still the yards to take care of, the floors to be sanded, the walls to be painted and furniture to be bought.
“And that starts today,” she said, pushing off the swing. With one more look around the wide front yard, she turned and opened the screen door, smiling as it screeched in protest. Inside, she took another long glance at her home before heading into the kitchen to do what she did best. Make a list.
She knew where she’d start. The walls should be painted before she brought in sanders for the floors, and they’d probably need a couple of coats of paint to cover the shadow images of long-missing paintings.
In the kitchen she sat at a tiny table and started making notes. She’d go at her home exactly as she would have a new project