Brenda Novak

This Heart of Mine


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noticed,” he responded, and hit the end button.

      * * *

      “What about this?”

      Riley grimaced at the blue dress Kyle had pulled off the rack. He was beginning to wonder what had possessed him to call his friend back and offer to go shopping with him. Just because Kyle had decided to play Santa in the middle of spring didn’t mean Riley had to get in on the act. “I don’t know. I don’t even know what I’m doing here,” he grumbled.

      “I do,” Kyle said. “Phoenix is your son’s mother. So there’s that. And you feel bad about letting her buy you breakfast this morning, knowing she’s got to be living on pennies.”

      “No, it’s your fault,” he said. “You dragged me into this.”

      “Dragged you? You’re the one who suggested we stop at the grocery store on the way over here and get some canned goods. Thanks to you, we spent nearly fifty bucks on soup and chili and crackers and shit, and walked out of there with almost two boxfuls.”

      The memory of Phoenix sitting at Just Like Mom’s in probably the only nice outfit she owned, counting out the money to cover his breakfast, made him squirm. But this wasn’t just about that. Spending a couple hundred bucks to help her get a start was the least he could do, especially if she was innocent. “Food makes sense. She probably needs that most of all.”

      The sales assistant approached, a woman by the name of Kirsten, according to her badge.

      “Clothes make sense, too,” Kyle said. “So...should we buy it?” He shook the dress to bring Riley’s attention back to it.

      “That’s part of our new spring line,” Kirsten volunteered. “The cap sleeves are darling. So is the print. And with the way cotton breathes, it’s perfect for the warmer months. Any woman would love it.”

      Riley figured she’d know better than they would. The girl he’d dated years ago would never wear something so feminine. But Phoenix was a woman now, and judging by what she’d had on at the restaurant this morning, her tastes had matured.

      Even if it wasn’t the perfect choice, he doubted she’d be too critical. No one could ever accuse her of being spoiled. “I guess it’s fine.” They’d already been shopping for two hours and had agonized over their other purchases just as much. Now the mall was about to close, and they still had a ninety-minute drive home. He was anxious to be done.

      With a sigh of relief, Kyle turned to the sales associate. “We’ll take it.”

      She was heading to the register when Riley stopped her. “Wait! I don’t think that one will fit.” They hadn’t even looked at the tag.

      “What size do you need?” she asked.

      “A small one,” he replied.

      “That doesn’t tell me a lot.” She chuckled. “How small?”

      “We bought something in a size three at the last place,” Kyle told her.

      Her heels clicked on the floor as she approached the rack where Kyle had found the dress. “I’m afraid this brand only comes in even numbers—zero, two, four. And I doubt we have a zero. We don’t get many of those. Is there someone you could call or text to ask?”

      Kyle took out his phone. “Maybe one of our female friends has seen Phoenix since she’s been home,” he said, but Riley stopped him before he could dial.

      “I doubt they have. And it doesn’t matter, anyway, because no one’s supposed to know about this, remember?”

      “We can trust Callie, Eve or Cheyenne!” Kyle said.

      “The fact that I’m pitching in on this is just between you and me,” Riley insisted.

      Kyle scowled. “If it’s not going to get back to Phoenix, what does it matter?”

      After everything he’d said through the years, it would seem like too much of a contradiction. And he didn’t want to deal with the questions his buying clothes for her would raise, or what the rest of the gang might surmise from his answers. “We agreed.”

      Kyle shoved his phone back in his pocket. “So...what do we do? Make another guess?”

      “That’s what we’ve done so far, isn’t it? You said yourself she can always return or exchange.” At least he’d known her shoe size...

      “If she can walk all the way to Sacramento,” he muttered. “I wasn’t really thinking of the logistics when I said that.”

      “With any luck, all the stuff will fit or she’ll figure out how to get back here and return the things that don’t.” Riley picked up the bags he’d put on the floor. “We’re just dropping this shit on her doorstep and leaving it at that.”

      Kirsten obviously didn’t overhear a conversation like this every day. “Who’s the lucky recipient?” she asked, her gaze darting between them.

      “An old acquaintance.” Riley had no intention of explaining more than that, even though he could tell she was curious.

      “Maybe someone could give her a ride if it doesn’t fit,” she said, as if she’d easily solved that problem.

      Riley ignored the comment. She couldn’t know that after spending nearly seventeen years in prison Phoenix had far fewer resources and friends than most people. “We’ll take a two or a four. Your choice.”

      “My choice?” she said in surprise.

      “If it helps, she’s small, maybe a hundred pounds, but she’s not flat or anything,” Kyle told her. “She’s got a really nice, um, figure.”

      “I see.” As Kirsten turned to sort through the rest of the dresses, Riley shot Kyle a dirty look.

      “What?” Kyle murmured.

       “She’s got a really nice figure?”

      He spread out his hands. “It’s the truth!”

      “A hundred pounds isn’t much,” Kirsten mused, concentrating hard enough that she seemed oblivious to what they were saying behind her. “I haven’t weighed that since I was twelve. So...I’m thinking a two.”

      “That’ll work,” Kyle said, but he would’ve responded the same way no matter what she recommended. They had no idea what they were doing.

      “Here we go.” A pleasant smile curved her lips. “Will there be anything else?”

      “We’d like one more outfit,” Riley said.

      “For the same woman?” she asked.

      “Yes.”

      She draped the dress over her arm. “Something similar to this or...?”

      “Maybe some shorts?”

      “Got it.”

      When she set off to fulfill Riley’s request, Kyle lowered his voice. “What about underwear?”

      “What about it?”

      “Don’t you think we should get her some?”

      “Hell, no!” He wasn’t about to look at lingerie with Phoenix in mind.

      At his unequivocal response, Kyle frowned. “Look, I’m not an only child, like you. I have a sister, so maybe I’m more comfortable with this. But a woman’s got to have underwear. And we passed a Victoria’s Secret store. I say we stop there on our way out, grab a handful of panties and a bra and be done with it.”

      Riley stretched his neck. To continue to refuse would only make him seem immature. Kyle was just being practical. But Riley had slept with Phoenix. Of course he’d conjure up images and memories best forgotten. He’d been with only one other girl