waitress left and Ryan asked, “No onions?”
“They don’t agree with me.”
“That’s typical. I know a mother who said she couldn’t cook bacon the entire first three months of her pregnancy.”
“Smells used to bother me but that has become better.”
Ryan crossed his arms and leaned on the table. “So do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?”
“I don’t know.”
“Really?”
Phoebe almost laughed at his look of shock. “Don’t want to know. I like surprises.”
“That’s pretty amazing in this day and age where everyone is wanting to know the sex and you don’t. I wouldn’t want to know, either. One of my favorite moments during a delivery is the look on the parents’ faces when they discover the sex.”
Phoebe got the impression that she’d gone up a notch in his estimation.
“You know, I don’t know any other male midwife.”
“There are only a few of us around. More in Australia than in the US.”
“So why did you become one?”
“I wanted to do something that made me smile.” He picked up his drink. “I was tired of watching people’s lives being destroyed or lost when I was in the service. I wanted to do something that involved medicine but had a happy ending. What’s better than bringing a life into the world?”
He was right. What was better than that?
The waitress brought their meals. They didn’t speak for a while.
It fascinated Phoebe that they were virtual strangers but seem to be content sharing a meal together. This evening stood in sharp contrast to when they had met. Being around this Ryan put her at ease for some reason. After their first meeting she would have sworn that couldn’t be possible.
She ate half her burger and chips before pushing them aside.
“You’re eating for two, you know,” Ryan said with a raised brow.
“The problem is that when this baby comes I don’t want to look like I ate for three.” She wiped her mouth with her napkin and placed it on the table.
“How’s your weight gain?”
Phoebe leaned back in her chair. “That’s certainly a personal question.”
“I’m a midwife. I ask that question all the time.”
“Yes, but you aren’t my midwife.”
He pushed his empty plate away. “I’ll concede that. But I’m only asking out of concern.”
“If it’ll make you feel better my weight is just fine. I’m within the guidelines.”
“Good. You look like you’re taking care of yourself.”
“I try to eat right and get some exercise every day.” She looked pointedly at her plate. “Not that this burger was on the healthy chart.”
He shrugged. “No, it probably isn’t, but every once in a while it’s okay.”
They lapsed into silence again as the waitress refilled their glasses and took away their plates.
A few minutes later Phoebe said, “I know this might be tough but I was wondering if you might be willing to tell me some stories about Joshua. Something I could tell the baby. Something about him outside of just what I remember.”
Ryan’s lips tightened and he didn’t meet her gaze.
“You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
After a moment he met her look. “What would you like to know?”
“I guess anything. I feel like you knew him better than me. You spent far more time together than we did. I was wondering how you met?”
Ryan’s gray eyes took on a faraway look. “The Aussie and the US troops didn’t always hit it off, but JT and I did. We didn’t usually work together, but I was asked to go out on patrol with his platoon. Their medic was on leave and the replacement hadn’t made it in yet. My commander agreed. It was supposed to be an easy in and out of a village under our control. All went well until we were headed out, then all hell broke loose. The Iraqis had us pinned down and we couldn’t expect help until the next morning.
“A couple of JT’s men were seriously injured. While we spent long hours hunkered down together we got to know each other pretty well. He told me about you, and I told him about growing up in Texas.
“When I told him that I was tired of having to patch up people that another human had destroyed, he encouraged me to do something different. Even suggested I move to Australia for a new start. He joked that if he ever left the army he’d use his skills to become a police officer.”
Phoebe had never heard Joshua say anything about wanting to do that. He had told Ryan things he either hadn’t wanted to share with her or couldn’t. It made her sad and angry at the same time. She and Joshua had just not been as close as a married couple should have been.
“After that kind of night you know each other pretty well. We started getting together for drinks whenever we had leave at the same time.” His eyes didn’t meet hers. “JT found out that I didn’t get much mail so he shared his letters with me.”
For seconds Phoebe panicked, trying to remember what she had said in her letters. Misery overtook the panic. During the last few years of their marriage her letters had been less about them personally and more about what was happening with her students, how Melbourne was changing, what she was doing at the house. It had been as if she’d been writing to a friend instead of her husband.
“I always looked forward to your letters. They were full of news and I liked to hear about your class. The letters your students wrote were the best. There was something about them that helped make all the ugliness disappear for a while.”
“I’m glad they helped. My students liked writing them. Thank you for telling me about Joshua. I guess I just wanted to talk about him. This is his baby and he isn’t around. Just hearing about him makes him seem a little closer. But it’s time for me to go.” She needed to think about what Ryan had told her. The fact that someone had known her husband better than she had made her feel heartsick.
Ryan stood and Phoebe did also. She led the way to the door. Outside Ryan turned in the direction of the hospital.
“I need to go this way to catch the tram. Thanks for dinner.” She turned toward the left.
“I’ll give you a ride home,” Ryan said.
“I don’t want you to drive all the way out to my house.”
“I don’t mind and you don’t need to be so late getting home. Don’t you own a car?”
“No, I can take the tram to almost anything I need.”
“But you’re making two-hour round trips to see Sophia. In America we can’t live without a car. There isn’t public transportation everywhere.”
“Yes, but that’s only once a month and it’s worth it to have Sophia as my midwife. I wish she was going to be there for the delivery.”
“I realize that I live in Australia, but I can’t get used to prenatal care being called antenatal. It took me forever to tell the mothers I saw that they needed to come to the antenatal clinic. I just think prenatal.”
“The ideas and ways we grow up with are hard to change.”
“Yes, once an idea gets fixed in my head it’s hard to make me budge. And with that thought, not to make you feel bad, but you look like you could use some rest. I’m driving you home.”
“I am