‘We got them here before the house went up,’ Rob said, speaking quickly, cutting through Henry’s obvious terror. ‘They’re tired but well. They’re asleep now but they’ve been as worried about you as you seem to be about them. They’re safe.’
The man’s knees sagged. Rob grabbed the dog and hauled him back, then took Henry’s elbows under his hands, holding him up. He looked beyond exhaustion.
‘They’re safe,’ he said again. ‘I promise. Happy Christmas, Henry. I know your house is burned and I’m sorry, but things can be replaced. People can’t. Everything else can wait. For now, come in and see your wife.’
And Henry burst into tears.
* * *
After that things seemed to happen in a blur.
There was a whimper behind him. Rob turned and Amina was there, staring in incredulity. And then somehow she was in Rob’s place, holding her husband, holding and holding. Weeping.
And then Danny, flying down the hall. ‘Papa...’ He was between them, a wriggling, excited bundle of joy. ‘My Papa’s come,’ he yelled to anyone who’d listen and then he was between them, sandwiched, muffled but still yelling. ‘Papa, our house burned and burned and Luka was lost and I was scared but Rob found me and then we hid in a little cave and we’ve been here for lots and lots and Santa came and we had turkey but we didn’t have chocolates. Mama had them for us but they’ve been burned as well, but Mama says we can get some more. Papa, come and see my presents.’
Rob backed away and then Julie was beside him, in her gorgeous crimson robe with her gorgeous crimson hair, and she was sniffing. He took her hand and held and it felt...right.
They finally found themselves in the kitchen, watching Henry eat leftover Christmas lunch like he hadn’t eaten for a week—but he still wasn’t concentrating on the food. He kept looking from Amina to Danny and back again, like he couldn’t get enough of them. Like he was seeing ghosts...
His plane last night, a later one than Rob’s, had been diverted—landing in Melbourne instead of Sydney because of the smoke. He’d spent the night trying to get any information he could, going crazy because he couldn’t contact anyone.
This morning he’d flown into Sydney at dawn, hired a car, hit the road blocks, left the car, dodged the road blocks and walked.
It didn’t take any more than seeing his smoke-stained face and his bloodshot eyes to tell them how fraught that walk had been. And how terror had stayed with him every inch of the way.
But he was home. He had his family back again. Julie watched them with hungry eyes, and Rob watched Julie and thought that going back was a dream. A fantasy. He couldn’t live with that empty hunger for ever.
‘We’ve plenty of water. Go and take a bath,’ he told Henry, and Danny brightened.
‘Luka and I will help,’ he announced and they disappeared towards the bathroom, with the sounds of splashing and laughter ensuing. Happy ever after...
‘I’ll go get dressed,’ Julie said, sounding subdued, and Amina touched her hair.
‘Beautiful.’
‘Yes. Thank you.’
‘Don’t waste it,’ Amina said sternly with a meaningful glance at Rob, and Julie flinched a little but managed a smile.
‘I promise I won’t wear a hat for months.’
Which wasn’t what Amina had meant and they all knew it but it was enough for Julie to escape.
Which left Amina with Rob.
‘You love her still,’ she said, almost as if she was talking of something mundane, chatting about the weather, and Rob had to rerun the words in his mind for a bit before he could find an answer.
‘Yes,’ he said at last. ‘But our grief threatened to destroy us. It’s still destroying us.’
‘You want...to try again?’
‘I don’t think we can.’
‘It takes courage,’ she whispered. ‘So much courage. But you...you have courage to spare. You saved my son.’
‘It takes more than courage to wake up to grief every morning of your life.’
‘It’s better than walking away,’ she said softly. ‘Walking away is the thing you do when all else fails. Walking away is the end.’
‘Amina...’
‘I shall cook dinner,’ she announced, moving on. ‘Food is good. Food is excellent. When all else fails, eat. I need to inspect this frozen-in-time kitchen of yours.’
‘You need to rest.’
‘I have rested,’ she said. ‘I have my husband back. My family is together and that’s all that matters. We need to move on.’
* * *
Christmas dinner was a sort of Middle Eastern goulash made with leftover turkey, couscous, dried herbs, packet stock and raisins. It should have tasted weird—half the ingredients were well over their use-by dates—but it tasted delicious. The house had a formal dining room but no one was interested in using it. They squashed round the kitchen table meant for four, with Luka taking up most of the room underneath, and it felt right.
Home, Rob thought as he glanced at his dinner companions. That was what this felt like. Outside, the world was a bleak mess but here was food, security, togetherness.
Henry couldn’t stop looking at Amina and Danny. From one to the other. It was like he was seeing a dream.
That was what looking at Julie felt like too, Rob thought. A dream. Something that could never be.
But still... Henry had made a quick, bleak foray across to the ruins of his house and came back grimly determined.
‘We can build again,’ he’d said. ‘We’ve coped with worse than this.’
Building again... Could he and Julie? A building needed foundations, though, Rob thought, and their foundations hardly existed any more. At least, that was what Julie thought. She thought their foundations were a bed of pain, of nightmares. Could he ever break through to foundations that had been laid long before the twins were born?
Did he have the strength to try?
‘You have our safe,’ Henry said as the meal came to an end and anxiety was in his voice again. ‘You said you managed to haul it out.’
‘I did,’ Rob told him. ‘I’m not sure whether the contents have withstood the fire.’
‘It’s built to withstand an inferno. And the contents...it’s not chocolate.’
‘I’d like some chocolate,’ Danny said wistfully, but there was ice cream. Honestly, wrapped containers might cope with a nuclear blast, Rob thought as they sliced through the layers of plastic to ice cream that looked almost perfect.
But Amina didn’t want any. She was looking exhausted again. Julie was watching her with concern, and Rob picked up on it.
‘You want to go back to bed?’ he asked her. ‘All of you. Henry’s had a nightmare twenty-four hours and you’ve made us a feast of a Christmas dinner. You’ve earned some sleep.’
‘I’m fine,’ Amina said, wincing a little. ‘I just have a backache. I need a cushion, that’s all.’
In moments she had about four and they moved into the living room, settled in the comfortable lounge suite...wondering where to go from here.
He’d quite like to carry Julie back to the bedroom, Rob thought. It was Christmas night. He could think of gifts he’d like to give and receive...
But Danny had slept this afternoon, and he was wide awake now. He was zooming back and forth