colors were soothing, the furniture comfortable. The reason the awkward hours were etched into her brain had nothing to do with the house itself and everything to do with Paula.
“This way,” Paula said. “You know, it’s funny. I made cookies this morning. I don’t usually make cookies, but suddenly I got in the mood.” She smiled at Gabe again, looking stunned but pleased. “Do you like chocolate chip?”
He nodded in appreciation. “They’re my favorite.”
“Mine, too, although I really like peanut butter, too.”
“Those are my favorite, too,” Gabe told her, as charming as ever. “You’re pretty. Isn’t my grandma pretty, Mommy?”
Jesse nodded.
Paula looked as if she couldn’t believe this was happening. “Can I hug you?” she asked him.
Gabe smiled and held out his arms. Paula dropped to her knees and held him close. Her eyes closed as her face took on an expression of such longing that Jesse had to look away. Wasn’t this always the way? The two people who were more likely to welcome her had been cautious and unfriendly. The one person who had always hated her seemed thrilled she was back in town. Life was nothing if not perverse.
Fifteen minutes later, Gabe had eaten a cookie and finished a small glass of milk. He’d also brought Paula up to date on their trip from Spokane and how he was going to meet his daddy soon.
“Matt hasn’t seen him yet?” Paula asked.
Jesse shook her head, then looked into the family room. “Gabe, would you like to watch TV for a little bit?”
It was a rare daytime treat. Her son jumped to his feet and followed her to the sofa. Paula found a channel for kids, then the two women retreated to the kitchen where they could keep an eye on Gabe without being overheard.
“I didn’t know,” Paula said as soon as they were seated. She leaned toward Jesse and touched her hand. “I swear, I didn’t know you were pregnant. All I knew was what your sister said.” She shifted uncomfortably. “I told Matt about that.”
“I know. It’s okay. There were complications.” Jesse hated how, after all this time, the past still had the power to hurt everyone involved.
“It was a long time ago,” Jesse told her. “Whatever you believe, you have to know I loved Matt. I would never have hurt him.”
“I do believe you,” Paula said, surprising her. “He was devastated after you left.”
“Was he?” It was nice to know he’d missed her, however briefly. “I told him I was pregnant, but he didn’t think he was the father. I told him there hadn’t been anyone else, but he didn’t believe me.”
Once again Paula looked uncomfortable. “It’s my fault. All of it. He was angry because of what I said. I’d held him too close for too long. I was one of those horrible, clinging mothers they’re always discussing on talk shows. He was angry with you, but he never forgave me. We stopped being close after you left. We’re still not close. I rarely see him.”
“I’m sorry,” Jesse said, and found she meant it. “You’re his mother. Nothing will ever change that.”
“Something he’s managed to ignore,” she said with a lightness that seemed forced. “So tell me. What have you been doing with yourself?”
“I’ve been living in Spokane. That’s where I went when I took off. At least that’s where the money ran out. I got a job in a bar. I was lucky. Bill, the guy who owns the place, took care of me. Found me a place to live, worked my schedule around Gabe.” She smiled as she thought of her boss and friend. “He’s the one who gave me the kick in the ass to come back here. Well, him and Gabe. Your grandson wants to meet his daddy. I couldn’t keep saying no.”
“Are you and Bill—” Paula’s voice trailed off.
Jesse stared at her. “Are we …” she got the question “… involved? Oh, no. We’re just friends. He says I’m too young for him.” She smiled. “He’s in his sixties, as are all his friends. They’ve been my family while I was gone. It was just so hard being away. It’s only a few hundred miles, but I felt like I was in another world. I couldn’t believe Nicole just let me go.”
Jesse held the coffee mug Paula had given her but didn’t drink. “It was always just Nicole and me. She was my bossy older sister. Claire, her twin, had gone away the year I was born, so I never knew her beyond the little Nicole told me or what I read in magazines.”
“She plays piano?”
“Yes. She’s pretty famous but I don’t really know her beyond some e-mails and letters. She’s been in touch with me over the years. She’s the one who told me about Nicole getting married and all that.” Jesse tried to keep the pain out of her voice. Despite everything that had happened between them, she loved Nicole and had hated being cut off from her. Nicole’s life had gone on, as if she, Jesse, had never been a part of things.
“How long are you back here?” Paula asked.
“I don’t know. A few weeks. I’m half owner of the Keyes Bakery, but I’m not asking Nicole for anything. I’m going to work there and give her my brownie recipe. I’ve been working on it for months. It’s finally perfect and—”
Jesse pressed her lips together. “I’m sorry. I’m going on and on about my life when what you really want to hear about is Gabe. I just haven’t had anyone to talk to in a long time.”
“Me, either,” Paula told her. “Where are you staying?”
“In a motel. I’m going to rent some place furnished in the University District. It will be cheap in the summer.”
“That will make for a lot of driving,” Paula said. “You could just stay here. With me.”
Jesse didn’t know what to say. Talk about an unexpected invitation. “Are you sure?”
“Come see the rooms, then decide.”
Stunned, Jesse followed her upstairs. Two bedrooms sat at one end of the hallway, a shared bathroom between them. Both were set up for guests, with double beds and bright colors. The rooms were lovely, well lit and clean, so different from the seedy place she would have to rent, that she felt herself getting emotional.
“Paula, this is beyond generous,” she murmured.
“They’re both yours for as long as you want,” Matt’s mother said. “I’ve missed four years of my grandson’s life because I was a scared, lonely woman terrified of losing the little she had. Well, I did lose it and I’ve been regretting that more than I can say. Stay here. Please. Let me have the chance to get to know you and Gabe. Let me make up for how horrible I was five years ago. You didn’t deserve that, Jesse. This is the least I can do.”
Actually, it was an irresistible offer, Jesse thought, looking at the rooms. One she wasn’t about to refuse.
“Thank you,” she said, feeling safe and welcome for the first time since arriving in Seattle. “You’re being more than kind. Gabe and I would love to stay.”
“Good. Why don’t you head back to your hotel and pack while I go to the grocery and stock up. Oh, you’ll have to tell me what you both like to eat. I’ve missed cooking for more than myself.”
A beautiful place to stay and someone to do the cooking? It was a little corner of heaven, Jesse thought. And Paula was the most unlikely angel.
CHAPTER FOUR
MATT STOOD IN FRONT OF the large window as he spoke. He was still angry; he could feel the rage burning inside, although he did his best to keep his voice controlled. Not that his attorney was fooled.
“This isn’t the time to make decisions,” Heath told him. “Wait a few days, a couple of weeks. Nothing is going