a ruin. The touch of her hand on his numb skin made him feel like the battle-scarred king of the keep who had married a princess.
She rolled to face him, her head resting on his damaged shoulder. ‘In the dark, when I am by your side, I have but to touch your scar and I will know who you are. I do not even have to open my eyes.’
Strange. ‘I am a fortunate man to have a woman love me for my imperfections and not in spite of them.’
His face clouded, for a moment. ‘Would you do the same for me, I wonder?’
He smiled back at her, kissing her hair. ‘We shall never know, dear. You are perfection. I shall not believe otherwise, no matter what you might say.’
She frowned, as though ready to correct him. So he kissed her once, softly. ‘Now, go back to sleep. No more bad dreams.’ He touched the tip of her nose with his fingertip.
‘Yes, William,’ she said with a happy sigh and curled up beside him again, closing her eyes.
Will rode out to meet his brother that morning, still full of the strangeness of his new life. The horse beneath him was the chestnut gelding. It was a better choice than his foolish attempt to ride Zeus. But while full of spirit, it simply was not Jupiter.
It still hurt to think that he had been the cause of the old horse’s death. His father had cautioned him, practically from the cradle, that the Bellston family was known for its hot blood and rash actions. He had taken the advice to heart and been cautious and circumspect in all things. Because of this, his life had been well ordered and scandal-free.
At some point in the last year, his training had failed him. He had lost an old friend and his memory as well. But he’d gained the most precious gift a man could earn: the love of a woman who he could love in return. There was probably something to be learned about the need for balance in all things and the danger of being too punctilious for one’s own good, but he could not quite grasp it.
He could remember the feelings of unease, before the christening. He’d had the nagging feeling that his formerly feckless brother was somehow leaving him behind and that his own youth was slipping away unspent. Since then, he had allowed himself to be driven by passion to foolishness.
Not that passion was such a bad thing, when in its rightful place. Most times, Justine was as moderate and sensible as the old William might have wished. But last night, she had proven to be as wild and tempestuous as an adventurous man might have longed for.
They had woken at the dawn and made love again. Her bad dream was forgotten. Each time he’d touched her, she’d laughed. It was a joyous, abandoned sound, as though she’d never laughed before in her life, keeping the happiness bottled inside her until he had come to release it. Her climaxes had been much the same, giddy with desire and overcome with love for him. Her eagerness to please was no longer mechanical and worrisome. It was just her half of a shared gift.
When they were finished, she had thrown herself back into the pillows again, pulling him with her to share kisses and drowse until it was time to rise. When he had left the room for breakfast, she was still there, the covers pulled over her face to reveal nothing but a tangle of red-gold hair. The thought made him smile in a satisfaction deeper than he could ever remember.
Adam cantered up to him on the path leading away from the house and noticed the change almost immediately. ‘Enjoying the summer weather, Will? Or is there some other reason for this total transformation in you?’
‘Transformation?’
‘Just now, you were grinning like an idiot.’
Will grinned all the harder in response. ‘It would be ungentlemanly to say more than that I am a happily married man.’
Adam raised his eyebrows. ‘You have rediscovered the reason for your sudden union?’
‘Some of it, at least.’ If he’d had even a taste of this before they’d married, the need for an immediate elopement was now clear to him. ‘Let us say, I am pleased to find her as devoted to me and my happiness as I am to her and hers.’
Adam laughed. ‘I would have said something similarly vague after only a short time with Penny. As I remember, you doubted our compatibility.’
‘I could not have been more wrong about that,’ Will admitted. ‘And I am pleased to admit that I have been wrong about Justine. I do not remember what first drew me to her. Perhaps I never will. But I no longer question the rightness of it.’ If that much was true, did he really need more? He pushed his previous thoughts aside. ‘I think I will not brood over-long about the absence of memory. The present is more than enough to keep me happy.’
‘And your wife is settling into her place in your home?’
‘She seems to be managing well,’ he said. Then added, ‘But it will be difficult to know for certain. She really is quite shy. I doubt she would complain if things were difficult.’ He thought of her fear in the night, and wondered if he should press her about it. She would deny all, he was sure, and smile until he was convinced that there was no reason to question her.
He gave his brother a worried look. ‘She is not likely to request help, even if she needs it. It is as if she does not think herself worthy.’
Adam frowned. ‘We noticed similar behaviour when she came to us. I think she is unaccustomed to having family on whom to rely. Perhaps her life was more difficult than she lets on. I am sure, in time, she will come to be more comfortable with you.’
‘I should certainly hope so.’ Will frowned as well. ‘But I should hate to think that I contributed to her isolation in any way. Her sister is some distance from here, boarding in a school in the south.
‘You are sending for her, I assume?’
‘Of course.’ He frowned. ‘But why did I part them at all? It was most unkind of me. Justine has no wedding ring on her finger. Did I not bother with that, either?’ Nor had he written his family to expect her. ‘What if I’d died from this injury, without making provision for her happiness?’
‘She arrived with your own ring, worn on a chain around her neck. She said that all was done in a hurry and you had promised to take care of it when you arrived home. In the meanwhile, she has been content to do without and never once complained of it. Do not be so hard on yourself,’ Adam finished, with a slight shake of the head. ‘A newly married man can be allowed a moment of selfish pleasure.’
So, it had been selfish of him. Even Adam had noticed. And it had been more than a moment. If he understood the situation, he had seduced her without promise of marriage, then kept their union a secret for some weeks. It sounded almost as if he was ashamed of his actions.
Things would change, from this moment on. ‘She is always doing without, even when there is no need of it. I will not allow that in the future. I will find some way to bring her out of herself. She is delightful company, when I can get her to speak.’
‘So I told you,’ Adam said, smiling. ‘And she does enjoy her morning stroll.’ He pointed ahead of them, on the path. The woman they had been discussing was walking through the wood, pale and quiet as a ghost. She had stopped at the darkest part of the little copse of trees, the dull gold of her gown and spencer blending with the dying leaves. Will had always felt there was a certain air of mystery about it. But today, it was as if they had interrupted a fairy in some mystic rite. ‘Justine!’ he called. ‘What are you doing here, darling?’
Her response to his voice was surprising. Rather than greeting him with pleasure, she started like a rabbit, turning this way and that, as though searching for concealment. Only when she realised the hopelessness of escape did she straighten her shoulders and turn to them. She smiled timidly, offering a curtsy. ‘Your Grace. My lor—’ She stopped herself in mid-word and said, ‘Will’, as though just remembering their relationship.
If