was all from the safety of her own home and she could block him at any point it felt like he was getting serious or turned out to be a crazed lunatic.
‘What if it’s fate?’ Sophie went all gushy.
‘You think C is short for Charming, as in Prince Charming?’
‘You never know. Stranger things have happened. You read about things like this all the time in magazines. People who meet the love of their life in the frozen fish section of the supermarket or get run over by them.’
‘Really?’ Anna was pulling a disbelieving face. She wouldn’t be keen to marry someone who had attempted to run her over, even if it was accidental.
‘Oh, yeah. It’s quite common,’ said Sophie, taking a chunk out of her sandwich. Anna doubted that was true. ‘What if he’s this gorgeous millionaire who wants to whisk you away on his private jet to his castle?’
‘Then I’m wondering what he’s doing cleaning his mate’s patio.’
Sophie openly huffed and handed Anna her phone back. ‘True. Shame. It would be nice to have someone take you away from all this.’ She gestured randomly.
‘How’re things with Dave?’
‘He’s still Dave.’ She said it like she was apologising. ‘He thinks he’s dying because he’s got a cold at the moment. Last night it was like trying to sleep next to someone experimenting with a chemistry set. And he managed to sleep through Petal having two night terrors and Arlo coming into our bedroom at four to ask how many sleeps until Santa comes. Then he woke me switching on the bathroom light too loud this morning.’
‘How do you switch a light on too loud?’
‘I don’t know, but he does it all the time. Then he’s in there for ages and afterwards it’s like sleeping in a public toilet.’
They both pulled faces as if they could smell something unpleasant. ‘Not nice,’ said Anna, who had long wanted an en suite but was filing this for future reference.
‘He said he’d book the train tickets for our trip to London on Saturday but he forgot. He promised to start sorting the garden out. But apparently some new shooty killy game came out, which has kept him busy. Still, I’m looking forward to getting away for a couple of days on the team jolly. Dave won’t know what’s hit him.’ Sophie seemed to perk up.
‘Don’t get too excited. There wasn’t much available at such short notice. I’ve found a farm who have converted a barn into hostel-style accommodation and they teach dry-stone walling but I think we can make the best of it.’
‘Sounds like fun.’
Anna felt they would have to add quite a bit of alcohol to get it to that level but she was willing to give it a go, though she was more concerned about the motivations of senior management in sending them all off on something like this – now Hudson had sown that particular seed.
‘I hope I can cope with being in a confined space with Hudson,’ said Sophie, looking both worried and dreamy-eyed.
‘You still having improper thoughts?’ Anna tried hard to hide a smirk. It was funny to think of her having a crush on someone at her age.
‘Stop it.’ Sophie gave her a playful swipe. ‘All the time. If anything it’s getting worse. I can barely take in what he’s saying because I’m concentrating hard not to grab him and snog his face off.’
Anna’s expression conveyed her alarm. ‘Bloody hell. Really?’
‘Really,’ said Sophie, sounding miserable. ‘I wish I could stop it but I’ve tried and I can’t. I’ve tried imagining him sitting on the loo and kissing his partner … not at the same time … but even at the same time, nothing works. Whenever I’m near him there’s this electricity, this magnetic attraction. He helped me put my coat on the other day and I was actually aroused.’ Sophie was deadly serious.
‘You poor thing. Did you go home and shag Dave’s brains out?’
Sophie recoiled. ‘Goodness, no. Why would I do that?’
‘Because he’s your husband.’
‘But it’s not him who’s turning me on,’ she said and her face returned to its disappointed resting state.
Anna went off to visit Bert. She stopped at the paper shop on the way to pick up some toffees and a big Sunday paper; she wasn’t sure if he was a broadsheet kind of person but she didn’t want to look like a cheapskate.
‘Hello again,’ said the carer, coming through reception. ‘Bert’s in his room.’ She pointed back up the corridor.
Anna walked past the television room, past two closed doors with the number five and six on before coming to one with an open door. She gave a quick squiz round the door, unsure of what she’d find. Bert was sitting in an armchair staring out of the window.
‘Hello, Bert, I brought you a paper,’ said Anna, walking in and plonking the paper on his lap and herself on what she supposed was a footstool.
Bert glanced at Anna and then at the paper on his lap. ‘Didn’t think I’d see you again.’
‘I said I’d come back. And I got you these,’ she said, putting the toffees onto a small table in front of him. He squinted at them and then returned to looking out of the window.
‘How’s Maurice?’
‘He’s great,’ said Anna with gusto, ‘but he’s still missing you,’ she added hastily.
Bert’s shoulders jumped as he gave a short laugh. ‘I bet he’s forgotten me.’
‘I doubt it. Maurice forgets nothing. I gave him his food on a saucer because his two bowls were both in the dishwasher and now he expects every meal on a china saucer. You do something once and that’s it.’
Bert chuckled. ‘You’re right. If he likes something he expects it all the time. I once left a cardigan on the sofa and that was his bed for weeks.’
Anna got out her phone. ‘I’ve got some more photos of him,’ she said, flicking to the right pictures and handing the phone to Bert. He returned to looking out of the window. ‘It’s all right, I’ll remember him how he was.’ Anna switched off her phone and put it back in her pocket.
‘Has he brought you any presents yet?’ asked Bert. There was a twinkle in his eye.
‘No. He’s not a bird catcher is he?’ Anna was enjoying watching the birds flitting in and out of the park while she had her morning coffee; she didn’t like the thought of having to deal with any in kit form.
‘No, he doesn’t catch birds. He brings in other things. The occasional mouse.’ Bert looked off into the distance again and Anna checked her watch; it was too soon to leave without seeming rude. She surveyed the room. It was nice enough but there didn’t appear to be anything personal in it. The picture she had given him of Maurice was propped up on his bedside cabinet next to a black and white wedding photo. ‘Is that you?’ she asked, nodding at the photo.
‘Is what me?’
Anna got up to have a closer look. ‘This photo of a strapping young groom and his beautiful bride.’ She studied the two beaming faces staring back at her. From the style of clothes they were wearing she guessed it was probably the Sixties.
‘Me and my Barbara. Tenth of July nineteen fifty-nine.’
‘She’s beautiful, Bert.’
Bert sniffed. ‘She was that. No one like her.’
‘Can I ask what happened?’ asked Anna, replacing the picture and sitting back on the stool.
‘Barbara died four years ago. We were doing the washing up and she said she had a headache. I teased her for trying to shirk doing the drying up – she hated doing the drying. She went for a lie-down.