isn’t really a choice, is there?’ she asked miserably. ‘All right. I’ll sign your form.’
By the time she’d signed the form and Oliver had administered the steroids, Ella came back into the room, smiling. ‘I’ve spoken to Ryan. He’s on his way now and he says to tell you he loves you and everything’s going to be all right.’
A tear trickled down Courtney’s face. ‘Even though I nearly killed our baby?’
‘You did nothing of the sort. It was an accident,’ Ella reassured her. ‘And your man will be here really soon. He says to tell you he’s going to make the world speed record for getting across town.’
Courtney’s lower lip wobbled, but she tried her best to smile.
‘So what happens now is the anaesthetist is on her way. She’s going to give you an anaesthetic, and then Oliver will make an incision here—’ she sketched the shape on Courtney’s tummy ‘—so he can deliver the baby.’
‘Can Ryan be there?’ Courtney asked.
‘If he does that world speed record,’ Ella said with a smile, ‘then he can be there and he can cut the cord. I’ll be there, too, to look after Baby Saunders. Once I’ve checked the baby over, you can both get to see him or her and have a cuddle.’
‘What if—if it’s the worst-case scenario?’ Courtney asked, a catch in her voice.
‘Then I’ll take Ryan off to one side with the baby so Oliver can sort everything out. But he’s the best surgeon I know. You’re in good hands.’
If only she had as much confidence in him personally as she had in him professionally, Oliver thought. Though part of it was his own fault. He’d held back from her. If he told her about Justine, then maybe she’d understand why he was having a hard time getting his head round the fact that he was going to be a dad—and why he needed to feel that he was in control of everything. But then again, letting her close enough to meet his family had backfired.
This whole thing was a mess.
But doing the job he did, seeing how important family was to the women he helped to give birth and their partners… It was beginning to make him realise that he wanted this, too. He didn’t want to be just a dad. He wanted to be a partner, too. He wanted to be loved for who he was.
But what did Ella want? Could they make a go of things together? Could they become a family, the kind of family that he hadn’t grown up in but suspected that she had?
By the time the anaesthetist had administered the spinal block, Ryan had arrived for a tearful reunion with his wife. Oliver glanced at Ella and saw the wistfulness on her face. So was this affecting her, too?
Their talk would have to wait until after this operation. But Oliver was determined to sit down and talk to Ella properly and find out what she wanted—and, with any luck, it would be the same thing that he wanted. And then they could move forward properly. Together.
Thankfully, delivering the baby and the placenta stopped the bleeding, so he didn’t have to give Courtney a hysterectomy. And their little girl, although tiny and in need of a day or two in the neonatal unit, looked as if she was going to do very well indeed.
Once he’d finished the operation and Courtney had gone through to the recovery room, he was on his own with Ella.
‘Can we take ten minutes?’ he asked. ‘I’ll buy you a cup of tea, if you like.’
‘Thanks, but I need to be elsewhere,’ she said. ‘I promised to help Jennie with her studies.’
Again? His heart sank. This sounded like another evasion tactic. Maybe he was wrong about this after all, and she didn’t want the same thing that he did. ‘Ella, I think we need to talk.’
‘No need,’ she said with a brisk smile. ‘Everything’s fine.’
He didn’t think so; and, from the expression in her eyes, neither did she.
‘How about dinner tonight?’
‘Sorry,’ she said. ‘I really do have to go.’
Which left Oliver to walk back to his office alone.
He sat at his desk, trying to concentrate on his pile of admin, and wondering how everything between him and Ella had gone so wrong. Was it his imagination, or was she finding excuses to be anywhere but near him?
And how was he ever going to persuade her to give him a chance?
He was beginning to think that he needed a Christmas miracle. Except they were in very short supply, and in any case he ought to be able to sort this out on his own.
‘YOU LOOK TERRIBLE, ELLA,’ Annabelle informed her best friend. ‘Rough night?’
‘I’m fine,’ Ella fibbed.
‘I’ve known you for a lot of years now,’ Annabelle said softly, ‘and you’re not fine. What’s wrong?’
Ella grimaced. It was all so complicated. Where did she even start?
‘That was a pretty stupid question,’ Annabelle said. ‘Obviously it’s Oliver.’
‘Not so much Oliver as his family,’ Ella admitted.
Annabelle winced. ‘I thought you said Thursday night went OK?’
‘Bits of it did,’ Ella said. ‘His brother’s nice, and so is his sister-in-law.’
‘So the problem’s his parents?’
Ella nodded miserably. But she couldn’t tell Annabelle the whole story. It wasn’t hers to tell, and it wouldn’t be fair to break Oliver’s confidence; Ella was the only person in the department who knew about his background. But she could tell Annabelle some of it, and maybe Annabelle would have some ideas about how to deal with it. ‘His mum wants me to have a paternity test.’
‘What?’ Annabelle looked shocked. ‘That’s ridiculous.’
But it didn’t bother Ella anywhere near as much as the other thing that the Countess had suggested. ‘And she wants Oliver to have custody of the baby.’
Annabelle frowned. ‘What does Oliver say about it?’
‘He doesn’t know,’ Ella admitted. ‘He wasn’t there when she said it.’
‘Then talk to him about it. Tell him what she said.’
‘That’s the problem. I can’t,’ Ella said. ‘He doesn’t get on that well with his parents.’
‘Then obviously he’ll take your side. And no way is he going to take the baby from you.’
Oh, but he could. Especially if she had a boy and Prue had a girl—because then Ella’s baby could be the future Earl of Darrington. But explaining that wouldn’t be fair to Oliver. ‘It’s complicated,’ Ella hedged. ‘And I don’t want to make things worse between Oliver and his parents. It wouldn’t be fair to make him choose sides.’
‘Talk to him,’ Annabelle advised. ‘And if Oliver Darrington’s even half the man I think he is, he’ll tell his mother to back off and to start treating you with a bit of courtesy.’
‘I’m not even officially his girlfriend,’ Ella pointed out.
‘He took you to meet his family. Which he wouldn’t have done if he wasn’t serious about trying to make a go of things with you,’ Annabelle countered.
But Oliver hadn’t said anything about his feelings. And Ella didn’t want to try to make a go of it just for the sake of the baby. Sienna’s words rang all too true: It’s much better for a baby