I’m in the middle of a fatal-force investigation. I cannot be involved in blowing anything up. This is a consult. Remember?”
“Back to the investigation again. Why are you so worried? Did you screw up?”
“No. I—well, I don’t think so. Maybe.”
“You can tell me, Sophia.”
She lowered her head, staring at nothing that he could see.
“I’m a former US Marine. I’ve shot people before.”
“That’s different.” She waved a dismissive hand. Then squared her shoulders and drew a breath. She was going to tell him and the realization filled her with both hope and terror.
“Do you know that there is not one person in my office that has even discharged their weapon, let alone been engaged in a significant-use-of-force incident? Well, Mel drew on a pit bull but he didn’t shoot because he got over a fence in time.”
“It happens to a lot of us,” he said again. “And if you can’t sleep or think or eat, that’s all just part of it. The crappy part, but it’s necessary. Eventually, you live with it. Mostly the memories stay down.”
He sat beside her overlooking the river as the clouds changed colors before her eyes. Clouds, she thought. That meant more rains would be coming.
“I shot a young Hispanic male,” she said.
He nodded. Saying nothing but somehow his silence encouraged her to continue.
“Here’s what happened. I’m going to say it fast so I don’t have to think about it all night.” She drew a breath as if preparing to submerge in deep water, then let it out. “Okay, I was off-duty and in my new car. I had just leased a BMW, black, Two Series. I mean I just left the dealership and I got bumped. I considered that it was a scam and so I had my weapon out when I left the vehicle. The male driver told me to step away from my BMW. Actually he said, ‘Give me the keys.’ And then he called me a...well, it doesn’t matter. He demanded the keys and reached for something in his coat. I saw the handgun before I fired. He died at the scene.”
Jack scratched his chin, feeling the stubble growing there. Seemed like a home run to him. She’d defended herself and from her version he saw no reason for her to worry.
“Seems justified.”
“But it wasn’t a handgun. It was a phone. He did have an unregistered handgun on his person. But that was not what he pointed at me. And he kept the phone pointed at me, even when he went to his knees.”
“You think he meant to photograph the damage?”
“I’ll never know.”
“Sophia, he told you to give him your keys. There is only one reason to hit a new Beamer and then demand the keys. He was boosting your car.”
“Probably.”
Jack’s anger took him totally by surprise. He tried to understand why he was so furious at this unknown perp. And then it struck him. He’d be murderous with anyone who threatened her. How had she gotten under his skin so fast?
She could have died and he would never have had a chance to know her. He wanted that chance. Trouble was, she didn’t. She had made it very clear that she could not wait to be out of here and back on the job.
“Does he have a criminal record or history of stealing cars?”
“I don’t know. They won’t tell me anything, and I don’t have access to the system. I do know his name. Nothing else yet. I’ve made my formal statement. I met with the union rep and our attorney. They gave me the protocol.”
“Referral to mental-health professional?”
“Sure. And contact with an agent who also had a deadly force encounter in Phoenix. But he was on a raid of a grow house and everyone inside was dirty and heavily armed. Not the same.”
A grow house was a home, usually abandoned, taken over and converted to an indoor greenhouse to grow marijuana. The drug producers were often well armed and prepared to defend their crop.
He said nothing. No one’s life experiences were the same, but all could be used to help every person find their path.
The silence stretched as the first star, Venus, appeared in the western sky.
“They’ve been investigating since Sunday. SAC said he’d keep me updated. He really hasn’t.”
“SAC?”
“Special agent in charge. He’s my liaison to the thirteen-member SIRG. That’s ‘shooting incident review group.’”
“Really?” Thirteen seemed like overkill. But this was the FBI. He knew that their investigation would be exhaustive and in-house.
“I haven’t heard anything since Thursday, when he told me the autopsy had been completed and that I should get my personal weapon back next week.”
“Any results from the autopsy?”
“He’s still dead.”
Jack almost laughed, but reined it in. She looked so grim.
“So what’s next?”
“Interviews with the two witnesses. Photographs. Diagrams and the report by the administrative director of the office of inspections.”
“That’s a real thing?”
She cast him a scowl. “Of course. He’s chairman of SIRG.”
“Supervising the cast of thirteen.”
“Twelve, minus himself.”
“I can see why you’re nervous.”
“No. You can’t. Your shooter had fired at you. My shooter was pointing a camera. One of the witnesses also had a phone and may have taken a photograph or video.”
“More evidence.”
“Yes.”
“You feel you made a mistake?”
“No. But what matters is what SIRG thinks. If they rule my actions unjustified, I could lose my job. Everything.”
There was a definite note of panic in her voice.
“All the schooling, training, work...gone.” She snapped her fingers. “Like that. And I’m not going back...” Her words trailed off.
Back where? To her reservation? He cast her a questioning look, but Sophia had clamped her mouth shut and laced her fingers so tightly in her lap her fingernails were going blue.
Jack offered her the only thing he could think of. “You have his name. I can run him through our system.”
Her eyes shifted to him.
“You’d do that?”
Jack didn’t say so aloud, but he’d do a lot more than that for her because despite knowing that she could not wait to put him and his tribe in her rearview mirror, he was desperately attracted to her.
“I would.”
She wrapped her arms around her knees and rocked back and forth. He lay a hand on her shoulder and she stilled and glanced up at him.
“Thank you.” She placed a hand over his. It wasn’t until her hand slid away that he could breathe again.
“Yeah. Don’t mention it. Name?”
“Martin Nequam.”
Jack asked for the spelling and she provided it.
The light had changed again, casting the sky in bright fuchsia and red. He glanced away from her, taking in their surroundings.
“It gets pretty dark up here at night,” he said. “And the road can be tricky. We’d best head down.