Derek Landy

Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 1 - 12


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done. He’s not this great and good hero you think he is.”

      “You don’t know what I think of him.”

      Scapegrace laughed. “I can see it in your eyes. Everyone can. It’s cute actually, the way you follow him around, believing every word he says.”

      Valkyrie shifted her weight slightly and the bed creaked and moved, and the bandage tugged on his fingers. Scapegrace howled.

      “Sorry,” she said unconvincingly.

      “You did that on purpose!” he raged.

      The slot in the door opened up and a pair of eyes peered in.

      “What’s going on in there?” a voice demanded. Valkyrie bounded to her feet, jarring the bed and making Scapegrace howl again.

      “You can’t keep me here!” she called.

      “Who is that? Are there … are there two people in there?”

      She recognised his voice now – the cell guard they had encountered the previous day.

      “Weeper?” she said.

      His eyes found her and they widened in shock. “Valkyrie Cain?”

      “Remus Crux put me in here, with a man who wants to kill me. You can’t keep me here. Please.”

      Beneath her, Scapegrace snorted contemptuously. She nudged the bed with her foot and heard him mewl in pain.

      “Why did he make you share a cell?” Weeper asked. “We’ve got four empty ones. Are you OK? Have you been injured?”

      “Please get me out of here.”

      “I can’t transfer prisoners without orders from my superiors.”

      “But this isn’t even a transfer! This is just moving from one cell to another! Please, Weeper. If you leave me in here another minute, he’ll kill me.”

      She looked down at Scapegrace and glared, and he sighed.

      “She’s right,” he said reluctantly. “I’ll kill her.”

      On the other side of the door, Weeper was shaking his head. “I’m sorry, there is a procedure to follow. Just wait there, I’ll get this sorted out in ten minutes.”

      “Don’t go!” Valkyrie cried. She had moved her hands behind her back, and was hoping Weeper wouldn’t have noticed that they had been at her sides. “Please, move me to an empty cell and then check with your bosses. I’m defenceless in here. Please, Weeper.”

      She made her eyes as wide as possible and Weeper sighed.

      “Fine,” he said gruffly. “Put your hands through the bottom slot so I can cuff you.”

      “I’m already cuffed. Crux didn’t bother removing my shackles when he threw me in here.”

      “That is strictly against protocol,” Weeper muttered disapprovingly, and she saw him open the cell directly across from hers.

      “OK then,” he said. “You are to move directly into the empty cell. You do not engage me in conversation or stall in any way. Clear?”

      “Clear.”

      “And Scapegrace, you stay on the ground or I’ll have the Cleavers here so fast …”

      “I’m not moving,” Scapegrace said.

      “All right then. I’m opening the door.”

      The door swung open and Valkyrie breathed with relief. “Thank you,” she said.

      “Move to the empty cell.”

      She stepped into the corridor. “Thank you so much.”

      “The cell. In. Now.”

      “I’m really sorry about this,” she said as she brought her hands up and pushed lightly at the air. The space between them rippled and Weeper stumbled backwards into the empty cell, tripping over his own legs. Before he could recover, Valkyrie slammed the door.

      Immediately, his eyes appeared at the open slot. “Oh, no. This can’t happen again.”

      “I’m so, so sorry.”

      Scapegrace got to his feet, carefully untying the bandage from his fingers. “How stupid are you?” he laughed. “Locked in your own cell, twice in two days! They give out medals for morons now, do they?”

      He was grinning as he moved to leave, but Valkyrie stood in front of him, clicking her fingers and conjuring fire into her hand.

      “And where do you think you’re going?” she growled.

      He blinked at her. “We’re escaping.”

      “We?”

      “Yes, we. We’re breaking out.”

      “You’re not going anywhere.”

      “But I helped you!”

      “You lay on the ground and whined.”

      “In a helpful manner,” he insisted. “You’re going to need my help to get out of here. You think you’re going to be able to just stroll out? You’re going to need back-up, an extra pair of eyes, even a distraction – and I think I’ve proven what a good distraction I can be.”

      She wanted to slam the door in his face, but he was right. If she was discovered, they could split up and the Cleavers would automatically go after the adult first.

      “Give me one good reason why I should even run the risk of helping you escape. Your grand ambition in life is to kill people.”

      “Yes, but …” Scapegrace faltered, then looked down at his shoes and his bottom lip quivered. “But as you keep pointing out,” he continued, “I’m not very good at it, now am I?”

      “I … suppose not.”

      Valkyrie sighed and let the flames go out in her hand.

      “Fine,” she said. “Come on and stay quiet.”

      She hurried to the desk and opened and closed drawers, searching for her phone. She found it, noted the five missed calls on the screen. She dialled Skulduggery while Scapegrace, a smile on his face, fished out loose money from an open drawer. She tapped the drawer closed with her foot, catching his fingers. He yelped and leaped back, grabbed his right hand with his left by pure instinct, and yelped again as both sets of injured fingers came into contact.

      “Valkyrie,” Skulduggery’s voice said on the phone. He sounded relieved but urgent. “Where are you?”

      Scapegrace hopped and screamed in silence beside her, and she did her best to ignore him.

      “I’m in the Sanctuary,” she said. “Did the trade happen?”

      He hesitated. “Yes. They have Fletcher, we have Guild, but he’s unconscious. We’re still fugitives until he wakes up. You’re going to have to get yourself out. Can you do that?”

      “Course I can. I’ll use the secret passage.”

      “Don’t. Guild will have deactivated it after last time. You’re going to have to leave through the main door. If you’re not out in ten minutes, I’m coming in after you.”

      “Someone’s coming, I have to go.”

      Valkyrie jammed her phone into her jeans and motioned to Scapegrace to hide. They flattened themselves against the wall and she peeked out. A sorcerer passed in the corridor ahead, never even glancing at the holding area. She waited until his footsteps had faded away.

      They didn’t have much time. Every second spent undetected was a second stolen.

      Then the lights went out.

      Valkyrie whirled, bracing herself for the attack.