was part athletic, part merit.”
Nathan arched a brow at Leo, who was on academic probation at Humboldt State University. Leo had maintained a 3.0 GPA in high school without exerting much effort, so Nathan knew he could do better.
“You don’t pay my tuition,” Leo said, defensive.
That was true. Ray and Lydia were funding Leo’s studies. “I’m impressed by the achievement, not the cost savings.”
Abby touched Nathan’s elbow. It was the same gesture she’d used to keep Brooke quiet. “Do you play any sports?” she asked Leo.
“He surfs,” Brooke said.
This was news to Nathan. “Really?”
“We stopped by Mavericks after Christmas,” Brooke said.
Nathan felt the blood drain from his face. He’d never been to Mavericks Beach, but he’d heard the waves were huge. Not for amateurs.
Abby let go of his elbow. “You didn’t.”
“We did,” Brooke said, smiling. “Leo gave me a ride to Berkeley, and I wanted to check out the waves. I stayed on the beach while he went surfing.”
When Nathan pictured Leo paddling out into a raging sea, pressure built in his chest. “Why would you take such a stupid risk? What if you’d gotten held under, and Brooke drowned trying to save you?”
“She wouldn’t have come in after me,” Leo said, rolling his eyes. “The waves were only ten or fifteen feet high that day, and there were other surfers in the water. It wasn’t that dangerous. I didn’t even catch anything.”
Nathan wiped his hand over his mouth. Sometimes he could still taste the cool bite of a gin and tonic. He recognized cravings for what they were now. He was better at identifying stress and other triggers.
His emotions always ran high with Leo. There was no one he cared about more, no one who could make him as scared or angry. Nathan had to learn how to communicate with his son, and he was terrified of failing.
He took a deep breath, thinking back. His interactions with Brooke had been effortless. Why couldn’t he talk to Leo that way?
“I can’t wait to go swimming,” Brooke said. “I’m melting in this heat.”
Nathan used the hem of his shirt to blot his face. It was too hot to yell at Leo. He didn’t like feeling this way, tense and unhappy, but he couldn’t flip a switch to change the past. He couldn’t make his son love him again.
They hiked the short distance from the top of the mountain to the shore. The lake was even more beautiful up close, crystal blue and fresh-looking. The entire area had been carved by glaciers, which had left giant pools in the granite. There was a sandy beach on one side near an island of towering boulders.
“I bet I can climb those rocks and dive off,” Brooke said, shrugging out of her backpack and placing it on the sand.
“Don’t you dare,” Abby said.
“The water’s really deep, Mom.”
“We should test it first,” Leo said. “Depth can be deceiving.”
Brooke listened to Leo, rather than her mother. “Okay.”
The four of them sat down to unlace their hiking boots. Brooke tugged off her shorts and tank top, revealing a striped bikini. “Hurry up,” she said to Leo, who seemed to have forgotten what he was doing.
Leo fumbled to remove his high-tops and lame T-shirt.
Nathan resisted the urge to glance at Abby as she undressed. It would be rude to stare, hoping for a wardrobe malfunction. He imagined her breasts jiggling as she pulled her shirt over her head. Not looking also seemed weird—he wasn’t a horny teenager, incapable of acting cool. So he waited until he thought it was safe and...
Gulp.
Her suit wasn’t as skimpy at Brooke’s, but her body made it sexier. Or maybe he just didn’t see Brooke the same way because of her age and relationship to Leo. Abby was a mature woman, fair game for ogling. Her simple blue bikini accentuated her figure. She had pale skin and mouthwatering curves.
“Ever heard of manscaping?” Leo asked.
The question interrupted Nathan’s perusal. It took him a second to realize Leo was referring to the hair on his chest, which narrowed to a strip over his abdomen. Nathan had never heard any complaints from women about it. He glanced at Leo, noting that he had the smooth, sculpted torso of a male model. “You wax your chest?”
“No. I don’t have to.”
“But you’re saying I should?”
“Totally. Body hair is disgusting.”
“My mom likes it,” Brooke said.
Abby jerked her gaze from Nathan’s stomach. “Brooke!”
“What? You do.” She waded into the lake. “I think it’s kind of sexy, too. On guys.” Smiling at Leo, she dived into the water and swam away.
Nathan figured Brooke was being outrageous to tease Leo, who frowned at her retreating form. Abby escaped the awkward situation by submerging herself in the lake. It was cold, judging by her little shriek.
Nathan didn’t know what to say to his son, as usual. Although Brooke’s provocative comment had put him in his place, Nathan couldn’t just let it go. Leo had been combative and disrespectful too often. His bad attitude sparked an equally negative reaction in Nathan, prompting him to needle Leo further. Hooking his arm around Leo’s neck, he said, “Just keep shaving your balls, pretty boy. They’ll drop soon enough.”
Leo shoved him backward. “Fuck off!”
Nathan stumbled into the shallow water, his heart pounding. He wanted to duke this out, physically and emotionally. Wrestling wasn’t a good way to communicate, but it felt better than doing nothing. So he threw his arms around Leo in a maneuver that was half tackle, half hug. Leo rewarded him with another hard push. Then they were both in the lake, splashing and grappling. The cold shock invigorated him.
Nathan tried to gain the upper hand, but Leo was a slippery sucker. His son elbowed him in the stomach and kicked him in the thigh. Nathan grunted in pain, scrambling for a better hold. His foot scraped against a sharp rock as they waded into deeper water. Leo broke free and retaliated with a swift punch in the mouth.
Nathan’s head rocked to the side. He fell into the waist-high water and let himself sink. The urge to fight left his body. It was a well-placed hit, but probably not full strength, and nowhere near a knockout.
Good one.
Nathan didn’t plan to stay under for more than a few seconds. He just wanted to avoid a second blow. To his astonishment, Leo came after him. He put his arms around Nathan and hauled him upright.
“Dad!”
Nathan found his footing and turned to gape at Leo, who’d clearly been worried. About him. His throat got tight and tears flooded his eyes. Nathan swiped a hand down his face, laughing suddenly.
“You were faking,” Leo accused.
“No,” he said, tasting blood. “You laid me flat.”
“What the fuck is so funny?”
“You thought I was drowning.”
Nathan didn’t know why that was funny, but it was. Maybe because he’d been horrified by the thought of Leo drowning at Mavericks. Maybe because they were both fools, and it felt good to act stupid with his son.
“You’re an asshole,” Leo said, but he was smiling.
Still chuckling, Nathan swam into the deeper water. Leo followed, dunking him for good measure. Nathan returned the favor. He knew the issues between them couldn’t be solved by an afternoon of horseplay. But