easy in the end,’ she told him. ‘I don’t understand why I didn’t think of it earlier. I didn’t mind being expelled in the least. It was boarding school—of course—the most elite girls’ school my father could find. But I wasn’t very...elite.’
She kicked her legs up and wiggled her bare toes in front of her and he could see how she might not be described as elite.
She wasn’t elite. She was fascinating.
‘I hated it,’ she told him bluntly. ‘I was there to be turned into a young lady. We had a whole afternoon every week of deportment, for heaven’s sake. We learned to climb in and out of a car so no one can catch a sight of knickers.’
‘Really?’
‘It sounds funny,’ she told him. ‘It wasn’t. I learned to wrangle a purse, a cocktail and an oyster at the same time, but it’s a skill that’s overrated.’
‘I guess it could be.’ She had him entranced. ‘So...’
‘So?’
‘Expulsion? Explain.’
‘Oh,’ she said and grinned. ‘That was our annual ball. Very posh. We invited the local Very Elite Boys’ School. Deportment classes gave way to dancing lessons and everyone had Very Expensive new frocks. And hairstyles. It was the culmination of the school year.’
‘So...’
‘So you might have noticed I’m little,’ she told him. ‘And...well endowed?’
‘I hadn’t,’ he told her and she choked.
‘Liar. I’m a size D cup and it’s the bane of my life. But my mother bought me a frock and she was so delighted by it I didn’t have the heart to tell her I hated it. It was crimson and it was low-cut, with an underwire that pushed everything up.’
He had the vision now. He blinked. ‘Wow.’
‘My mother’s willowy,’ she said, with just a trace of sympathy for a woman who’d never understood her daughter’s figure. ‘It would have looked elegant on Mum, but on me? It just made me look like a tart, and it got attention.’ She paused for breath. ‘Rodney Gareth was a horrid little toad, but sadly he was also the son of Malcolm Gareth QC, who’s a horrid big toad. Rodney asked me to dance. He held me so tight my boobs were crushed hard against him. He swaggered all over the dance floor with me and I could feel his...excitement. I could hear the other girls laughing. And then...’
She fell silent for a moment and he thought she was going to stop. ‘And then?’ It’d kill him if he didn’t get any further, he thought, but she relented.
‘We all had these dinky little dance programmes, with pencils attached,’ she said. ‘And, before I could stop him, he pulled mine from my wrist and held it up, pretending to check for my next free dance. And then he deliberately dropped the pencil down my cleavage.’
‘Uh oh,’ he said.
‘Uh oh is right,’ she said bitterly. ‘I was standing in the middle of the dance floor and suddenly he shoved his whole hand down there. And people started laughing...’
‘Oh, Penny.’
‘So I kneed him right where it hurt most,’ she said. ‘I used every bit of power I had. I still remember his scream. It was one of the more satisfying moments of my life but of course it didn’t last. I felt sick and cheap and stained. I walked out of the ball, back to my dorm, ripped my stupid dress off and called a cab to take me home. And don’t you dare laugh.’
‘I never would.’ He hesitated. ‘Penny... Did your parents laugh?’
‘They were appalled. Mum was horrified. She could see how upset I was. But Dad? The first thing he did was ring Rodney’s parents to find out if he was okay. His father told Dad they weren’t sure if I’d interfered with the Gareth family escutcheon. He said they were taking him to hospital to check—I hadn’t, by the way—and they intended to sue. Then the headmistress rang and said I wasn’t welcome back at the school. Dad was furious and Mum’s never had the nerve to stand up to him.’
‘So what happened?’
‘So I was packed off to Switzerland to a finishing school. That pretty much knocked any idea of being a palaeontologist on the head but, on the other hand, they ran cooking classes because that was supposed to be seemly, and if I wanted to do five cooking classes a week that was okay by them. So we had Monsieur Fromichade who I promptly fell in love with, even though I was sixteen and he was sixty. We still exchange recipes.’
‘So happy ever after?’
She grimaced. ‘It worked for a while. I took every cooking course I could and that was okay. Dad approved of what he told his friends were my three star Michelin intentions. Finally I took a job as an apprentice in a London café. It was simple food, nothing epicure about it. But I loved it.’
She paused, seemingly reluctant to expose any more of her family’s dirty linen, but then she shrugged and continued. ‘But then things fell apart at home.’ She sighed. ‘My sister had been overseas for years. There were rumours circulating about her behaviour on the Riviera and somehow Dad made it all Mum’s fault. He’s always favoured Felicity and he blamed Mum for her leaving home. Then Grandma died and Mum...got sick. Depression. She started phoning every day, weeping, begging me to come home. Finally I caved. I came home and Mum was in such a state I was frightened. I even agreed to what my Dad wanted, for me to be a company PR assistant. I thought I’d do it for a while, just until Mum recovered.’
She shrugged again. ‘And it worked for a while. With me around to stand up for her, Dad stopped being such a bully. That took the pressure off Mum and things looked better. For Mum, though, not for me. And then Brett decided to court me.’
‘Brett?’ He shouldn’t ask but how could he help it?
‘It seems every guy I’ve ever dated has turned out to be fascinated by my parents’ money,’ she said bluntly. ‘So I should have known. But maybe I was vulnerable, too. Brett’s yet another toad, but I was too dumb and, to be honest, I was too unhappy and caught up in family drama to see it. I hadn’t realized until I got home how close to the edge Mum was, and I was scared. I was trying every way I knew to make her feel good. Brett’s a financial guru, smart, savvy and he knows how to pander to Dad. He’s also good-looking and oh, so charming. In those awful months Brett helped. He honestly did. You have no idea how charming he was. He made me feel...special, and when he asked me to marry him I was dumb enough to say yes.’
‘So celebrations all round?’
‘You think?’ she said bitterly. ‘You know, the moment I said yes I had my doubts but I’m my mother’s daughter. Dad was happy. Mum was well. For a while it was happy families all round. But then Felicity returned and Brett realized Felicity was Dad’s absolute favourite and he could be part of our family and not have to sacrifice himself with the dumpy one.’
‘Humiliation piled on humiliation,’ he said softly and she cast him a glance that was almost scared.
‘Yeah. I was paying too big a price to keep people happy and I’ve realized it. I’m over it.’
‘I’m sure you’re not.’
And she managed a smile. ‘Maybe not quite, but I will be after a year’s cooking at Malley’s.’
‘You can’t go there.’
‘When the water goes down, of course I can.’
‘You’ll hate it. The last time Malley set a mouse trap... Well, I’ve never seen one. What I have seen are dead mice.’
‘Ugh!’
‘Everywhere. He baits them and doesn’t bother to clean.
‘I can clean,’ she said in a small voice.
‘I bet you can but you shouldn’t have to. Don’t